I hereby issue a running-fuck-slap to myself (for those that don’t know, RFS is a few steps beyond a bitch slap)…
Here’s the scenerio, I’m lurking about SDMB, spec-ing out hardware on cdw, and building systems on dell.com (so what if it’s midnight, I’m still working, but atleast part of my time is SDMB)… Meanwhile I’m half watching a movie with my wife…
My wife says she’s going to bed, and asks “would you mind using the headphones” (a reasonable request)… “No problem” is my answer…
Well, there was a problem, I’m an idiot… so I go over to the entertainment center, turn off all four speaker channels from the tuner, turn the tv all the way down (we hadn’t been using the tuner’s speakers for the neighbors’ sake)… I then go back to my seat put on the head phones and turn up the tuner, nothing… I turn it up a bit more, nothing… I then reduce inline resistor on the headphone line, nothing…
Ok, something is not right… let’s go check the headphone plug… the cat pulled the plug out once again… I re-insert the plug and…
CRACK!!! [que very loud movie sound track]
A smart person would have thought to turn the volume down, oh no, not Bobo…
I swear, I think the headphones actually bounced off my head with the hit they put out (well not really, but it’s a nice visual)… so now I have a nasty ringing in my ears… I’m going to bed, hopefully my head will feel better in the morning…
Has anyone else done something so blatantly stupid they just want smack themselves?
I can’t believe I did this. I used a fork to get some stuck crumpets out of the toaster. After the lights flickered my husband runs out to the kitchen to see me standing with a startled bovine expression:
It’s for a corp account, they like the name and the 3yr next business day onsite…
I pesonally like dell (I have a dell tower and laptop myself)… I like my roll your own just as much, but that’s my roll your own, not just random shop on the corner’s roll your own.
Wow… I just hijacked my own thread. Woohoo, go me.
Once, I reached down to unplug a lamp, and the plastic cover for the plug came loose and slid up the power cord. So I reached down again, grabbed the unshielded plug itself, and gave myself a rather fetching Don King hair-do.
I used a knife to pry a stuck plug out of the socket. And I didn’t switch it off. After the loud CRACK and flying sparks, the knife had a nice semi-circular piece missing where the plug prong had melted the metal away.
I swore at myself for about 10 minutes after that.
My electric mixer cord fell out of the mixer and into a bowl of chocolate cake batter. I promptly fished it out, and licked the batter off the end (hey, it was CHOCOLATE!) What I neglected to do was unplug the other end.
I remember my then 3-year-old looking at me with the most curious expression on her face, then she said, “Wow, Mommy! Your hair went like THIS!”
Since I’m a self-proclaimed idiot for cichlids, I don’t necessarily consider being an idiot a bad thing. On the other hand, I’ve also managed to shut my head in a door and papercut my eye. :o
Now the bigger issue of course is what was ON the paper that cichlidiot was investigating soooooo intently that he/she managed to cut an eye with it. Confession-time cichy…
on my way to valiantly rescue my ohh-so-blonde girlfriend from the parking lot of her work where she had somehow locked her keys in her car i remembered that the CA lottery had reached some ungodly sum and decided to run into a local liquor store to throw away 5$ worth of hope…leaving the engine running i quickly bolted from my Buick only to return with my pockets empty…i had locked the door, the keys were in the ignition.
I’ve got “stupid” with a little “hopelessly spastic” mixed in.
One fine autumn day I decided to clean out my gutters. After a few attempts to reposition the ladder on soft ground I decided to just climb on the roof and pursue my rain diversion system maintenance project from there. Head down. Everything went fine until I got to the corner.
hmmmm… lemme see if I can come up with another one to keep it going (shouldn’t be too hard).
ok, here we go… way back in the day, one of my child type duties was scaring the gulls off the dock and boat… after a few months those damn birds had learned that I wasn’t much of a threat, I’d sprint down the dock screaming like an idiot, they’d fly away, circle for a while and promptly re-land… hmmm, that was cutting into my video game time, and to quote “the princess bride” ‘when all else fails, new tactics.’
So I started throwing rocks (I never actually hit them, so everything thinking “how horrible” can retract their claws)… The invisible hissing thing that went THONK (hitting the planking) made them fly away…
Well one day, I do my best Nolan Ryan impression, and made a solid contact… … … with my mom’s prized flowers (well the flower pot specifically)… BANG, SHATTER, SPLASH… whoops, by by birds, by by flowers, by by my car key privs. doh.
Young tlw wakes up late for the very first day of her teaching job (a profession I have long since given up) and realizes after showering that she cannot leave the house without shaving her legs. So she goes into the bathroom to do a “leg on the edge of the tub” shave job. All goes well with leg one…
I have a scar on the tip of my nose now, though.
Lesson learned: even though they’re called “safety razors” it is not safe to hold the blade toward your face when you use your shaving hand to hurriedly push your hair back out of your eyes.
Well, yeah, but look on the bright side. When you got to school that day you could tell your class you were in a knife fight (“And you oughta see the other guy.”) and those would be the best behaved kids in the world.
After smashing out the lightbulb and knocking various wires loose from the celieng fan, my dad decided that I needed to help him fix it. Understandable I was the cause. So as my dad was splicing wires back together I heard him mutter about not being able to see very well. Being the ever helpful child that I am, I turned on the light switch.
In some small way my subconsious was getting revenge for him talking me into grabbing an electric fence when I was 5.
Confession-time cichy…