If you’ve been waiting in a line, when you get to the counter have your fuckin’ money out and your mind already made up. Do not finish your cellphone conversation, then look at the menu and then start digging for you wallet, Or I Will Flog You.
Self-entitled asswipes who pass the long line of cars that are trying to exit the highway or merge onto another highway and force their way in at the last damn minute. They should be dragged out of their cars, flogged, and then flogged while hung upside down!:mad:
I waited my turn, why can’t they wait for theirs? I deal with this every damn day going to work and I’m at the point where I must look like Yosemite Sam with steam coming out of my ears.
Anybody notice that the only flogable offenses are those that involve thoughtlessness?
Is cruelty not worthy of punishment? Perhaps, on the contrary, a certain core of sadism is indispensable to a well-ordered society.
No, it’s just that unwarranted cruelty is a shooting offense. Thoughtlessness lets you get off with a warning.
A-fucking-men. Preach it, Brother/Sister!
With respect, I think you’re missing a point here. In the opening narration he says “In less than a year, I’ll be dead. (Pause) Of course, I don’t know that yet”. This creates an obvious contradiction - from what vantage point could he possibly assert that he’s definitely going to die and yet also assert that he doesn’t know this yet? And if he does, in fact, die… then who is providing this narration, and when? This is supposed to leave the viewer unsure and intrigued to see what follows, and how this contradiction will be resolved. There is the possibility that some part of what the narrator has said will turn out to be false, or turn out to be true in some unexpected way (like Macbeth not being able to be killed ‘by one of woman born’).
This is slightly different from knowing, for sure, that he is in fact going to die.
People who try to enter the elevator before others can exit the elevator.
Flayed alive, say I.
Yup, my very first post, and that’s how i chose to spend it.
And, blast!, forgot to show my Carefully-Chosen Signature!
O yeah, on topic… let’s see… people to flog… Ones that post replies to their own posts? No? What about rambling, semi-drunk replies?
(By the way, i’m a Just A Little Drunk at the moment, so who knows how this will read when it’s too late to edit it?)
This happens every day when I get off work, as I’m leaving as the day people are arriving. Every. Day. I know they’re not expecting the elevator to have anyone in it, but come on, don’t try to shove your way past me. I have now taken to shoving over little old ladies* as I try to egress the elevator. They shouldn’t look at me like I’m the one that has to move! I am moving! Out of the way, through you!
OK they’re not little, but they are old!
I nominate the guy in my office who thinks he doesn’t have to make more coffee because he went out of his way to leave two drops in the pot.
You have the perfect username for this thread.
For a topical example of a floggable offense, how about the people in our development’s parking lot who shoveled snow out of their parking spot – and into their neighbor’s spot, to avoid having to carry it a few feet. When they were caught and told to move it, they shoveled it into the next available open space – the freshly-cleared sidewalk. This was a 39.5-inch net snowfall, so we’re not talking an inconvenience to people without boots, we’re talking chest-high mounds of shoveled snow sealing off the public sidewalk AFTER it had been laboriously cleared (our association’s snowblower burned out its motor, so the sidewalks were hand-shoveled).
When caught at THAT, and told to move the snow out of the sidewalk channel, they shoveled it into a big pile on top of the trash can at the corner, making it unreachable. Thirty feet of blank, unused snowbank in either direction from the corner, and these clods had to choose the three-foot area that blocks a community resource…on their third try.
Being overly chivalrous or polite. Regular politeness is fine but when you are stopping everything for the purpose of being nice to someone else you are causing more harm than good. I hate this and wish people would just get the fuck on with what they are doing and not hold everything up for no reason.
Yesterday I got to the office and there were 4 men and 1 woman waiting for the elevator. I stood at the back of the group and watched the elevator doors open and the other woman in the crowd walked right into the elevator. Then the next two men both stepped forward. Realizing that the other was walking onto the elevator they both then stepped back and made the universal gesture for “after you” and looked at each other for a moment. Then they looked around and saw me standing behind the other two guys and both obviously had the same thought, “Look, a woman! Let her on the elevator next!” I stepped forward to get on the elevator but because of their super politeness and determination to let someone else go first the elevator doors closed before I could get to them. Then the 5 of us waited for the next elevator while the first woman rode up in the other one all by herself. The security guard laughed at us the entire time we stood waiting for the next elevator.
He lives at my house, and also does this with milk, orange juice, and soda. I shall flay him for you.
When I’m driving, see a clear space, turn on my signal and proceed to merge into “your” lane, do not take this a sign that you should try to speed up so I can’t get over. I WILL come over anyway, and my mid nineties Cadillac is no match for your econo-box. Hell, it’s no match for your suv, either. Also, you will be flogged.
People who abandon puppies because “they’re not working out”. People who dump dogs in the country, because a Fluffy who has always had every meal from a bowl is going to fare so well on his own. Plus what everyone else has said.
StG
Eh, it’s not that deep. It’s pretty clear that the narration is hit-you-over-the-head foreshadowing. The purpose of it is that you want to find out how and why he’ll be dead.
Good one, but for me, that crosses over into the “should be shot outright” instead of simply “should be flogged” category.
Dogwalkers who don’t pick up their precious mutt’s poop.
My dad once confronted a guy who’s little dog left a BIG pile of crap on his lawn. He told the guy to pick it up and the joker said he had no bag. So dad got him one, and when the jerk still seemed reluctant to deal with the matter dad said he’d do it, then follow the guy home and throw it on his porch. Dogwalker picked up the crap.
Yeah, I’d flog them myself for that, or better yet find out where they live and take a dump on their front lawn.
People at the airport luggage carousel that have to crowd the front until their luggage arrives, instead of hanging back til they see it.
The whole family and friends that do the same thing for one piece of luggage.
And, the people who let their children play on the carousel… Maybe even hang them.
Here’s a question: Do you think that a good flogging would help inconsiderate people realize the error of their ways?