Thursday I went shopping with a coworker. Among other things she bought a sheepskin rug.
Friday she told me she’d have to return it. Why? Because she’s allergic to wool…and hadn’t realized sheepskins would have wool content. :smack:
Next?
I recently got a new laptop and was disappointed with the location of the headphone jack. You see it was on the right side and the cord was getting in the way of the mouse. Took me about two weeks to realize that I could have the cord go around the back of the laptop and have it come from the left side. :smack:
I was cutting some vinyl siding with a utility knife (to install an outdoor electrical receptacle).
You’re supposed to use tin snips.
I just had surgery to repair two lacerated tendons and some severed nerves in my left index finger.
Use tin snips. And leather gloves. Trust me.
A man who was neither a student nor a faculty member but an aged alumni here for this weekend’s Homecoming Game walked into the library where I work doing reconaissance for bathrooms during the ballgame. He asked me if many people use the library’s restrooms on football Saturdays. I told him “Yessir, a good many… more probably come in here to use the bathroom than to study on football days.” He asked me if there’s ever a line and I told him, honestly, I’ve seen a line a few people long. He then asked me if I would reserved him a stall in the bathroom for about 2:30 p.m.- he’d be willing to pay me for my efforts. I chuckled because I thought he was joking. He wasn’t. (“Shit and get off the pot, buddy- this stool’s reserved!”)
I don’t feel quite so bad now about having cut my hand open on the elastic band of my panties.
That there is someone who’s “regular”.
The buses in my city have bike racks on the front. So I ride my bike from home to the bus, change buses at the terminal and then ride from the end of the second route to work.
One day last week, I was waiting at the terminal, when a guy walks by with an identical bike. He sees mine and says, “Hey, nice bike!” He continues on and puts his on the rack of the bus around the corner from mine. Then he comes back to talk to me about cycling. My bus arrives. I put my bike on the front, and get on. At the last minute, the other guy gets on my bus. I thought this was a bit strange, but said nothing. Then he realizes the bus is going in the wrong direction for him, and asks to get off at the first stop. He does, and starts taking my bike off the rack! I had to go ask him where he thought he was going with my bike. He looked at me like I was insane, and I explained to him that he put his bike on another bus. Then, he was all apologetic, and the bus carried on. He had to walk back to the terminal and wait an hour for his bike to get back from the ride around the city.
What a minute — someone injured themselves with a razor-sharp cutting implement and it makes you feel better about slicing yourself open with somethingdesigned to be worn every day* in direct contact with your naughty bits?*
Okay, I guess – so long as you feel better. 
That’s a serious pair of undies you got there.
How YOU doin’?
If things seen on film count, then this
NOT WORK SAFE
repeat
NOT WORK SAFE
and once more for good measure
NOT WORK SAFE
online clip is the winner. In case I haven’t mentioned it
THIS CLIP IS NOT WORK SAFE. But interesting nonetheless. (It’s also not pornographic exactly; think "really stupid kids emulating Jackass.)
That kid will live in fear for the rest of his life, worried that his mom might find out.
I’m glad there were no video cams when I was a kid.
Stupidest thing I’ve done lately: went to dinner last night with a friend (not the stupid part), and after dinner we decided to walk over to the bookstore and browse. A book had been recommended to me, but I’d left the note with the title and author at home. In the bookstore, we split up and I went to the history section, carefully reading each title to see if it rang a bell. After about ten minutes of searching, my friend came back over and asked me what I was looking for.
Me: “A book about a submarine and nuclear weapons and someone was trying to trick someone into thinking it was a different submarine or something and attack us so we’d attack them, and it has ‘red’ in the title. I can’t find it, though!”
Friend: “Do you mean ‘Red Star Rogue: the Untold Store of a Soviet Submarine’s Nuclear Strike Attempt on the U.S.’? It has a picture of a submarine on the front.”
Yes, folks, in systematically searching the shelves, I had skipped right over the shelf with about a billion copies of that book fronted out. Right in front of my face. Hundreds of them. Fortunately there were only like a dozen people around to see my idiocy.
Well, better as in not quite so much like a complete doofus. I’m pretty sure that brain surgeons and rocket scientists do not walk around with panty cuts.
I got panties that slice and dice. Come up and see me some time, big boy.
One day I cinder rock had somehow made it into the water pipes and had lodged itself in my bathroom’s water supply in my building, meaning I had almost no water pressure late at night. Since both my sink and toilet were stopped I figured it was just inside the pipe where they split to go to the two. Ho-ho says I, I’ll just removed the water pressure valve (without asking the manager to turn off water pressure which is a big hassle since it’s linked to the whole stack of apartments), use this snake here to push it out and then put the valve back on when pressure is restored. Surely there couldn’t be too much water coming through. As long as I have this bucket and a bunch of towels handy it’ll be cool.
I got one quarter of a turn into it before it struck me. :smack: This is really really dumb. In fact it’s a Calvin & Hobbes strip.
And in the end it turns out the cinder rock how been crushed to powder and was merely stuffing up the filter at the end of the faucet and the toilet innards. It took me only a few seconds to clean those out and fix everything.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
thanks for sharing that one made my day…
Why, would she tear him a new asshole?
Holy crap! :eek:
I think this clip wins, hands down. REALLY stupid kids…
Oh, they count all right!
That is one of the dumbest things i’ve ever seen. What the fuck was he thinking?
Definitely. Maybe if the poor kid had the sense to use a bit of KY, it wouldn’t have been so bad.
On the other hand, I’m pretty sure that most folks’ would clench up tight enough to keep a strangle-hold on a silicone-oil-coated hair, under those circumstances.
Yikes.