There’s plenty of that, also. My nephew asked if I could fly up and go over all the Franklin Mint coins :rolleyes:, legitimate coins, and books of stamps to see if they are viable for eBay sale.
And surely he’s offered to pay all your expenses to do so…
Bosda, I’m sorry to hear about your troubles with your brother.
Icarus, you would think that would avoid problems. However, even having nothing might not help. When my aunt died back in the 1990s, she left about $1,200, after all the bills were paid. She did not have a will. Her three kids fought over the division of that amount.
Twelve. Hundred. Dollars.
Tore my cousins apart, and they don’t talk to each other any more.
Seriously, WTF?
10 year old car? I couldn’t stand to have something that new.
That sounds potentially problematic, tax-wise. Life insurance is tax free. The $50K she gave you might be a taxable gift.
I’m not an accountant or tax lawyer or anything; just raising a point of possible relevance. As a practical matter you’ll probably get away with it - if you get audited you have your sister’s agreement that you were really named as beneficiary. Again, not an expert though.
Gifts are taxable to the gift giver, not the receiver. Plus there’s an annual exclusion of $14k, and a lifetime exclusion of $5 million, so unless the giver is in the habit of expensive gifts it’s unlikely it’s a taxable event for her.
Most of your family stories are train-wreck-funny, but this one is train-wreck-sad and only car-wreck-funny.
Finally, completely resolved.
All over.
I’d still prefer Andy being alive & well, instead of the money.
But, we don’t get that choice.
My Dad is 74 and a retired Army general who invested wisely over the years. I’m certain he’s a millionaire but we don’t talk about it. They have a very nice home with tons of things in it with more sentimental value than anything, and my little brother is the executor of the will as he is more fiscally stable and sound than I am.
My parents have basically adopted the strategy that they are spending and giving away most of their money and stuff to my sons and I, and my brother and SIL while they are still alive.
My brother and I are not super close but we have a good relationship, I cannot imagine us fighting over Mom and Dad’s money/life insurance/whatever after they are gone. It helps that all of us live within an hour of each other and see each other somewhat regularly.
Bosda I’m glad it’s resolved. Sorry it was painful and slow.
QFT.
My birth mother inherited an estate from my grandparents worth more than 6 million in the early 80s. She and her siblings found irregularities in their parents’ estates such to quarrel over and make lawyers rich for a couple of decades as well as estranging all the families from each other. She was also mentally ill. Burned through every dime and died a pauper.
I saw the writing on the wall decades ago and made my own way, never needing or expecting an inheritance. I am sad that my two siblings both ignored what was obvious to me and are struggling because of it today.
I have my mother’s ladle, a couple of pastry cloths and some old photos I managed to smuggle out of her house (made copies to share with my sibs). That’s enough.
Due to my own personal and professional experiences, I have made my own estate plans as water tight as possible.
I am sorry you went through all that with your brother’s estate, Bosda. Watching people you love screw with each other over inheritances is so painful. I am glad you have some peace at last.
I took my daughter and son to breakfast last week to tell them about my will. Their only argument was over who would get to physically pull the plug on my respirator in the hospital, and they were both bitterly disappointed when I told them that a doctor or nurse would likely have to do it.
More seriously, Most of my estate is money (I live in a cheap condo, and my current car is unlikely to survive me), and it’s arranged to bypass probate - every account has both their names on it as survivors and all they need to do is show up at an office with the death certificate. I’m going to have the deed on my house and title on my car adjusted also, and plan to carry just enough life insurance to cover the expenses of dealing with my body, which is to be shot out of a circus cannon from the top of the Sunshine Skyway into the Gulf of Mexico (the expenses seem largely to be estimated legal fees). “Any detectable intention to remarry” is listed under “End-Stage or Terminal Conditions.”
I was foolishly pleased when their only questions were about who got the stories and drawings I used to make for them when they were little. My son will make the copies.
My mother’s death tore my four siblings and I apart; we had never so much as had a serious argument before and my mother’s will was not ambiguous. NOTHING brings out fractures like a parent’s estate.
Very good luck to you and all those who still have parents living - may this be a non-issue for you for a long time, and a civil one when it occurs.
(bolding mine)
Not that you personally need to worry about this aspect, I’m sure, but isn’t that, in general, rather a bad idea? In that, first child that make’s it to the bank with the freshly-printed death certificate can simply scarper with the contents of all bank accounts.
The joint titles to house and car, obviously, wouldn’t have that problem.
You didn’t give the money to charity did you? I hope you were able to keep it after all this strife.
I will be my mother’s executrix when the time comes and I thank God that my sisters and I are close. There won’t be any crap like that with us. And, like her own mother, my mom has already started giving things up. And her assets have one sibling or anothers name on them. For example, my name is on her checking account, so I can write out her bills.(She has a hand tremor)
When my maternal grandmother died she had very little, almost nothing, as she’d been in the nursing home for ten years. But when she moved there we all got the small items we’d wanted, and there was no fighting. I got the candy dish, probably worth $2.00 or so, it was 88 years old. But it is my most valuble possession, for the memories it gives. It’s the item I’d run with if my house was on fire.
Huh. Less than a year. Glad it resolved.
Now that is sweet. You’ve got good kids.
If an account has a POD (pay on death) to more than one person, the bank issues equal portions to everyone listed. The first child supplies the certificate, all the children get checks. Keeping addresses up to date is helpful.
Dad made one of my sisters his executrix. No problems here, I’m on good terms with all my sisters. If either of my brothers had been executor, things probably wouldn’t have gone as well.
Dad didn’t leave all that much. Maybe we can finally have new cabinets and a new floor in the kitchen. Half of our overhead cabinets are held up by two nails and the other half of the cabinets.
Can’t happen under the terms of survivorship on the accounts.
Now that I think about it, there is one thing that can interfere with the distribution of POD accounts. When my mom got ill, she added me as a signatory on her accounts. They were still POD accounts with three beneficiaries, but I was also a direct signatory. I could have emptied the accounts even before she died. I certainly could have done it after.
One oddity - out of four banks, one of the banks would not pay out to the beneficiaries because, as a signatory, I was a living owner of the account. When it was time to pay out, I sent my sisters checks from that account for their thirds.
Also, it took us about a year to sell mom’s house. And in her area, houses often took two years to sell. So we didn’t request disbursal of the accounts until after the house sold, just in case we were stuck with years of taxes, maintenance, and higher insurance*. If one of us has wanted to, they could have turned in a death certificate and requested the disbursal, which would have caused difficulties.
*We discovered that empty houses are charged a significantly higher fee for insurance.