For godsakes, it’s a fucking message board, it’s not a relationship. You punch a bookmark, browse the thread titles to see if anything interests you, and if not, you move on to your stupid ILURVESCATZLOL.com page or whatever other lame site you visit to avoid doing actual work (because we’re all procrastinators, that’s why we’re here).
If you don’t care to ever come back, then just don’t. What’s the point in announcing it? What kind of masturbation is that? Chances are no one remembers who you are anyway — or even cares, for that matter. What do you want? Anonymous people on a MB to beg you to keep lurking? It’s asinine.
And if you’re doing it because you think you’re protesting something, bullshit. Request to be banned then, then I’ll believe you’re sincere. Maybe.
ETA: Linky here, to one of many examples I’ve seen on this board over the years.
Every now and then I’ll feel the need for a break, after some span of time checking in every day for most of the day, posting left and right and having what passes for fun to me. Once the fun begins to fade I’ll cut back on my activity and find something else to do, usually online somewhere.
During football season (late August - early February) if I check in at all it’s mostly to see the Death Pool and any other threads on hot (or urgent) topics.
When I decide to stay away I just don’t post. That leaves open the option of coming back whenever I feel like it. If I have been absent for a prolonged period I will find (it’s happened a few times) by way of a vanity search on my username if and where I have been mentioned, and if that warrants an explanation or an answer to some question I will respond.
Otherwise, I sense that my presence is a lot like all but a few of the really heavy users here, responded to if I have said something of interest, or not responded to if I haven’t. I don’t take either of those actions personally. As I see it, the huge number of people posting here, some for going on ten years (maybe longer), keeps the forums full of interesting things to read and contribute to. Only the really indispensible types are truly missed for any length of time. If I had to guess, I’d put that number at less than 20. And I can’t even name them.
But I do have my favorite Dopers and if I have been away for a while, I’ll try to find if they’re still active. Now and then a real favorite won’t show up for a while. My first assumption is that they’re just taking a break, too. If I find evidence that something bad or drastic may have happened to them, I will feel a real loss. Fortunately, most of my buddies keep plugging away with clever, witty or downright funny things and that tends to brighten my day. All in all, I like this place.
I quit once, for about two years. I didn’t mention that I was leaving, I just stopped posting. Then two years later, imagine my chagrin when I came back only to find out there hadn’t been a mass suicide in protest and that the place was still actually running without me.
I do, I’ve met several dopers at some Dopefests, and consider them my friends. Besides that, there are a few that I haven’t met, personally but have talked with outside of this board. If that were the case, I’d PM them, or send them an email, and It’d be nice to receive something likewise if the case were reversed.
Also, “This place sux! Cya later, fuckers!” is far different than a hiatus, for whatever reason (extended vacation, something tragic in their lives, long hospital stay, etc.).
There’s no sense in announcing you’ll never be back, because I just don’t buy it.
Totally understood. Basically, for me, it’s don’t go away mad, just go away. If you need a break from the site, because it’s getting boring or mundane, then ease back. Fine.
I also agree about the heavy hitters, they’re the only exception. No need to name names, because everyone who’s been here long enough to care about them, knows who I’m talking about. They, themselves know they are large and well-known dopers (yes you do… don’t be modest), and I would be grateful for a public message from them as to why they feel they’re going away forever. But for semi-lurker’s like the rest of us, there’s no need. I can, should and do recede or become as prolific as I wish, without a public decree.
Again, I don’t buy the “I’m never coming back again” routine. When it’s as easy as clicking a bookmark in a moment of boredom, what’s stopping you?
Like Knowed Out said, it’s attention whoring. And look, I’m all for attention whoring, but at least be honest about it, and don’t make it self-limiting. That’s just idiotic.
I would like to use this thread to take the opportunity to announce that I’m leaving.
I’ve had many good times here over the years and made many good friends but I don’t like the direction the board is taking and it is with great sadness that I now have to say that I will not be posting here any more.
Thank you Straight Dope and may I wish you and all who post here the best of luck in the future.
Whenever these brouhahas flare up there is always a few people saying “You’re all complaining but almost nobody is really going to leave over this” so maybe some people just want to loudly say “Well **I ** am”. That doesn’t have to be interpreted as attention whoring.
I once quit another message board…for personal reasons, nothing to so with the board but my life got really grim and serious for a few years and I didn’t feel like sharing so I took a two year break-- I just went away because I didn’t even feel like explaining my situation
Imagine my suprise when I decided to start lurking again and almost immediately stumbled on a post where someone was missing me and wondering about my long absence. Pure coincidence but quite an ego boost.
Its the grown up equivalent of “fuck you guys Im going home/telling my mom”.
Well maybe not that grown up.
And I was gonna write this huge post on how messageboards are all about relationships and gessellschaft and gemeinschaft and negotiated identitys but… that would be admitting Id studied sociology.
What the hell is this “request to be banned” bullshit? If you’re protesting the fact that you can’t call Ed Zotti a cunt, then just post a thread titled “Hey, Ed Zotti, you’re a ____” (insert obvious last word), and the banning will take care of itself.
I don’t mean to try to instigate anything. Personally I think deliberately getting yourself banned is stupid. But if you’re going to do it, doing it by politely requesting to be banned is lame as fuck.
I think it’s 2 parts: HEY EVERYBODY LOOKY HERE… I AM CREATING DRAMA! LOOK AT ME!
1 part: I’ve been here a long time, some people I consider friends and I’d hate to never see them again… so I’d like to at least say goodbye and make sure I am reachable somehow.
