National shortage of sperm in Scotland! What can we do to help?

Sperm imported to meet shortage - Experts treating infertility at a Scottish hospital have offered patients sperm imported from England because of a national shortage.

It’s those damn kilts!

I told them all that cold air up their whoops-a-dillys would come to naught! But would they listen? NOOOOOO!

Well there is the stereotype of Scotsmen being tight-fisted. Not that I believe it course… :stuck_out_tongue:

It’s the kilts like Bosda said.

Makes sense, really - England is over-supplied with wankers - just look at our Government, for goodness sake!!

Mind you, the Scots might be artificially creating a market shortage so that they can push the price up - no chance of them using it for fish food :slight_smile:

>>What can we do to help?
Beats me.


There’s a similar shortage in Belgium. I know because a friend of mine want to be fertiilized, and can’t do so in France (only couple, perhaps even married ones are allowed to do so under french law), hence she’s going to Belgium. And Belgium being one of the rare european countries allowing it receives plenty of would-be mothers and there’s a shortage of sperm. They import it from other countries, and for some reason I can’t fathom, especially from Denmark.

De Anglish our tryin to get Prima Noctis agin!

[The English are trying to get Prima Noctis again!]



“If we can’t drive them out… we’ll breed them out.”


On second thoughts, how funny - I’d have thought there were enough wankers in Edinburgh - in Holyrood anyway.

<grumble grumble, parliament buildings designed to look like upside -down boats…grumble grumble>

How about


About all that missing sperm…has anybody checked the sheep?

Maybe I can lend a hand.

Yeah, I know it was lame, and it did take me three hours to think of this comment. Thank goodness its Friday:)

Okay, first, get a grip. It’s just a stroke of bad luck in Scotland. I’m sure the authorities will soon have the matter well in hand.

Hehehe Casey. Well, as has been suggested, by Zombie and myself** I think, the authorities are a veritable shower of tossers.

Of course, in terms of recent current affairs, (if that is not too much of an oxymoron), they don?t tend to get on very well with the seamen.
Dunno how they feel about Roger the Cabin Boy, though. (Yes, OK, 'tis urban legend, I know)
<Departs with fond memories of kiddy T.V. cartoons>

I just love coming across threads like this.

“Hey, McLeod! Get off of my ewe!”

Hold on tight. I think something may be coming up.

Someone kidnap Ewan McGregor and take him to the sperm bank, post haste!

I’m behind you both.

well, shoot.