Carol the Waitress, Simon the Fag.
Ooh, I’d love to meet him. Or her. I have such a problem with pronouns.
[Daffy Duck:] Hold it right there! Pronoun trouble!
I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
Family reunions are about uniting the family, bringing together the young and old.
Police Officer: Jesus Christ, what happened to you?
Grace: In-laws.
Dad and his mysterious phone calls.
He was a degenerate’s degenerate. You won’t believe this, Mr. “Marmaduke”, but he used to call me on the phone sometimes, pretending to be other people. He actually thought it was funny!
I’d like to think that sometime, maybe 10 or 20 years from now, there’d be something I could laugh at… Anything.
Chic Johnson: How much do you charge for haunting houses?
Harry Selby: How many rooms?
This house has a way of playing tricks on you.
Come and play with us, Danny - forever and ever and ever.
We’ll find immortality together. They’ll remember me through you.
I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying .
Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.
He’s dead. I’m crippled. You’re lost. Do you suppose it’s always like that? I mean war.
This war was not started for your private gratification, and you can be damned sure it’s not being run for your personal convenience, either!
What is that you’ve got written on your helmet?
“Born to Kill”, sir.
You write “Born to Kill” on your helmet and you wear a peace button. What’s that supposed to be, some kind of sick joke?
I think I was trying to suggest something about the duality of man, sir.
Sir, those numb nuts can’t even tie their own shoelaces.
The tall blond man with the black shoe…who is he?