Me and my husband has recently decided to “open” our marriage. So far, I have been pursuing women. I would like to pursue men also, but my husband is not down for that. First of all, I get very few replies on dating sites, I assume most women in my area aren’t comfortable dating married women.
Week before last, I finally met a woman off a dating site. We had a drink and she invited me to party she was having last weekend. She had a husband and a girlfriend. Her girlfriend was quite nice, but her husband was a little standoffish. There was other women present who were in poly relationships. Except for the girlfriend, I was ignored by most people present, including the girl I met off the dating site. She was physically flirtatious with every other woman there, but me.
Right off the bat, in her messsage she told me she was only interested in being friends with me. I took that as a grain of salt, however, as men have told me that previously and they were lying. Maybe it’s different with women. So, I am a little confused that she bothered contacting me in the first place.
I’m inexperienced in dealing with poly’s and women. I was pretty quiet the whole time at the party. I wanted to flirt with some of the women there, including the woman who invited me, but I didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. I don’t have extensive knowledge on unwritten rules in this kind of situation. I did, however, have a great time.
A few days ago, I sent her a message on the dating site that I enjoyed myself and that I would like to keep in contact with her. I asked for her phone number and the link to her facebook. I have yet to hear back from her. She has signed in though, so I assume she saw my message.
So, apparently not only I have failed to become an object of the desire with this woman and her friends, but I also flunked the friendzone??? What would make her not even pursue a friendship with me? I’m sure it was nothing that I said, because again I was quiet at the party. The only person I carried a long conversation with was her girlfriend. And the conversation with her was not about anything intense. We only discussed things such as where we went to college, lived previously, hobbies, and work. We discussed nothing controversial.
Could her and her friends be turned off by people who are quiet? Could they have picked up on that I was inexperienced in interacting with people in poly relationships? Was I just ugly to them? I mean, being quiet and inexperienced has actually helped me in certain previous experiences, not harmed me.