This summer has certainly been an eventful one. But i think that the thing that may end up standing out most in my mind years from now when i come to remember it is being betrayed by my friend, Chris Niece. The two of us had been friends for almost six years. Last year he started hanging out with the “in-crowd” of our school, a group i am proud to say i’m not a member of. i could see it changing him every day. Then, one day in July, he told my sister that he thinks i am a wannabe goth (mind you, i have NOTHING against goths, i just hate it when somebody calls me a wannabe anything) and that i’d probably end up blowing up the school. This because i preferred to hang out with the less social element of our horribly political high school. i pretty much told him to fuck off and he proceded to tell me that he was a much better person and that his real friends, the preppy assholes he hung out with (who i hear really can’t stand him), were all he needed. So a very tight 7 year friendship ended because he decided he was too important for me.
What i would like to ask you all is that you help my revenge cause and suggest a few legal but efficient methods of revenge. If you’d like his e-mail address, feel free to ask, but i’m not aboot to ask anyone to go spamming. i know the rules.
Let it go. If he sees that you are putting time and effort into getting back at him, it’ll (in his mind) make him all that much more better than you. The best message you can send to him is that he isn’t worrth an ounce of your energy.
Just let it slide. And it’s probably not much condolensce, but this kind of thing happens a lot in high school. Keep in mind that ten years from now, you won’t even remember 99 and 3/4% these people’s names.
Judging only from your post, I’d have to say your ex-friend is justified in worrying about your future.
I hope you live to outgrow your apparent belief in the practical value of revenge.
Revenge is a deal with the devil: it offers you extremely short-lived satisfaction in exchange for making you a cumulatively meaner person and proving your enemies right. It will cause him no permanent pain, and it will do your psyche lasting harm.
Prove to him that your universe is bigger than his, and that he’s not important enough for you to expend any more energy on his behalf. In short, get over him; outgrow him. Revenge is antithetical to growth.
This is not unusual. I know it’s hard not to take it presonally but your friend and you are growing apart. He has found interests outside your 7 year relationship and he has begun to move on. You should move on as well. Do not dwell. Do not mope too long about it. Do not plot revenge - it’s childish. Move on with your life, explore new interests, especially ones outside of the school context so you do not have to deal with your school “politics”. Remember, virtually every highschool student thinks his/her life is the most dramatic. It’s not. You have not yet begun to live and you’ll realize it when you begin to mature.
He isn’t worth the trouble of wasting your energy to exact any kind of revenge. Leave it be. And for what it’s worth, pretty much all high schools are like yours. I know it seems like forever but it will be over soon enough and you’ll be wondering why you placed so much importance on all the social bull crap. My daughter has held a very healthly disdain for the “preps” (which usually equates to kids from wealthier families) at her school since 6th grade. That’s when the real divisions between us as people start to occur. I have often advised her to remain “neutral” as much as possible. Be yourself that’s all you can do. It’s when you begin yourself to develop a preoccupied hatred for people that you begin to doubt yourself. Your friend obviously has a serious self esteem problem and believes that these people are better than him. Perhaps they do dress better, they may even enjoy some of privledges that others do not. But since you’ve never been to a 10 or 20 year reunion and seen where people end up then you can never know that this obvious “edge” they seem to enjoy now often means nothing once they reach adulthood.
Just be yourself. Do your best to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Don’t be false, but don’t be judgemental either. It will only make YOU miserable. Your friend is a very sad case of how the pressure of wanting to “be someone” can corrupt a person. It’s sad but you have to let him go. Be the bigger man and just get on with your own life. Try not to place blame on others. One day they will see the light and if they don’t who cares!? Their attitudes cannot destroy your self worth or happiness because you don’t need their approval. In the end your integrity is all that matters. Good Luck
Show up at your 20th reunion looking absolutely smashing, with an incredible date on your arm, and a job (either real or made-up) that will make this bozo whither in envy.
what everyone else said.
but if you still want revenge …
first, the adage that ‘revenge is a dish best served cold’ is definitely true.
bide your time for a while so the heat dies down. then, when he least expects it…WHAM! smack him in the face with a sock full of change.
or SQUISH - the old fork in the eye (got that one from moe).
or from ‘unforgiven’ - ambush him on the toilet.
there’s a good steven king story about revenge involving a cadillac and a job with a road crew but it’s probably a lot of work for revenge against someone not wanting to be your friend.
an unexpected knee in the nuts is always good for a few laughs. you get the idea - use your imagination.
Eve is right. Just live a great life, and show him at your High School reunion.
I had a friend in school that did something simular to me. She was so screwed up. We were best friends for years, but she wanted to be “popular” (she never did suceed at this.) I was an arty nerd, so I got dumped in her attempt to fit in with the popular crowd. It hurt me a great deal. But I got over it, and was eventually happy to be rid of her.
One thing I remember about her, she really relished the fact that I was fatter than her. It made her feel better about herself (and she was not always shy about reminding me) that she looked better than me, because she was thinner than me.
I saw her in a store a few years ago (it was 10+ years since high school.) I don’t know if she saw me (we didn’t acknowlege each other.) Since high school, I had lost weight. Mind you, I wasn’t thin, but I had an evenly proportioned figure, and looked nice, overall. A definite improvement from high school.
She, on the other hand, had developed this HUGE ass. HUUUUGE. Very bottom-heavy. Life is full of irony. Just give it time - fate, or nature, will exact it’s revenge. You needn’t do a thing.
This is similar to what my ex-best friend did to me. Yeah I’m still in high school and I know that after school this will all mean nothing to the real world, but while you are in school, this IS the real world.
Anyhoo, she dumped me for the popular group, I moved on, found new friends, she started rumours about me, also calling me a fake goth and so forth. I’ve decided to move on, and you know, Karma is your best revenge. Just wait for it. She is now a complete loner at school, no one likes her and everyone thinks she’s a bitch. Whereas I have a new bunch of wonderful friends. You’ll get your revenge eventually. Just don’t dwell on it more than is necessary.
And Mjollnir - what goth is is one of the biggest mysteries of mankind. It’s actually a subculture which started in the 70’s-80’s and spurred from Punk. Beh. I could go on but I’m sure you care a pantsful.
The best advice I ever got was from a high school buddy, Steve McSherry. Steve, if you’re out there, props to you.
One day I was bitching about so-and-so or something - I was fairly popular but everyone has their complaints - and Steve said, “Rick, in five years you won’t care whether these idiots are alive or dead. Including me.”
It occurred to me that he was probably right. And as it turns out, he was.
