This will be a fight to the finish, combining all the best antics of Tom & Jerry, Roadrunner & Coyote, and Monty Python.
All are invited to join in!
(VB spits in his hands,rubs them together, and pulls out the Acme Trekkie Stomper Pat. Pend.)
Quietly sets up web-cam. Waits for violence to ensue.
You don’t mind if I cybercast this, do ya?
Hides behind tree. Awaits StrTrkr777.
Sneaking quietly up behind VB, purplebear gets ready to pounce on him with her Super Duper Trusty Acme Grappler, when suddenly she trips over a horny toad and falls on her face mere inches from her intended target.
OOOMPH!
<subdued groaning could now be heard coming from the general direction of her head, along with something that sounds like ‘that’s gonna hurt tomorrow’>
Luckily for Trkr, he has a couple of genius daughters and even though the oldest is only 3 1/2 years old, she has already developed a weapon that seems much like a phaser but can be set for different types of people. (Also, luckily, Trkr had the foresight to get her to add old retired flyboys to the list of folks it can be set for).
So, Trkr takes up his Weapon of unknown distruction and sets it to flyboy and fires.
Unfortunately, it was dropped earlier and the list got scrambled and it shot the Cybercaster and his cameras. Hey, you are not going to get out of showing this for free ya know.
Dang it, I must get my girl to unscramble this list.
Instead smacks VB on the head with the gun.
Jeffery
p.s. Why are you mad, you get PB first?
Sneaking quietly up behind VB, purplebear gets ready to pounce on him with her Super Duper Trusty Acme Grappler, when suddenly she trips over a horny toad and falls on her face mere inches from her intended target.
OOOMPH!
<subdued groaning could now be heard coming from the general direction of her head, along with something that sounds like ‘that’s gonna hurt tomorrow’>
GAKKK!!! I’ve been shot!!!
Looks like I’m gonna hafta open up my can o’ whoop-ass…
opens industrial-size can of spinach. Consumes. Wounds instantly heal and THespos grows to 5x his normal size.
Where is that Acme atomic-powered automatic apple-dicer? Oh…there it is.
THespos runs StrTrkr777 through a Rube Goldberg-esque machine. When he pops out the other end, he’s in 50 kajillion little pieces.
Neener neener neener!!!
Swatting at the little chirping birdies that are circling his head after Trekkies’ dastardly attack, VB uncrosses his eyes, steps over the prostrate Purp and invites Trekkieboy to sniff his lapel flower…
PS; I’m not mad; I just thought this would be interesting, especially as you started it… 
PPS: My youngest daughter has a 10 year head start on your oldest one!
Getting up, dusting herself off, purplebear picks up her SDTA Grappler, and sneaks up behind VB again. He’s distracted by trying to get StrTrkr to sniff his lapel flower, so she’s able to launch her Grappler on him. It catches him off guard, pins his arms to his side, and he falls to the ground, legs intangled in the rest of the Grappler. 
So there, flyboy!
But, before she can implement the rest of her dastardly plan, she is hit from behind by…
Obviously, it was Thespos, because VB is incapacitated and Trkr would never hit you.
Luckily my daughter has also invented a matter re-assembler and so I am restored from Thespos’s evil attack.
Look camera-boy if you want to get in this you had better be ready to get your butt kicked.
VB, I ain’t sniffing your flower. What kind of flyboy are you wearing a flower? What would your USAF friends think? I pretend to sniff VB’s flower and then I catch him with an uppercut to the jaw sending him into next week. (Guess I can rest for a bit.)
Jeffery
Ooh, I just love these! Anyone mind if I watch?
::: pulls up lawn chair…:::
You must be right, Trkr. Say, just had an idea. Come over here a minute. <whispers earnestly in his ear, surreptitiously pointing in Sunshine’s and Thespos’ directions>
What do you think of my idea? Cool! You go first!
How about a nice round of the “Anvil Chorus”?
ducks as anvils start falling…
VB get’s loose from the grappler, catches trekboy with a right cross, poinks him in the eyes ala Three Stooges, and finishes with a flying mare.
There. That’ll hold him for a minute or two.
Sits on a tree limb where she can watch the action, but not be seen by the participants.
VB catches his breath, sees a piece of popcorn fall out of the tree…
“What the…?”
He looks up into the tree and sees Smoothy…
A slow evil grin spreads across his face…
“hello there!”
Okay, PB. *Trkr sets his gun to the setting that jolts unsuspecting watchers of cartoonish fights. Takes aim in the direction of Thespos and Sunshine and fires. *
That ought to get them involved. Get 'em PB.
Jeffery
FedEx truck pulls up. “Package for THespos!”
Ooooh. Looky. It appears my Acme Grenade Launcher/Salad Spinner has arrived.
Stares menacingly at Trkr.
YARGH!!!
Hilarity ensues. Four explosions and three spins later, Trkr is a black lump of carbon on the floor.
While VB’s attention is on Smoothy, purplebear sneaks up behind him, and tackles him to the ground, where she proceeds to tickle him til he screams for mercy, then she lets loose the harmless ants into his pockets…
Sits back to watch him squirm…
Turning to Trkr, she smiles at him, and proceeds to turn loose her hive of angry bees directly at Sunshine and Thespos. Only to have several of them turn around and start chasing purplebear. :eek:
Running from the bees, she trips over VB and falls flat on her tush next to something slithering and hissing. Now afraid to move, purplebear waits to see what it is.
Giggling madly at VB and PB, Smoothy jumps down from the tree and picks up the water hose that had PB so scared. Turning off the water source, she then helps PB up and then assists VB in standing. Before they can turn on her, she shimmies back up the tree to enjoy the ensuing cartoon antics.
:I’m not helping VB with any ants down his pants…he’s got to deal with them himself:
Girlbysea grabs a blanket, cup of hot cocoa and looks for a comfortable chair… ok… continue…