Another vote for grandma’s dress. I was expecting not to like it, then clicked the link and went “wow!” You absolutely look slimmer in that one than in the store-bought one.
Definitely investigate what the cost would be for alterations on grandma’s (and I wouldn’t do much to it–tuck the sleeves in a bit, maybe), and then base your decision on that.
I think they are both beautiful dresses that look great on you. As someone who looks at a lot of wedding dresses, I love that you found a modern wedding dress with sleeves!!!
For me this would be the deciding factor: Do I want to deal with the cleaning, alteration, and restoration of a vintage dress that is also a family heirloom? Because that’s something that has a non-trivial chance of taking up way more time and energy that you expected — and I realize someone else will do the alterations but you’ll still have to find that person, do fittings, worry over if they did the alterations correctly, etc. Personally I wouldn’t have had the time or mental energy for that, but if you do then I think it will be a great detail to add to your wedding.
Also: I spilled a chicken kabob down the front of my dress, so if you wear Grandma’s dress then I think there is some merit to changing for the reception.
Well, I do have until October, so it’s not like it’s some huge effort that’s competing with a million other things. Once we get this caterer thing nailed down I won’t really have to worry about much for a little while.
First, congratulations on your engagement. I must have missed it back a month or so ago when you announced it. I’m happy that you found the right person.
At the end of that thread you said:
Was that the store bought dress you posted a pic of in the OP of this thread?
You only get married once…or twice. So enjoy the day for you, your fiance’, your parents, etc. It’s a time to celebrate…so you want to look good, because you’re the belle of the ball! Sounds like it’s going to be a pretty big shin-dig with 250+ guests, so you will want to look your best, and pay homage to whoever you want to. WRT the dress, you’re only going to wear it once, so don’t worry too much about it being sturdy etc.
I’ve posted this before, my first wife’s wedding dress cost about $300. My second wife’s dress cost around $5,000, more than my entire first wedding cost. Both days are very special memories to me. What matters most is what’s gonna make you feel the best on that day. It’s your day!
I don’t think there’s anything cringeworthy about the style of the store-bought dress, but it is as you say “garden variety”.
As others noted, Grandma’s dress is more slimming. The store-bought makes you look, well, stocky but well-contained. Grandma’s dress: well, it won’t hide any bulges you might develop if you’re careless about food / exercise, but with the appropriate shapewear I think it would look stunning. I love the champagne coloring, also.
The tiara you linked to: Wickedly expensive. I’d bet you could do a lot better on your own, just using that photo. Admittedly the thing does have some pricey ingredients (freshwater pearls, sterling wire etc.).
Oooh - if you do wear Grandma’s dress and need to have it worked on, look carefully for a seamstress who is experienced in working with real silk. You don’t want a drycleaner’s hired help ruining it.
Yep, that’s it.
If you wear Grandma’s dress (which I love, sleeve, neckline and all) is the extra $320 really lost? Have you tried asking if they would apply it towards working on Grandma’s dress?
That’s a good question and one that had not occurred to me.
A bit late to the party, but count me among those who prefer grandma’s dress. Don’t get me wrong, both are wonderful dresses that look great on you. So you can’t go wrong either way.
But there’s something really gorgeous about you in grandma’s dress that I don’t see in the other dress. Also, it is a unique dress and the store dress is not.
I really thought I’d vote the other way before opening the photos. I’m not normally into the vintage thing and I’ve seen it look really cheesy. That’s so not the case here. You look stunning in grandma’s dress. Really stunning.
:: pouts, considers just deleting post but recklessly hits ‘submit’ ::
No offense - when you said that my brain took it literally, and “alterations” aren’t something that’s included in all that money! It’s access to the “great seamstress” for alterations. Welcome to the Wedding Industrial Complex. I didn’t miss your post!
So… they charged you a small fortune, for quite literally NOTHING???
Egad.
I think you should go with Grandma’s dress - it’s way prettier, and much more flattering to you. And what’s this about losing weight? I think you look great in that dress.
The store dress is totally forgettable - but Grandma’s - looks like a memory to me. And there is something special about the history attached to it, and wearing a dress that has such good “vibes” has gotta bode well for the wedding.
Two further questions - did your mum wear this dress (why / why not?)
It’s too early to ask - but any chance you would get your own daughter to wear it - 'cus that would be totally awesome!
And I further think the sleeves look just fine.
I’m sorry to say it, but I think you totally got robbed on that deal!
But thanks for not ignoring me. 
I felt like a total prat as soon as I posted, too.
It’s called the Vera Wang showroom, hello?
Well, they do store the dress for you, and give you a discount on anything else you buy there (my matrons of honor found very expensive dresses there, so that’s not nothing) and steam everything for you and so on. But basically, for the insurance that your cat won’t pee on your dress, yeah. I dunno, you get caught up in this stuff.
And no, my mom didn’t wear this dress. My mom got married in 1978, which is probably just long enough to make the style of my grandma’s dress really repellent at the time. 
I tried on her dress just for the hell of it - it’s actually not terribly dated, considering when it’s from, but it’s way too small for me (to my great surprise - I’d have thought she and Grandma were about the same size, and Mom was a LOT older when she got married) and very, very polyester. Very. Also it has embroidered daisies.
ETA - actually, probably my mother didn’t even know we had this dress when she got married. She only found it hunting through Grandma’s closet looking for some tax forms years later when my grandparents were in assisted living. “What’s this, Mom?” “Oh, that’s my wedding dress.” It’s been living in a Kaufmann’s box for 70ish years.
So, yes, the dress has never left the store? Have you asked about returning it?
No returns on discontinued dresses.
In amusing news, we did go ahead and pull the trigger on the bridesmaids’ dresses, and I’ve been looking around for vintage brooches to give them as attendant gifts and wear like the pin is shown on the (angry vampire) model on the website. I also have a bridesman, and I figured it would be nice if I found him one too, and he could wear it as a boutonniere to indicate that he belongs with us. This one came up.