So that’s the problem. Working Class Oaf stole a piece of Sat on Cookie’s prize collection of shits that look like famous celebrities. In that case :mad: on Working Class Oaf. I’ll just bet it was the one that looked like Mother Theresa on one end and the Pope (JPII) on the other. It was the world famous Holy Shit!
sorry…I couldn’t help myself. I tried to hold it in but the cramps overcame my bad joke sphincter strength 
Me, too.
Unfortunately, I work from home.
E.
This would be a very funny thread if SoaC wasn’t serious, but since I assume she is, I think she is just sad.
A poop thread just isn’t a poop thread without lieu.
Shat on a Cookie? :eek: :eek:
The next time I am advised to “go shit on a roof”, I will keep in my kindest thoughts this noble pioneer who paved the way.
If you’re told to “go shit on a roof” and then to “eat shit”, you’d be eating that infamous delicacy “shit on a shingle”.
Welcome to the SDMB, EleventyOne. I think you’ll shit in…err…fit in quite nicely here. Your post brought to mind one of the finest threads ever produced on the Dope–Troy already linked to it, above. Great minds, and all that.
And just for the record, when I get the urge to go #2, I have to go ASAP. I can hold out for as long as it takes to get to the nearest bathroom, but that’s about it. As my brother, the esteemed Billdo once said, “You can’t fight peristalsis.”
Which brings to mind the classic quote from Full Metal Jacket:
If BVM took 15 minutes, would Shat on Cookie have a shitfit?
I’ve currently got a guy reassembling my shit-damaged flat ( no kidding, the flat above had a toilet that blew out, sending a raging torrent of “black water” flooding out my ceiling and down my walls, requiring all of my bathroom and hallway walls and ceilings to be ripped out and treated, a situation complicated by asbestos ) and he generally comes over when I’m at work. He’s there for several hours at a stretch and I fully expect him to use the bathroom and help himself to sodas in the fridge.
Last week I came home at ten p.m. to a backed-up toilet and an apologetic message on my answering machine about it. I was slightly annoyed, yes, but only slightly. There was not much he could do about it, really - I keep my plunger, snake and other de-clogging paraphenalia in a locked storage area outside and I would hardly expect him to go buy one just for the one job. So I sighed, grumbled under my breath about the injustice in the world, got my plunger and cleaned up the mess. Life went on.
It’s just not that big of a deal. Anybody so rude as to refuse somebody the use of their bathroom because of their oh-so-delicate sensibilities, needs to get a fucking grip. I’m usually not one to pile on the third page of a backfiring pit thread, but sweet lord.
Would we call it the Immaculate Defecation?
Damn!
Is that ALL lieu has to say on the subject?
I knew a thread like this would bring you out, but I was looking for a classic “send that dead sea dragon, (in an advanced state of decay), down the Ganges!” kind of statement.
This is a little better, but still not quite up to, (heh heh), snuff.
Yer slippin’ dude!
I haven’t laughed at this many poop jokes since I was eight. I’m starting to remember what I liked about being eight.
well, I don’t know if it’s “common”, but like Matt, unless I’m sick, I usually have no trouble waiting.
That’s a relief. I was thinking I’d have to register as a mutant.
At least we wouldn’t be offending SOC with our crude working class poops. We’d have the “class” to wait til we got safely home.
Perhaps the wallpaper really did peel off this time :eek:
I’m with Sat on Cookie. Next time some lowly peon absolutely must enter my palace for some vital task, if he even deigns to look longingly at my toilet I shall have his fucking head on a pike in my front yard. All who pass by shall tremble and fear my wrath! No base shit shall defile my porcelain shrine! Only the most flowery feces shall enter that holy place!