“You remember I said I’d virtually kill you last? I virtually lied!”
If you virtually lied, does that mean you were telling the truth, or is there another meaning to lying about lying? Confused.
(Seems weird to be posting normal stupid shit all the while that kid is in that Alabama bunker)
Mmmmkay then. Buh bye.
You think we actually fucking care?
No. No, I don’t believe there’s a single entity on the entire face of the internet that actually gives a shit whether what’s-his-name remains subscribed to SDMB or not.
Which is sad, that whats-his-name thinks anyone cares, and double-sad that nobody actually does.
I actually do. Good luck to you. 
One day you’ll hit retirement age, have endless hours on your hands, and regret this day. Not that it affects me in the slightest.
I’ve never forgotten the first time I busted your cherry flavor. When come back, bring Plus.
Take it easy and be well.
I’m taking the tape dispenser and the power strip.
See you tomorrow.
I rarely say, “What he said”, but my friend lieu nailed it.
Here’s something to consider: Say one of your threads is discovered, one of our Dopers adds a comment which calls for an answer from you, the OP. I hope you’ll at least consider lurking and dropping in from time to time. In other words, don’t burn your bridges. 
Bye for now.
Quasi
Well, I hope whatever you go on to is awesome for you. Hope you’ll drift back in sometime in the future, and tell us all about it. If you do, we’ll be right here!
See ya!
Darn, I hate when we lose posters. I do appreciate your letting us know though. I worry!
Best wishes to you. Be well.
That’s what you think. One email to TubaDiva, and you’re back…
I love The SDMB. Tearful exit posts are greeted with the same genuine compassion as wide-eyed introduction posts!
I didn’t see any tears.
True. Although to be fair, this happens all-too-frequently in IMHO, too.
He who is tired of a 31-page thread about refusing to move seats in the cinema…is tired of life.
I marvel at the grey zone some people find themselves in. On the one hand, they don’t have the willpower to just not post. No drama queening about it, no asking for a ban, nothing. Just don’t post. But that’s not an option for some people.
The part I don’t get is that while they don’t have enough willpower for that, they do have the willpower to not form a new account when something comes up that they want to say. A minuscule effort, barely more than what it takes to just stop posting so damn much, yet there it is. What is it that puts that just out of reach? Fear of breaking the no sock rule? The extra eight seconds to validate the account? Do not get.
I’d say both are greeted with as much genuine compassion as they deserve. 
Sorry to see you go, Alka Seltzer. If it’s not for you, it’s not for you. Best wishes in all your future endeavours.
Goodbye. A little less drama in your goodbye post might have been nice, but, oh well.