The number of ways the human body can experience failures is spectacular; however, those failures rarely follow the timetable dictated by some silly fellow in a white coat.
That being said, this doesn’t seem like a “Wait around and hope the problem resolves itself” situation.
I hope someone more knowledgeable about navigating the dystopian hellhole that is the U.S. healthcare system can give you practical advice about how best to proceed …
ETA: you could start a separate thread in IMHO and see if any Dopers have good advice. It’s admittedly a smaller crowd than, say, Reddit … which might actually be another good crowdsourcing resource, on second thought.
Wow, small world!
I thought for sure someone was gonna comment about how the machines are already taking over!
I’d have the same sympathy. However, for me, the guilt would get me out of bed pretty much immediately, or after a suitable amount of grumbling, and then once potty time was done, I’d crawl back under the covers and THEN get in my reading/chilling time, guilt free.
No kidding; “energy vampire” is an excellent description.
sari try practicing saying, “Oh, mind your own business” in a firm but cheerful tone.
And since we’re all butting into your personal life with unsolicited advice, you can start with us. 
Predictably, “want to eat” does not equal “want to make” and I crapped out. Had some leftover noodles and called it quits; 3:30 a.m. after Long Night in a kitchen doesn’t exactly incentivise cookery.
I’m a minimalist with eggs: scrambled eggs get no cheese, no ketchup, just a bit of chives or green onions.
However, I keep a bottle of Cholula in the fridge solely & specifically for one-eyed Jacks. No other sauce will do, and when I first moved up here & didn’t have replacements for most of my condiments and made a Jack with no Cholula, it just tasted … incomplete.
But I don’t put any hot sauce on anything else.
Now, spicy chili crisp is a whole 'nuther beast, and I’m getting a bit notorious at work for my addiction to the stuff … because I always hafta bring in the jar so someone can open it for me, which means my consumption level cannot be kept a shameful secret.
I’m not much for multitasking, but you DO know you can derp around on your phone while seated upon the porcelain throne, yes?
About a dozen.
And yes, exactly, modified with holes for water bottle spouts, plus “windows” of 1/4" steel mesh, “sewn” into place with steel wire, for ventilation. I reinforce the water bottle holes with pop-tops (the little lever you open your Coke can with) as they are the exact size of the spout.
Those openings, unfortunately, provide them with places to start chewing.
Oh, they’d enjoy it all right … but I’d likely never see either ever again.
Or open a random cabinet eight months later and have a heart attack. (Pretzel is BIG.)
But they don’t ezzactly come when called, and can - and will - hide in the most bizarre spots. Getting outside the house would mean game over, and inside the house, well … to a cat, a snake is just a string that moves and wiggles all on its own, what fun!
Hey! 
At this particular job, it’s not piped in, thank gawd - we have those little Bluetooth speakers and take turns hooking up Pandora/Spotify/YouTube etc. via our respective phones.
I call it “playing D.J.” e.g. whoever’s in charge of music, as in, “Hey, whoever is playing D.J. can you turn it down a bit, please?”
(I’m the one playing endless Led Zep, Bon Jovi, Clapton, etc.)
But Sweet Manager loves Christmas music, and so does the girl for whom I made that card, so for their sake the rest of us grin and bear it.
Monkey was bored so I went to give him some catnip, and a big clump fell out of the bag.
Me: “the hell … ? Oh, that’s what entirely sober me I did with the ‘furry ball’ from JtheC!” I’d put it there to pick up some scent.
… right as Monkey POUNCED. So, @JaneDoe42 please know there is an incredibly happy black cat up in western Mitten State currently losing his absolute mind.
Furry ball + catnip + empty box (to contain the catnip mess) = OMG