My cat is in the dryer

Left the dryer door open when I took the towels out. Very seriously tempted to slam the door shut and turn it on. In fact I explained to the cat that that was my intention. She just sat in the dryer and looked at me.

Stupid bloody cats.

It’s warm.

It’s a hole.

It’s a good size.

It’s dark but not too much.

Why wouldn’t the cat want to be there?

My dog has a similar preference for the bathtub. If I neglect to close the bathroom door tightly, he’ll head in, lay in the tub and go right to sleep. He must prefer the coolness, which is rather funny, because he’s a short-haired breed (a Lab). I swear, one day soon, I’m gonna sneak up on him with the camera. The sheepish look on his face when he’s busted is priceless.

My cat Elvin does that all the time. We live in a condo and so have a stackable washer dryer unit with the dryer on top. There’s usually a loud rumble and thud when 16 lbs of cat hit the dryer.

I was doin’ laundry just the other day,
Presoaking the stains 'cause that’s the Heloise way, when
In came the cat, my adopted stray,
Little knowing that soon there would be Hell t’pay.
The dryer door was open and the cat went on through,
This kinda thing could happen to you too,
I never got a chance to say shoo…

And the cat’s in the dryer and it’s goin’ round,
The tabby in the tumbler is so sad and profound,
Like sentimental songs that show you what you’ve missed,
You’ll get it in a last-verse twist, yeah,
You navel-gazing solipcist.

I was matchin’ up dress socks when I heard a whine,
“Fellas,” I said, "I think that cat of mine
"Is stuck in the bottom of the Maytag line,
“I better go before he uses number nine.”
And when I found him I thought hey if NASA trained cats,
I bet they’d do it just like that,
Centrifugally mash 'em flat.

The cat in the dryer just got barely charred,
Made good as new with spritz (or two) of Static Guard,
It’s almost time to jerk your heartstrings shamelessly,
So think about the poor dead flea, yeah,
God’s creature just like you and me.

And as I got the cat some milk to soothe his mind,
I thought of others left behind,
to whom the world has not been kind,
Like kids whom mercy does not find,
who are sick and maimed and dead. Oh, and blind.

Our daughter put her new kitten in the dryer. She didn’t intend to turn it on or anything – she just looked cute in there.
I explained to her that cats do not go in the dryer, ever. She asked “why?”, and explained that if the kitten peed in there then she was welcome to try and clean it out, or else all our clothes would smell like cat pee.

That crazy MilliCal and her hijinks…
…what WILL she do next?

[SIZE=2](it IS MilliCal, right?)[/SIZE]

You got it, LOUNE.

I’m just surprised she didn’t try to photograph her in there.

True story: I was about 8 and leaving my friend Ben’s house to walk home. I got about 3 houses away and heard Ben’s mom’s voice yelling in a horrible, bloodcurdling yell: “SAMMMMMMMM, NOOOOOOO, SAMMMMMM!!!”

Sam being their black cat. Who went for a ride in the dryer, and wasn’t noticed going in.

:eek:

KOS, brilliant just brilliant!

Gives new meaning to the name “Fluffy” don’t it? :smiley:

Bravo! Bravo!

I think I like that version better than the original.

What I’ve heard you should do, and what I plan to do if one of the Neville kitties ever gets into the dryer, is slam the door and pound the hell out of the top of the dryer. Then let the frightened cat streak out (probably at a respectable percentage of the speed of light). That teaches them that the dryer isn’t a nice, cozy, warm place for a cat to be. It seems cruel, but having the cat in the dryer when it is on is much, much worse.

My aunt was in a rush to get things ready for Thanksgiving dinner one year and wasn’t paying attention to a lot of things. She threw some dish towels into the dryer and started it. When she heard the thudding she thought that one of her kids had put some shoes in the dryer but she didn’t open it to check.
An hour later she was calling her mother to talk about what time they would be coming by. Right as her mother answered the phone, my aunt opened up the dryer and out flopped poor, dead Mama Kitty (that was her name). Of course she starts screaming and crying, repeating, “Oh God, she’s dead! She’s dead!”
Her mother, not knowing about the cat, thinks that one of the kids had been killed and starts crying and gets hysterical asking, “Who was it, honey? Is it Amy? Is it Stella? Who?”
The two of them cried and bawled on the phone for almost 5 minutes before my aunt finally manages to say, “It’s Mama Kitty! She climbed into the dryer and I killed her!”
Her mother caught her breath and said, in as controlled a voice as possible, “You mean I’ve been crying my eyes out for five minutes, sure that one of my granddaughters was dead, when actually you were talking about your fucking cat!”
My aunt’s sister kept giving her grief about being a Maytag murderer and for that Christmas gave her two kittens: one named Fluff and the other was Dry.

That’s some cold $h!t. If I accidentally killed my pet, I sure as hell wouldn’t want someone making a joke about it. In fact, if they did, I’m pretty sure they’d get one warning then a punch in the throat.

That’s OK. My aunt got her sister back. The following year during a holiday party, she put a very realistic stuffed cat in the dryer and told her sister to get the dish towels out. We were all in on the joke. When her sister opened the dryer and the stuffed cat fell out you could have heard the scream a mile away. She stormed into the room and threw the stuffed cat at my aunt and started screaming at the rest of us who were rolling on the floor, tears streaming down our faces. Finally, she stopped screaming and started laughing. She then went up to my aunt and gave her a hug and apologized for being such a shit.
I’ll admit it, my family is screwed up.

My cat likes the dryer while the clothes are still wet. He will also climb onto the bottom rack of the dishwasher and lay across the pointy uppy prong things.

This thread reminds me of bounce.

Sounds like a swami (Indian ?) kitty :stuck_out_tongue:

I’m still paranoid about cats and dryers, two years after reading that thread. Every time I’m going to run the dryer, I make sure that I see both kitties, so I know they’re not in the dryer.

Funny, I was thinking that…I recently started a thread about how my cats whoo are brother and sister look nothing alike. The brother being fluffy beyond all levels of feline decency (if there is such a thing) and the girl in the dryer being the sleek one. I thought if I set it to “fluff” she would have a chance of having more in common with her brother.

Do you think I should throw in one of those dryer towelette thingies?

(Incidentently when I posted this I had no idea there would be so many cat/dryer stories. My sympathies to Mama Kitty.)