DUCKofDEATH has already picked up a warning. I’ll bet he doesn’t last out the month.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=20615274&postcount=10
I won’t take that bet. His warning was for political potshots in CS, for calling Harvey Weinstein a “sleazy Leftist”. That’s fairly mild, which means the mods have their eyes on him and won’t cut him much slack.
Troll of the Day Rago just popped into IMHO with a run-on sob story. Guesses on how many bite?
Apparently, Borat just joined.
ETA: ninja’ed by silenus.
This new one is pressurized, too.
Can we keep it? Please???
I bit. God, I am so stupid! He sounds pitiful.
He’s supposed to sound pitiful. That’s what trolls do.
If we keep it, someone has to feed it. Can you promise to clean up after it, too? 
Aaaacckkk. Are you telling me people actually come on a message board just to get sympathy for their pitiful life and/or situation. I know, I know, I am kidding. I do want to believe these peeps, though! I have got to quit reading these posts. I am learning folks. Gimme time. I will be as cynical as everyone else.
It’s not cynicism, it’s skepticism. When folks on this board get burned by one person’s fake sob story, it doesn’t teach them that all sob stories are fakes. It teaches them to try to discern better, using common sense and stuff like that, the real ones from the fake ones.
And when a new poster’s first post is a sob story, experience has taught us that that’s a pretty good tell that the story, and probably the poster, are fake, and to tread carefully. I don’t much like it when every such story is greeted with derision and mockery, it should be sufficient to just let it alone.
I don’t know. I think we should look around a bit first. There are so many strays out there. Maybe we can find a nice climate change denier.
Ok, thanks. I was kidding about being a cynic. I know it’s a more seasoned poster who can pick out the duds.
I’m partial to the 9/11 truthers. What happened to the guy who only got suspended? Did he not come back? sad
Probably not a troll, but a pyramid crazy: http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=20617247&postcount=11. Those are always fun over a holiday weekend.
The original thread wasn’t too far out there, but this latest revival shows real loony potential.
A “huge MASER beam, shaped in a vortex” ? That is not trollery, that is comedy.
Everything’s better with a vortex!
I really think that there’s some strange attractive connection between disordered wild thinking and vortices. The number of wackos who get hung up on vortices seems way out of proportion. Why not get hung up on resonances or conservation of energy or ??? But no, “it’s a vortex” seems to be the go-to explanation for these folks.
This lazrum is an interesting case. Joined up 13 years ago, has made 6 posts in that time (half of them about adult thumb sucking) and just bumped a thread that hadn’t been posted to in 8 years.
They read too much Junji Ito.
The theory of the Great Pyramids as giant capacitors for storing electricity, flinging MASER beams in the shape of a vortex into the ionosphere and getting lightning bolts of electricity flung back at them, does make a certain amount of historical sense. One has to remember that among the innovations attributable to the ancient Egyptians that so enriched their lives were the toaster oven, the microwave oven, the electric can-opener, and the first primitive color TV carved out of granite. One can only imagine their frustration when all these wonders turned out to be completely useless because no one had invented electricity.
It wasn’t until the Fourth Dynasty of the Old Kingdom that Sneferu the Dim-Witted suddenly had an idea. “Hey,” he said, “why don’t we build some pyramids and use hydrogen ions to make some MASERs in the shape of a vortex?” So they did. And the toaster ovens came on, the can-openers whirred, and everyone was happy and content. Everyone, that is, except Sneferu, because the wiring in his own palace wasn’t done to code, leading to the calamity that historians have come to call the Great Fire of Giza for which Sneferu had to endure seven years of unrelenting wrath from his beloved Queen.
I think this kind of historical perspective lends a good deal of credibility to the giant-capacitor theory of the Great Pyramids. And it’s well established in modern electrical engineering that if you want to get the most power out of your giant capacitor, you should stuff the mummified remains of a deceased King into it, which certainly corroborates the veracity of the theory.