As seen on a sign on the Salvation Army in my town.
As my friend aptly snapped, “Oh yes, all the fighting in the Middle East would stop right this minute if everyone there just embraced Jesus.”
This is probably the sentiment that pisses me off the most. Yes kids, every single problem, no matter how complex, can be fixed with Jesus! War that won’t end? Inject a little Jesus into the mix and watch those doves fly! Unbefuckinglievable scenes of slaughter in crushingly poor countries? Well, they don’t have enough Jesus there. Problems in predominantly Christian countries? It’s those dangblasted nonbelievers. Or, alternately, our Christian community has minor altercations, while your Godless neighborhood has deep-seated rivalries, confrontations and could use a little Jesus.
If I had a dollar for every time I heard someone say something like this, I’d drop out of college and go ballooning around the world.
I had a lot more insults lined up for the sign, but then it occurred to me that the sign could be an ironic musing on what it’s like not to be a Christian in a backwater shit crater like the one I’m living in. “No Jesus? NO PEACE FOR YOU!”