Need euphemisms for "kick some ass!"

Take it to the woodshed.

Sort priorities.

Light 'em Up!

Hit him so hard his mama feels it.

Slap the taste out of his mouth/fillings out of his teeth

Hit him five times before god knows about it.

Give him a knuckle sandwich.

It’s clobberin’ time!

Rip off his head and shit down his neck.

Bring the pain
Enter a world of hurt
Have a Come to Jesus meeting
Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women.

Some very good ones, thanks! (I can’t believe I didn’t think of “take it to the house”.) I especially like this one:

Hit 'em where they ain’t.

Go to DEFCON 1 on his ass.

Initiate the nuclear option.

Oh, I meant “Have an open and frank discussion”.

Tell his mommy on him.

I’ll clean your clock.
With a British accent “Take you to the fukin cleaner”.

How about some inventive ones?

  • Rocking it like Chuck Berry.

  • Working it like Lindsay Lohan at an all-you-can-blow cocaine bar.

Beat it like a rented mule.
Show 'em how we do it downtown.

Kick some shell. Everyone will think it’s a TMNT reference, but it’s really from the Donkey Kong 64 rap.

Give him/her a good seeing to.

This can be misunderstood, depending on whether it is accompanied by making a fist or pelvic thrusts.

Put the smack down

Droppin’ plates on yo’ ass, beyotch!: Droppin Plates on your ass beeaatch! - YouTube

Give him the full Mitch McConnell!
Go all in on a straight flush!
Going like a paid employee on that task.
On it like a Scientologist fawning over Tom Cruise.
The full Putin.

Heh, I like that one. Which of course leads to:

Going Full Monty.

Reviving my own thread to say that I’m disappointed in you guys: nobody came up with “going to the mattresses”!

In my family it was always “Cry havoc!”. But we were always better read than most ridgerunners.