This freedom is available to all. Including those of us that do not want to be solicited by Jehova’s Witnesses. They are notorius for showing up every weekend, if not more often.
Everyone has a “how I got rid of them” story. Only the faces change, the stories never do.
So at one point I got really tired of this (IMHO) harrassment. I chased (literally) several of the elders of the local temple down. They were on a small road, I was in a big truck. I was exceedingly angry with them. They told me how to ensure no more visits from their members. Here goes:
Each member signs out a little card, very similar to the old style library cards, one for each neighborhood in a given area. This is so that there is no overlapping when canvassing an area. Ask the member when they come to your door to take out that little card. Note their look of suprise (you the uninformed should not know of this, the look says). Have them write on the back of that card your name and address as a “Do Not Visit”. Insist on watching them while they do this, or else they will just smile and nod at you and go away and not do it.
This tells the next member who checks out that card not to go to your house. This is usually good for up to 2 years, at which time they will check back at your address to see if you have moved. I have used this in the last 3 states I have lived in with great sucess.
If you are a JW, this is not meant to offend you.
I struggle every day to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
Once I answered the door, and 2 ladies just stood there smiling at me. Obviously they knew I didn’t know them, so I figured it out, and said Are you JW;s? They said yes. So I said I’m busy, come back again! They didn’t!hmmmmm
Last time they came to my house, my husband invited them in and talked their ears off (for hours) about theology and such. I think they put us on the bad list, because they haven’t been back since!
He’s also been known to invite in door to door politicians to talk about their policies.
Hmmmmmmm
Zette
Love is like popsicles…you get too much you get too high.
First, about half the board knows that my wife and I are very active, committed, and enthusiastic Episcopalians with strong backgrounds in Biblical studies and theology. Imagine their surprise when they come in to witness and we witness to them about why they should become Episcopalians, countering all of their arguments with the background from the Bible. I think our card is logged “Don’t stop there; they’re weirdos!”
Second, when we had the boys staying with us, two of them were home while we were out, and Jay answered the door.
“Hi, I’m NN, and I’d like to talk to you about Jesus.”
“Hi, I’m Jay, and I’m a Satanist. Come right in!”
They left.
Heh, Heh,
I knew there was a story in each of us. As I said earlier, only the faces change!
What I wanted to make clear in my previous post, is that there is a way to end to visits completely for up to two years at a time.
That is, unless you actually like to witness to them, or mess with them in some other way.
I struggle every day to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
When they come up and ring your doorbell, tell them the sign reads “No Soliciting” If they protest, simply state, "yes you are soliciting, you are soliciting your God.
If they further protest ask them to kindly ask God to forgive you because you are about to get out your high powered rifle for refusing to see that they are soliciting their God on you.
(I did do this, although I added in the rifle thing for further affect)
I usually invite them. The last time two missionaries came to my door, they concluded with the comment “You just want to argue” and left, despite my protests that I was eager to continue our theological debate.
The lst time I had any religious solicitation, it went something like this:
Them (Mormons, actually): Hello, may we have a moment of your time to share the good news of our Lord Jesus Christ?
Me: No thanks, I’m Wiccan.
Them: Uh, excuse me?
Me: I’m a witch.
Them: Oh. Have a nice day!
They left. Quickly.
I should add that while I’m not really a witch, I am a pagan. I just thought that telling them that I was a witch might be a bit more effective. Must have been, seeing as how they didn’t even offer me any literature.
Changing my sig, because Wally said to, and I really like Wally, and I’ll do anything he says, anytime he says to.
a woman came to my door and handed me a copy of watchtower.
and i cornered her
i asked if it’s true that JWs believe that only 144,000 people will going to heaven.
she said “i believe what the Bible says”
i said “NO, you believe what someone told you the Bible says”
Do…you…believe…that only 144,000 people are going to heaven?"
she said “yes”
i asked “about how many J.W.'s are there in the world?”
she said “i don’t know, 6 or 7 million”
i said “well, then you’re done then aren’t you? can’t you count!?!”
I was 16 years old and the 2 cutest guys came to the door, well as the pubescent teen that I was I stood there and talked to them for a good hour. They told me all about their religion and why I should become a mormon etc…etc…etc…blah…blah…blah.
Anyways, they left me all this reading material and stuff and told me they’d be around in a week. When the mormons returned it was a older couple. My dad gave back their reading material, and gave them hell for allowing their members to spend so much time talking to an impressional young girl…he stressed the young!!
I had a couple guys knock on my door a few weeks ago (don’t know if someone let them in or if they live in the building) from, I think they said, some Baptist church (I didn’t know Baptists went door to door…). First thing they asked me was if I died tomorrow was I sure I was going to Heaven. I told 'em yeah I was and I wasn’t interested.
Your Official Cat Goddess since 10/20/99.
“I’m a god. I’m not the God–I don’t think.” --P.C.
The munitions expert where I used to work related this story: while cleaning one of his revolvers, he heard a knock at the door, so he took his (unloaded) weapon with him to answer it. Standing there were two women with bibles open. After about a minute of conversation, one of them asked him, “Do you know what to do about crime?” He smiled, held up his gun, and responded, “Sure. One of these right between the eyes.” Their eyes got real wide, and they backed out of there as fast as they could git. He hasn’t been bothered with solicitors since.
“You can observe a lot just by watching.” – Yogi Berra
When my husband was a teenager, some JW’s came to the door at his family’s farm. Being the friendly type, he made conversation and stood there and talked with them for awhile. His dad, the definition of curmudgeon, came in from the fields and saw this going on. He stalked up to the front door, growled, “My son doesn’t need God, he’s got me,” pushed my husband inside, and slammed the door in their faces.
They didn’t come back
Last year there was a major push by Jews for J to hand out their materials in the New York City subway system. Every time I encountered them, I’d say, “Oh, sorry, I thought you were Christians for Mohammed. Do you have their phone number by any chance?”
“Sherlock Holmes once said that once you have eliminated the
impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be
the answer. I, however, do not like to eliminate the impossible.
The impossible often has a kind of integrity to it that the merely improbable lacks.”
– Douglas Adams’s Dirk Gently, Holistic Detective
When I lived in North Carolina, some Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormons or Moonies came to our door asking to discuss religion. One of my roommates said: “Sure, we’re just getting ready to shoot some smack. Want to do some with us?”
We were never bothered again.
(And, no, we didn’t do any heroin. Alcohol, reefer, cocaine, pills were another story)
I’ve never had JWs or Mormons come to my door, but I have had the lcal baptists come. Standing at the door holding the collars of a German Shepherd and a doberman, I spoke with them politely, explaining I was a devoted Catholic who attended Mass 2-3 times a week. When as a aparting shot they used that " Are you sure you’re going to heaven?" line, I told them I liked the element of doubt, it kept me on my toes. I hate self-righteousness.
