I was trying to have a meeting just now, and there’s somebody outside in the street with a megaphone. I could hear him, but not what he was saying:
“Waaa waa wa wara wa warraa waa waaar. Waa! Wra warawarawarr waraaa! Wrra wra wwarawara!”
After about 45 minutes of this, I decided to ask him to please quieten it down a little.
I went down into the street to ask him to cease and desist, in the nicest possible way.
“Hi,” I said with a smile. “I just wanted to let you know that the megaphone isn’t really doing you any favours. I’m only over the street, and I can’t hear a word you’re saying. Why don’t you just say what you have to say without the megaphone?”
“Where do you work?” he asked. I pointed. “You only can’t hear me because I’m not pointing it in your direction.”
“Well, in addition to that, it’s kind of annoying, you see. I’m trying to work, and I’m finding the noise is very distracting. If you insist on using the megaphone, maybe you should do your proselytising somewhere else?” Bad choice of word.
He angrily waved the megaphone at me. “I’m NOT proselytising.”
“What are you talking about, then?”
He pointed the megaphone right at my head and shouted through it: "I’M TALKING ABOUT THE WORD OF LORD JESUS CHRIST!
“DO YOU KNOW THE LOVE OF LORD JESUS CHRIST? DO YOU LOVE HIM?!?!”
“I’ve no real opinion,” I managed to shout back, “but one of his supporters is really starting to piss me off. You’re only alienating people with this meth-”
“I AM NOT ALIENATING PEOPLE,” he replied through the megaphone. “YOU WILL REMEMBER THIS DAY! BY THE WORD OF GOD!” he yelled, angrily pointing me out to a crowd of people. “THE WORD OF GOD IS THE WORD OF LOVE!”
Defeated, I retreated to the office. He’s now pointed the fucking thing right at my building, and I can indeed hear every word he’s saying.
I’m not yet converted.