Need some McCain-Palin defeat jokes/jabs

Since the election results my die-hard republican sister has taken it upon herself to text me anti-obama jokes knowing I’m the black sheep in my family who voted for Obama.
Eg. Blacks now want to change their votes to McCain since they heard Obama is going to get them jobs.
Due to recent changes grape soda, watermelon, fried chicken, malt liquor, and gold teeth will be tax exempt.


So I wanted to return the favor with some jabs back. My google-fu is coming up with zip for one-liners and the best I could come up with on my own was
Who’s there?
McCain-Palin who?

(Give me something better than that please)

I’m not sure if you’re looking for general McCain / Palin jokes, or ones specifically about their loss, but here’s one I heard from my brother.

Preemptive warning: while I admit I laughed my ass off at the joke, it is in extremely poor taste.

What’s the difference between Sarah Palin’s mouth and her vagina?

Her vagina has only spewed out one thing that was retarded

The line for administering my beatings forms on the left…

Why did the Republicans select Sarah Palin to be John McCain’s running mate?

Because Terry Schiavo wasn’t available.

Not sure it would work verbally, but I saw a t-shirt that said



patterend after the actual campaign shirts.

Hampshire, those aren’t really anti-Obama jokes as much as retarded racist jokes. So maybe simply the old, “What do you call a black guy that gets elected? ‘President’, you racist.” And then tell her to grow up and join the current century, because the racism of people like her certainly lost her party a lot of votes.
Sorry, that all sounded ardent. I just can’t believe these people exist these days.

And the line going to Hell is on the right.

I chartered a bus. It’ll be here in 45 min.

I liked the pic I saw of a campaign sign, styled like a McCain/Palin sign, that read “Geezer / Dingbat”.

The obvious thing to go after is McCain’s age. Like, now he can cross “run for president” off his Bucket List, his social security number is XXIV, he wanted a running mate who knew how to change diapers, stuff like that.

This might be kind of old, but it might work.

Did you hear that a poll was conducted in which 80 percent of men said they thought Sarah Palin was hotter than Pamela Anderson? It’s true. Eighty percent of the men polled also said they thought Pamela Anderson would make a better vice president.

Dude, that’s hilarious!

Two words: Bible Spice

I can’t take credit for it, I saw it on another message board

Yeah, I’m going to have to second this one.

Acting dumb is fun, too. “I don’t get it. Why is this supposed to be funny? Can you explain it to me?” The spluttering that will ensue is fun to watch.

Ah! the dreaded Joke Killer! That’s a potent potent weapon, and I HATE having it used against my jokes. Use that one wisely- it’s best done in person, and only if you act totally genuine. Also works well in groups of people in the know. :smiley: