He did the revolving door thing for a few years, and then wasn’t particularly interested in getting out and getting a job. He would rather hang with his friends in the city and squander what money he had. I finally told him that he had to be out by a specific date. I told him I loved him but he needed to get his life going. He knew that this was true and had some friends in the city he could crash with. He did a couple years of “couchin’ it”, and finally met his roommate at work. She’s definitely the “alternative” type…not much mainstream in either of these people. But she pays her bills and expects him to pay his. He likes his life in the city so he’s pulling his weight (and feeling better about himself) so he can continue doing his alternative lifestyle.
When he was younger, I couldn’t bear the thought of tossing him out, but this last time he was 25 and I figured he had enough support from his friends that I didn’t have to worry that he was eating out of dumpsters. It was hard. He’s my only child and I also had to take part of the responsibility that he was being a slacker. Not a fun thing to do. But things are much better now. I still worry, because he’s so far off the mainstream, but he really seems much happier now.