Mysteries of the roads (aka What the?!?)

Yesterday, when I saw a tow truck being towed down the highway on a rope behind a Lincoln Town Car, I thought: Now that’s the weirdest thing I’ve seen on the road in a while.

But the road decided that yesterday was my day for odd sightings.

On the return trip, I passed the most incomprehensible bumper sticker I’ve ever seen in my life. Allow me to set the scene: A Ford SUV of the gas-guzzling “Ex-” type (Excursion, Expedition, Exhibitionist? I was too focused on the bumper sticker to remember). This large SUV had the following bumper sticker:


What the?!?! Somehow, as I passed him in my 35 mpg Toyota, I did not feel the guilt of an al-Qaeda collaborator.

And no, I saw no indications that this sticker was meant as irony.

I saw a bumper sticker last week that I’m still puzzled about:

“Repent, skateboards!”

I saw an SUV recently with one of those fish on the back. But not a Jesus fish, not a Darwin fish, not a gefilte fish, not even a Buddha fish – this one had a woman’s head in place of the fish’s head and said “Frida” in the middle.


Mama Tiger, I can only assume that the “Frida” you saw referred to Frida Kahlo, the one time wife of famous Mexican muralist Diego Rivera. She was a rebellious artist and was famous in her own right for (at the time) shocking work and bloody self-portraits. She provided the illustrations for Alister Crowley’s tarot deck and has even inspired a religious following (see link).

Not much of a mystery, but I can’t help but grin when I see a bumper sticker saying:

My kid sells crack to your honor student at <fill in blank> school

But the mysterious one is the dumptruck hauling gravel or dirt with lettering on the back of the bed (it’s about the size of the type in the phone book or dictionary) saying: please stay 100 feet from this vehicle.

Hmm. Well, this morning I was at a stoplight behind a Ford pick-up truck – with huge red letters across the back windshield screaming REDNECK! Little cowboys on either side, holding six-shooters…
Oh, and yes, I LOVE those bumper stickers, Zeldar - the one I’ve seen says “my kid beat up your honor student today.”


Cripes! She even had an affair with Trotsky! This gal was your regular psycho-amazon-warbitch from Hell. You’ll find some really interesting stuff at that website. Because Rivera was a huge man and she was so small, their brief union was called a “marriage of the elephant and the dove.”

My greatest exposure to her is from the beautiful illustrations she did for Crowley’s tarot deck. She was most definitely a prototype for the modern liberated woman. Especially so, when you consider that she lived most of her life in Mexico.


I was driving next to an old Ford pickup once, just complete rust amid Swiss cheese-like rustholes from one end to the other. We hit a little bump while slowing for a stop light, and I saw that the cab rocked in a slightly different rhythm than the bed. I don’t know what was holding it together.

This was obviously the work of a dedicated nautral activist, in this case ‘Frida Fish.’

She has been known to work with ‘Frida Whales’, ‘Frida Dolphins’,
and a distant cousin, ‘Protecta Manatees.’

They’re good hearted folk. :smiley: