When I run into these people on the street I try to freak them out and get away as fast as possible, here is my favorite thing:
when they hand me literature I act like it burns, drop it and keep on walking (do NOT look back or stop).
unclviny
So, you’re saying it worked? 
[sub]PS to Bosda: I like your sig, but it’s “swirls,” not “squirrels.”[/sub]
Daniel Withrow, whoever that young woman is, she has now brought joy and mirth to a second human being, which I’d be willing to bet is more than the guy she was talking to ever did. As for the line, “GOD WILL NOT BE MOCKED!”, obviously people’s mileage varies, but the one I’ve been worshipping has got a seriously warped sense of humour. After all, in my beliefs, He created humanity! 
CJ
(Who’s been known to mutter, “OK, God, can we get to the punchline now?”:rolleyes: )
This inspired me. It would be really cool if one could rig up a magic trick so that after you grab it, it actually catches on fire.
You then drop in the ground in front of the Jeezer, and sneer in an evil manner. In a deep voice say something like “You do not know the power of the DARK SIDE!!!” but more biblical than Star Wars-ish
I got one today. A guy walked by and stuck a pamphlet in my hand–I was sitting in the quad, minding my own business, reading a book. I jumped up and said, “HEY THANKS! HOW DID YOU KNOW I NEEDED A BOOKMARK?”
Hee hee hee…he seemed pretty embarassed.
I got one today. A guy walked by and stuck a pamphlet in my hand–I was sitting in the quad, minding my own business, reading a book. I jumped up and said (well, bellowed), “HEY THANKS! HOW DID YOU KNOW I NEEDED A BOOKMARK? DID JESUS TELL YOU?”
Hee hee hee…he seemed pretty embarassed.
Gee, two bookmarks. How generous!
This year during Banned Books week, we had an evangelist guy visit our campus. During Banned Books Week, members of the campus literary society stand on the mall in the afternoons and read passages from banned and challenged books. So we had the evangelist guy on one side of the mall shouting, “You must love the Lord of the Bible! You cannot create your own Lord!” And the Mu Xi members on the other side reading out graphic descriptions of STD symptoms (not sure which book that was from…). It was quite, quite interesting. 
Please don’t make me repeat the lady-on-the-metro story again.
Oh man, matt, that was a classic!
I LOVED that story!
I would like to hear this lady-on-the-metro story. Please tell, matt!
stpauler, I’m LMAO over here.
You know, just once I’d like to see that poor fellow who used to post here … that “love of og” guy … witnessing on the streets.
“It’s not OG, it’s GOD!”
“OG IS NOT MOCKED, SINNER! OG WILL SEND YOU TO HELL UNLESS YOU REPENT!”
“BUT IT’S GOD, NOT OG!”
“YOU DARE QUESTION THE NAME OF OG?”
Etc.
Surprisingly enough, we don’t have many people witnessing on the streets here … maybe they figure everyone’s already [brand of religion]. Hey, it means less aggravation for me…
Yea, it was a bookmark a trois.
Fionn, here you go:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=1255522#post1255522
In case anyone’s interested, here’s a picture of him telling me about the LOVE OF GOD (I love my camera phone!).
a trois --implies a number no less than 3. 
You are my new hero. I will have to remember that one.
I’d have shoved the magaphone up his arse and used the mic to ask him how he felt about it now, just so he could experience a genuine voice from within.
Or not.
Cute story there matt_mcl.
The last time I had a run in with an evangelist, it was a 20 something year old black man standing on the courner talking about how he went away to boot camp and met his friend who was standing behind him, and about how he showed him the power of Jesus and how great he was. To avoid him, I crossed the street, where I stood next to the 30 something year old man with the full beard, fishnet stockings, netted top and silver miniskirt.
Man, I love my city!
** matt ** I used that line when I was with my lesbian sister, her parnter and their two daughters in NYC last summer. “Do you know that lesbianism saves people from the power of Jesus?” Everyone in the restaurant heard me, and people started snorting trying not to laugh. It was priceless. My sister was totally amazed.
Thanks!