My Christmas Erection.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

Anaamika: I love that penguin! Pengy pengy pengy! He’s so cute! Beautiful tree!

Also, I apologise for laughing like a loon to the “reinforcements” remark. I hadn’t noticed it until NurseCarmen pointed it out, and now I’m gasping for breath. Awesome. :smiley:

taxi78cab: Clever with the boxes. :wink: I wish mine looked nearly as decorative, but mine are all clear plastic. The sad thing is, I actually have wrapped gifts this year - about* two dozen * of them - but they’re all packed in a box to be shipped back home to family. Damn.

Also, I love the ribbon - that’s what I originally wanted to do with my blue organza one, but it wasn’t quite long enough, no matter how I stretched or draped it. So I cut mine into bite sized bits and tied them into branches.

Bookkeeper: HA! I love how they sit in there so casually, looking like that’s where they’re supposed to be!

My two cats, every year, tear the tree to bits. I also have some of that red beaded garland, and that attracted them like a magnet. The first day I put my tree up this year, I finished, felt tired, so went to take a nap. An hour later, I come back out, and find all but two branches were left on the tree! The little one would climb, pull a branch out, drop it down to the oldest one, waiting on the floor, then she would take the branches and drag them to all corners of the house. Oh, yeah, it’s funny now, but at the time I was screaming bloody murder. Eventually, I reassembled the tree, with parts left over that I couldn’t figure out where they belonged.

I ended up taking a light, chemical free orange oil spray product, and misting the tree and the floor around it with it. I read that cats hate citrus - so far, so good - not a branch has been taken since. They still wander near the tree, but I wonder if the orange oil leaves a nasty flavour in their mouth. The worst I’ve had since the “two branch” incident is two of the lower ornaments were knocked on the floor. I reapplied the orange spray, and there hasn’t been an ornament lost since.

Ahhhh. :slight_smile:

22

I love penguins…I have three penguin ornaments. And don’t worry about laughing, I did too. It was a very witty remark.

23

I took one or two full shots and they didn’t look so hot (stupid blurry digital camera), so here are some close ones …

Little snowman.
Little bear guy.
Little moon guy.

24

Now with ornaments. :slight_smile:

25

Ok, here’s my unimpressive erection…

A whole whopping 12 inch tree. I don’t have kids, and can’t be bothered to put up anything bigger.

The chicken on skis at the base of the tree and the green dreamcatcher were given to me by laina_f for the ornament exchange last year. I think the chicken is probably my favorite ornament. :slight_smile:

26

I’m afraid I won’t be getting an erection this year.:frowning: If I do, it won’t be big, or up for long.

27

Our cats mostly ignore the tree, with the worst problem being an occasional ornament knocked off by a passing tail, but Peach, the cat in the picture, sees it as her personal crusade to alternate removing every ornament and garland she can reach with climbing as high as she can get on the inner branches. We normally keep a spray bottle handy at Christmas time, as she hates getting wet, although sometimes she is dripping before she gets discouraged. She doesn’t much bother it when there’s no-one around - it’s mostly an attention getting device (she’s a very neurotic cat). I think we might just try your orange oil trick this year.

28

Mine right now is just two stockings (that I made :slight_smile: ) hanging from the shelf, but I am going home for Christmas and here is part of my Mom’s from two years ago.

29

sigh I just couldn’t NOT put up a tree. I am feeling a little more Christmas-y.

Ready to kill the cats tho , they seem to think I put it up strictly for their fun and enjoyment. :rolleyes:

Anyway… It’s not much , but here it is:

30

Hoping we wouldn’t notice the Dungeons and Dragons: Monstrous Compendium binder, were we? :smiley:

31

I finally got a chance to take pictures of our tree. Well, it’s my girlfriend’s tree, I only helped a little:

Full tree
Closeup 1
Closeup 2
Closeup 3

32

Totally agreed. When my wife and I had our first tree, she was very dubious about my choice of decorations – dark purple and gold metallic bulbs, white lights, sheer gold ribbons, and a gold filigree fairy topper. I remember her standing with me in whatever store it was, looking completely appalled at the things I had in the basket – where was the red and green?! The tinsel?! The icicles?! The teddy bear ornaments?! The star?! Had I never celebrated Christmas, for fuck’s sake?!

When I got it all pulled together and flicked the lights on for her, her jaw literally dropped and she declared I’d pick out anything and everything for any trees we had from then on out. I still smile remembering her reaction.

33

From the thread title, I was expecting a Snow Penis.

34

Now that is an impressive erection! I’ll bet you could easily “hit the ceiling” with that rascal, eh? Eh? Eh?

35

Oooooooooooohhhoooooooooooohhh! Nice! That’s a nice, full tree! Mine is so skimpy! :smiley:
That thing is gorgeous.

And to everyone else, I love your trees, too - I’ve been meaning to ressurrect this thread when I got back from vacation so others could show off their trees, as well, but YAY, it’s been bumped for me! :wink:

More, more! Don’t be shy! Show me your erections! Be proud! We take 'em all, the big, fat ones, and the wee, skinny ones, and everything in between! No one is turned away. :cool:

36

That sounds awfully familiar. Here’s her erection for this year.

(there’s an edge of a nude painting visible in the background. Unless you work with the prudiest of prudes, it shouldn’t be a problem, but I might as well warn you ahead of time).

37

But I think it’s just spiffy…

We normally get a larger one, but this year, we just didn’t have the space.

I love Santa!!