New and improved: *JULY* mini rants

The BBQ Pit
1

I’ll start it off.

You know those tales about pit bulls with locking jaws of steel? How they latch on and won’t ever let go? Well, not true in real life, but I swear we have plenty of them here on the Dope. They bite down on a thread and Never Let Up.

What’s worse is there’s almost always at least two of them in long standing threads, holding opposed views. We get:

Bulldog1: X.
Bulldog2: No, Y.
Bulldog1: Wrong! It’s X.
Bulldog2: That’s stupid, it’s clearly Y.
Bulldog1: X!
Bulldog2: Y!Y!Y!
…

And six pages later it’s still:
Bulldog1: X!
Bulldog2: Y!

Note, each of them has stated his (or her, bulldogs come in both sexes) opinion over and over and over, and is aware the opposing Bulldog has read it that many times because he (or she) had responded to it. In general, after the first few exchanges no new citations or evidence is offered. By then it’s pure “I believe” X is right vs. “I believe” Y is right.

Clearly neither is going to change the other’s mind, and yet…on and on and on. Neither side can let go. I guess it’s a ego thing or something, that letting the other have the last word means you’ve lost face or the universe will be out of whack or whatever.

And so it goes on. X! Y! X! Y!

Shut the fuck up, can’t you? Or find another thread to mangle.
A side pitting to myself: Why can’t I make myself just unsub from those threads? I get the notification there’s a new post, and hope it’s an update, or a new slant from a different poster, though I know damn well it’s almost certainly the Bulldogs snarling away. :frowning:

2

I just had a tooth taken out and the novocaine is starting to wear off. :frowning:

3

One of my transitcheks got ripped. Now I’m out $65.00.

Dammit.

4

I wasn’t able to coordinate discounted transit with discounted museum admission with Navy Pier fireworks. Sucks to be us.

5

One of my cousins died a week ago.

Damn

Blew a tire on the way to the funeral

Damn^3/2

Drove 150 miles on the donut spare at 50 mph with cranky baby, pay top dollar for crappy tire in small town, but on our way

Damn^2

Got a star crack in the windshield from a rock

Damn^5/2

While we were on the road, our dogs broke into the house and peed everywhere

Damn^3

Glad the weekend is over

6

What’s a transitchek?

7

Fuck you big university. How fucking long does it take to run a simple invoice through your system? "

In the meantime, I don’t get to pay my rent, hire workers or pay myself.

We’re working or two months here.

8

My glasses frame broke a few days ago. Now I’m having to wear either my sunglasses all the time or an old pair (circa 2000) of glasses, both of which give me headaches, while I wait for my new glasses to come in.

9

I left my six month old $100 New Balance 992 running shoes at my Bally’s fitness club. Of course, their lost and found sucks and they’re not there. I’ve left combo locks at Bally’s and they never turn up in the lost and found.

I assume the clean up people just trash this stuff.

10

Sorry. Transitchek is a program where you are issued vouchers for public transit. The cost of the vouchers is taken out of your pay, but you don’t have to pay tax on that amount.

My monthly railpass costs $143.00. So I don’t pay taxes on that $143.00.

Unfortunately, the loss of that $65.00 pretty much scuttles my plans for the weekend for budgetary reasons.

11

2009 has been nothing but stress for me. Just one thing after another. The only good thing had been the relationship with the SO, which now seems to be heading down the toilet. Things have to turn around, right?

12

How my morning went (slightly paraphrased):

We had been planning to upload most of our “mission critical” client sites to NetworkSolutions just in case our servers decide to go up in smoke, or whatever, but I guess that’s no longer a good idea.

Now I have to call my client and tell her the great news. But first, I’m getting me a damn taco. :mad:

13

My rabbit got sick. Took her to the vet which cost $315, or approximately $48/pound.

She was a stray, we got her for free. This is the most expensive free rabbit ever.

14

I found the man of my dreams. Really, he is super-awesome. The sweetest, nicest boy that’s ever taken the time to be interested in me. And, to boot, he was interested in me (did I mention he was interested in me?)! It wasn’t fake.

But then something happened (well a buncha things happened, in his life), no fault of my own, and he lost interest in me. He’s depressed. He doesn’t want to be with me and there’s nothing I can do about it.

So my sweet boy is sad, and I can’t help, and once again I am single. I feel very hollow.

15

I went back to Indiana* for a high-school reunion last week.

To my fellow Hoosiers, upon finding out I live in the great state of New Jersey: Don’t say “Joisey.” No one says that and it’s just confusing.

To Chicagoans and NY/NJ people, upon finding out that I’m from Indiana: No, you have not been there, you have driven through there. You know nothing about the place, so STFU. Not all Hoosiers are retarded hicks. I’ve seen as much provinciality in New Yorkers who have never stepped foot out of the 4 Boroughs**, as I have in NW Indianaians who have never been to Chicago.

*Okay, Tito, you got it!

**Staten Island sold separately.

16

I have the first 10 pages of my thesis paper due tonight. At midnight. Haven’t started it yet, and I’m pretty sure that after making this post I’m going to go back to playing Call of Duty 4. I pit the fact that somehow waiting until the last minute has never bitten me in the ass hard enough to change the behavior.

17

Or, they’ll start listing out extremely minute, rare exceptions to something or inferring reasons person X or Y did something assholish, which clearly makes you wrong. Example,

Poster 1: I hate it when some jackass tailgates me on the highway.

Poster 2: Well, have you ever thought that perhaps that person has had a really bad day? Or maybe they have an emergency they have to get to. Hmm???

Poster 1: Look, I’m just talking about how I don’t like it when people get really close to me when I’m going 70 on the freeway. It makes me nervous and it’s not going to make me go any faster.

Poster 2: Well why don’t you stop your freaking whining and just move over to the next lane? Huh? What’s with your sense of entitlement? You’re a self-entitled jerk who can’t be bothered to move over for someone on the highway when you’re not going fast enough.

My own personal rant? **Doctors with bad bedside manners. **A conversation with a perinatologist from last Monday:

Doc: So, overly, I need to take a look at your baby really quick. We found something on the ultrasound.

Me: Okay.

Doc: Hmmm… Looks like your baby has two cysts on its brain. Wow.

Me: <goggling at the doc>

Doc: You know, these cysts are often a soft marker for a trisomy disorder called Trisomy 18. Babies with this disorder usually are born stillborn. Of those that are actually born alive, less than 5% live beyond the first year. If they manage to survive that long, they’re usuall severely mentally handicapped and have multiple other birth defects.

Me: <trying not to cry>What are you saying? Is there anything I can do?

Doc: Well, what were the results of your alpha fetal protein test?

Me: Negative.

Doc: Oh. Well, in that case, since your ultrasound is otherwise normal and the baby is moving around just fine, let’s just say these cysts are a variation of normal. You probably have nothing to worry about. Trisomy 18 is devastating and some women need to consider termination, but it looks like you won’t have to make that decision. Well, I guess we’ll see you next month for your 6-month ultrasound. Any questions?

Me: <mouth is opening and closing>So, the baby is going to be ok?

Doc: Oh, yeah. Should be fine. See you later. I’ll send your records to your regular OB.

I get that he was probably required to tell me this, but couldn’t he have done it with just a tad more finesse? Regardless of his off-hand assurances at the end, I spent the entire week last week looking up choroid plexus cysts.

18

:eek:

Wow. I think I might have reamed that doc a new one right then and there with the bluntest instrument in the exam room. Or wanted to, but really just told him/her off. Seriously NOT OK, Doc!

ETA: Required or not, why not START with the question about the alpha fetal protein test before stopping your heart?!

19

Yeah… if that wasn’t quite so fucked up, it’d make a good comedy routine.

20

That’s not BAD bedside manners, that’s HORRIBLE manners! Almost criminal!

What you should have done is clutch your heart, moan, then topple over in a faint, being sure to whack your head on the examining table as you fall.

The insurance settlement would likely be enough to pay for your perfectly normal child’s college in 18 years.