I’m a new grandma, as of about a month ago, but I still don’t get excited about babies the way I do puppies or kittens. People at work ask me about the grandkid and I say, “Well, it looks just like a baby.”
Only from now on, I’m going to say, “Well, it looks just like a goddamn baby.”
Sounds like a great time for your Parkinson’s to act up
Wow, you people are lucky. Apparently, I have the sort of face that says ‘I hate babies,’ even though I really do enjoy holding them. However, I have also discovered that there is not good way for to ask someone to hold their baby without coming off as a creep. sigh
And if/when that’s not an option, keep your arms firmly behind your back, so they have to keep hold of the baby or drop it.
I flew to Phoenix last week to hold a baby. Of course, she leaked very little and still had that new baby smell. That helped. Also, her parents, exhausted though they were, whisked her away to change shirts and/or diapers as soon as needed. Between that and her sleeping like an estivating Cyclorana platycephala, she was easy to hold. Cute, too.
Is this a friends or a family occurrance? I only ask out of extreme nosiness.
I had a Ford like that. The smell is just off-gassing.
I say something like, “Can I give him/her a little cuddle?”.
I was quite emphatic that I didn’t want to hold my brother’s baby. I even put my hands up in the “stop” motion and backed away slightly. But then he put that baby against me and started letting go and uh, yep, I’m going to do my best to not drop that baby because he was sure as hell about to if I didn’t grab it.
But the look on my face combined with the dangerous way I sort of held it meant that baby was taken by someone else quite fast.
Thankfully he has never tried to make me hold a baby since.
You’re one of the lucky ones who somehow happened to miss the Kardashian showing her ass off to the world in the Paper magazine. That ass could hold a Volvo.
I envy you.
I don’t get people foisting their baby on others. Now, I’m definitely the “nothing on my facebook but pictures of my kid because I have the cutest kid in the world” type, but the only people I ever asked if they wanted to hold Eliana was if they were close friends (who are all people who are good with kids. And only after I got the vibe that they wanted to hold her).
Other than that, I don’t necessarily want anyone else to hold her. People are dirty. And they might drop her.
Also, it doesn’t help that I saw this music video when I was younger, so I’m definitely paranoid.
Sure, I’ll be glad to. Plenty of room in this unregistered van.
Really? I’m a fairly large 46 year old guy, and it’s a running joke with all the women in the office that if a baby is brought in, it needs to get handed over to me. I love babies, and one of the more tiresome aspects of the internet is the idea that pretending an exaggerated dislike of them is some sort of cool, mysterious detachment from petty human concerns. It doesn’t make you a moody but interesting loner, it makes you the adolescent sitting alone on the stairs at a party sighing with an secret aloof disdain for these trivial antics and secretly hoping that a girl will be entranced by your lofty, troubled solitude. Babies are cool.
Plus, I’ve had women tell me that holding a baby makes a guy look sexy.
This didn’t happen to me on the internet. It was at a family holiday party. YOU hold the goddamn baby, then.
I love you.
My babies are big now, else I’d let you hold them.
Awwwww!!! The squidgey whooshems izza cutie ittle sweetums yezzie is!!! Yezzie is!!!
Just shut up and pass him down. There is never any shortage of willing arms for a newborn.
That ship has long since sailed for me.
People used to try to do this to me all the time, as if just holding something smelly and sort of alien looking would suddenly make me want one of my own.
Not wanting to hold something that is being forced on you is hardly misanthropic.
I had one of these - not quite that bad because I was sitting down, but because I didn’t believe my cousin would actually drop the baby, he landed in my lap, much to his disapproval. Then she got mad at me.
Never visited Ohio, I see.
If they’re below room temperature, you might be doing something wrong. :eek:
None of you are holding my baby so don’t worry about it. This was a real pain in the rear a few years ago when I had an actual baby and a block full of mothers who realized their own kids were growing up and their ovaries were calling out for another one. My baby was the toast of the block. I was happy to accommodate all but the neighborhood anti-vax loon who was politely told that the baby was asleep every time she happened to appear on my door.