Commandment 11:
Thou shalt not put the smack-down on the Lord thy God.
This was one of Weird Earl’s links a while back.
http://www.christslove.com/cl1.htm More Jesus on the web, including Our Savior http://www.catholicsupply.com/christmas/basketball.html in sports and Betty Bowers.
Weird Earl’s archives are a treasure trove. Periodic perusals are highly recommended.
I’m trying hard not to laugh out loud, so my eyes are tearing up. I haven’t had this problem since Cranky’s onion rings thread.
I have just had a vision of Jesus trying to do the 200m hurdles while wearing an ankle-length white robe and hippie sandals.
I am so going to Hell.
“Just a hunch, but I’m guessing they’ll go for the Hail Mary play again…”
A friend of mine found that picture and added a caption something like, “Who’s your Saviour? Say it and you get the ball back! Say my name!”
Actually, He used to be able to walk on water, but, ever since they made those holes in His feet…
It’s the captions that make seeing the collection here priceless:
If you think that’s funny, you guys need to visit:
Religious action figures, “Putting the ‘Fun’ in ‘Fundamentalism’.” Wonderful stuff.
Oh, you know the basketball one should be captioned, “You kids ain’t got no game! No game! BOOYA! THE SAVIOR DUNKS!”
Well, who else do you know of that had a three hours “hang time”? :eek:
First Commandment of Fight Club . . .
Screw it - you all know the rest . . .
FUNNIEST.
BLASPHEMY.
EVER.
Polycarp, I’m speechless. I can’t breathe and I think I pulled something in my eyes when they grew so wide.
That’s where I found out about these too! The ones I remember were Jesus sneakily stealing something from Derek Jeter’s locker, and Jesus sitting in an office chair playing solitaire on the computer.
Poly, if one day I met you, and you told me to sell everything I own, give the money to the poor, and follow you…
I probably would.
Sure, Jesus is a great role model and all, but… how do the Catholics reconcile that with the strong homoerotic pedophilic images of the baseball and football statues? Or the ballet, golf, and (especially) gymnastics statues that just SCREAM “molestation.” I dunno, I just found these to be creepy :p. Though I agree, the hockey one is funny :).
Seriously though, how could it possibly be any fun playing a team sport against Jesus? First of all, you know He’s going to be one of the captains; wouldn’t it just suck to NOT get picked by the Lord? (“All right!” says Jesus, “We’re gonna play some basketball! Sheep versus goats!”)
Second of all, Jesus is Perfect. If He can walk on water and rise from the dead, He should have no problem hitting nothing but net from beyond the three-point line. All the other team has to do is get the ball into the Lord’s hands and they’re guaranteed some points. (Can’t you just hear the kids? “C’mon, Billy, you moron, pass the ball to Jesus! PASS IT TO JESUS! JESUS IS OPEN!”)
That’s probably why the kid in the football statue is giving JC a cheap shot tackle before He gets the ball.
Some questions:
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When did ballet become a sport?
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Since when does ice hockey involve three teams? I mean, it’s not like Jesus is wearing the uniform of either of the other two teams.
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Will we see other “Bible action figures” in similar circumstances? Will there be a “Moses swimteam” figurine, showing him strolling up the middle of the pool? Will we see Nimrod basejumping? King David throwing the shot? St. Sebastian in an archery competition? The sky’s the limit, I tell you…
http://members.aol.com/JesusImages/
And it had to happen:
http://www.sortakinda.com/look/withyoualways.shtml
My favourite is the trucker… he looks like they’re about to run down someone’s pet or something. 
http://www.cheesyjesus.com/online-store/scstore/
Another one worth a good laugh.
No offense intended, of course.