Is the lake of fire anything like Loki on the moon Io? Because if so, that’s pretty cool. I wouldn’t mind seeing that.
I want a “George” 
Well I actuially have recived a Track before, a few weeks ago I was going to a Cardinals game (I think it was against the Cubbies) and a guy was handing out copies of “The Slugger”… I took it and as soon as it touched my hand I mustered the best deamon voice I could droped it and said “It Burns…” and then walked off with the guy staring at me. :eek:
I have been getting more stuff from the Jews for Jesus people… they are a bit less fundi.;j
His4Ever, are you really, genuinely interested in trying to convert people?
I’m still waiting for that Chick tract on Scientology.
George is the perfect name for a demon. George was, if I recall correctly, the name of Satan in “Bedazzled.” Not the recent remake. I mean the one with Dudley Moore and Peter Cook.
Which was an absolutely brilliant film. I love the part where Peter Cook is sitting on the post box pretending to be God and Dudley Moore was dancing around worshipping him.
Ah, yes.
Feel the love.
Feel the fundamentalist Christian love.
For in their world, Jesus will throw you into a molten Lake of Fire[sup]TM[/sup] if you don’t utterly submit yourself to him.
Based on what I’ve seen from Jack Chick and the little sociopaths like H4E, the following list appears to be the summation of the fate of those who don’t believe in exactly their brand of thought:
[ul]
[li]Are you Muslim? Into the fire you go![/li][li]Jewish? Happy roasting.[/li][li]Buddhist? Nice knowing ya.[/li][li]Atheist? God’s got a marinade just for you.[/li][li]Agnostic? Like most fundamentalists, God really can’t tell the difference, but at least he knows enough to use a slightly different sauce for basting just before you’re thrown into the Pit.[/li][li]Catholic? Never mind that you were the only Christian church for well nigh over a thousand years, you’re still hellbound.[/li][li]Member of a liberal Protestant denomination? Close but no cigar.[/li][li]All those millions of people who lived and died in places where Christianity never had a presence? (i.e., the Native Americans of North, Central, and South America prior to the arrival of missionaries) Poor saps. They’ll make nice kindling.[/li][/ul]
If God created us solely for the purpose of his/her/its own self-gratification–“I made you to worship me, and if you don’t do this during your brief mortal existence on Earth, then your soul is absolutely fucked for all eternity”–then what does this really say about the quality of this Deity?
Is this a Deity that is really worth worshipping?
What a nasty, loathsome, mean-spirited theology.
Nuts to you, H4E. It’s your philosophy and like-minded ilk that drove me away from Christianity in the first place.
I live in a primarily Latino area surrounded by fundie churches, and have an abundance Spanish language Chick tracts. Want to relive some old memories? :eek:
(Yeah, I read them too. Same Chick garbage, no matter what language it’s in.)
Won’t somebody think of the truck driver? That poor poor truck driver. Damn the Union that made him drive that day!
To think, he had just gotten back from missionary work in Africa, and now this…
First of all, this thread needs to go in threadspotting for kingpengvin’s tract idea, H4E’s blithering idiocy, and NPavelka’s “it burns” comment.
Second of all, and it may just be me, but…
Gladys looks like a drag queen!
:eek:
Carry on.
Esprix
**Gobear wrote:
So if we don’t believe it, we’re off the hook? Cool!**
Pssst!! Gobear!! I know the back way into Valhalla! Man, they have the BEST mead ever! C’mon!
Well, I’ve already got a graphic novel and numerous other works of artistry lined up, along with school and a show, but… I’ll see what I can do!
Nuts to you all. The only important question here is: which side of heaven is hell on this week? I mean, that’s the coolest part: sometimes hell is off to the left from the Lord’s throne, and a little down, and sometimes off to the right, and a little down. Some have speculated that in Chick’s theology, hell actually orbits heaven, but more research is needed. That’s why these new tracts are crucial!
One of my favorite quotes seems rather applicable here: “The principal difference between heaven and hell is the company you keep there.”
[Oh, and Steve, I don’t think you’ll go to hell for the poly/cotton blends. Sans-a-Belt slacks, though, are a different story.]
Like most fundies, when he covers the story of Lot as an anti-homosexual rant (The Gay Blade), he leaves out the bit about Lot offering up his virgin daughters instead of the angels.
Righteous man, my skinny arse.
Guin,
What is the difference between Tarot cards and catholicism?
gex gex-what do you mean?
Well for starters, Tarot are not a religion…
In Catholocism you got those really cool looking saint cards which are kind of like tarot cards. Both are used to bilk money out of people but in Catholocism you get to keep the cards and they use some of the money for charity.
Haj