cough Shouldn’t that have been The Talented Mr. Limpet?
The Ninth Plate: A shady chef searches for a place setting supposedly used by the Devil himself.
**Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Six, But were Afraid to Ask: ** The latest installment in the Know Your Numbers series.
Si.:smack: (Or, The Incredible Mr. Ripley
NINE- a romantic comedy about Tiger Woods’ sexual partners during a wild weekend. (No one under 17 admitted.)
Bang The Tin Drum Slowly - Little Eddie Gaedel refuses to grow up until the St. Louis Browns win the pennant.
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hard On - Life on the 2009 PGA Tour.
Brian’s Executioner’s Song A terminally ill man wants his best friend to kill him.
Foxy Mrs. Brown: Queen Victoria and her favorite valet go undercover to avenge Prince Albert’s death.
What’s Up? Tiger’s Willy - Woody Allen redubs the movie The Legend of Bagger Vance.
Tammannie Hall: A neurotic loser falls in love with a corrupt politician
You know, I’d pay to see this. I see a somewhat cheesey ‘Historical figure with hidden adventures’ kind of thing. Maybe add some steampunk elements to make up for the lack of disco fashions.
Though what I’d really like is Jackie Mrs. Brown, as a Queen Victoria of a certain age, who despite her hidden adventurous past, has been beaten into a world-weary and cynical woman by the pressures of having to keep up the appearance of a ruling monarch. Now with a reason/opportunity to go back underground into a dismal London underworld (portrayed realistically, but with affection for Dickens and Holmes adventures).
Into the Wild One - A spoiled rich kid finds passion in the arms of a Fifties biker tough.
Apocalypse Sometime in the Next Three Weeks, Most Likely - Col. Kurtz, he procrastinates.
Boyz n the HMS Hood - Gangstas win the grudging respect of their Royal Navy shipmates during a thrilling hunt for a German battleship, but doom awaits them in the icy waters of the North Atlantic.
Missed Congeniality - An elderly elocution coach wishes that people were still polite.
Shave the Tiger - A philandering golf pro, an electric razor and a blonde-bombshell mistress with kinky tastes = a wacky good time for all!
Filth Element:
It’s a dirty job but somebody’s got to do it. Starring Mike Rowe.
Lode Runner;
Harrison Ford is trapped in a video game.
Carmeggedeon:
Los Angeles freeway at rush hour.
Gaydar Runner:
Is he or isn’t he?
Seinfeld Of Dreams:
Man builds exact replica of Seinfeld set in the middle of a corn field hoping the stars will show up and record a new episode.
Quentin Tarentino’s Stories of Dr. Seuss: Featuring Sam-I-Am L. Jackson: "Green Eggs And Ham, Motherfucker. DO YOU LIKE IT?
12 Angry Mens on Film - A jury tries to decide the winner of the GLAAD Best Motion Picture Award.
The Letterman Always Rings Twice - Illicit love affair puts the woman’s former boyfriend on a prosecutor’s Top 10 list.
12 Angry Men of a Certain Age: The jury spends all its time talking about its own problems.
Friday the 13th Warrior: Jason vs. Vikings!
Dark Knight’s in Rodanthe - Bruce Wayne takes a vacation on the Outer Banks, but can never fully escape his work.
A Digital Orange - The droogies get a horrorshow upgrade.
The Empire Strikes Back to the Future - Doc Brown and Marty McFly try to prevent Palpatine’s parents from ever meeting in the first place.
The Sound and the Fast and the Furious - The doomed Compson family of Yoknapatawpha County turns to street racing to spice up their lives.
Hess of the D’Urbervilles - Hitler’s top aide escapes from Spandau Prison and takes up an assumed identity as a minor British aristocrat.
Dawn of the Dad: A family man staggers around like a zombie until his first cup of coffee.
**Voyage of the Red Dawn Treader: ** It’s crewed by a bunch of …WOLVERIIIIIIIIINES!
Invasion of the Brody Snatchers: Adrian Brody had better look out. Alien pods are coming for him.
Dr. Doomsday:
Dr. Doom takes a day off.
Lite Knight:
Robin Williams stars as Bruce Wayne, comedian by day, vigilante by night.
The Great Brain Robbery:
Victor Frankenstein puts together a crack team to steal the most valuable brain in England.