On Computers

Actually, a more appropriate title would be ‘On Over-Priced Pieces of Plastic With Some Silicon in Them.’ Or even better: ‘On 2,000 Dollar Calculators That Freeze Up When You Attempt to Adjust the Volume While Playing Solitaire.’ In other words, ‘On Cybermax Computers.’

It’s a screw up. Sure, at the moment it seemed like a good idea. Hey, it’s even got a CD burner. Cool. And a 32 gig hard drive with 16 MB of RAM. Plus a DVD player. What can go wrong?

So we buy a Cybermax comp. Two thousand bucks, wasted. I think the moment it received its hard drive it decided “Hey. I don’t have to be a cooperative computer. I’m a non-name brand. Let’s make Dell and Gateway’s names even better, shall we?” As soon as we hooked it up, which took a couple of hours, mind you, and connected to the internet, we discovered a multitude of problems.

We couldn’t stay connected for more than five minutes.

Whenever we hit Email, we got disconnected.

Whenever we sent an email, we got disconnected.

The internet goes horribly slow, even for dial-up.

We couldn’t download anything.

We couldn’t adjust the volume.

Now that we can adjust the volume, if we attempt to while playing Solitaire, it freezes.

The Blue Screen of Death appears at least twice a day.

Floppies always appear as unformatted when they quite clearly are.

After more than two hours of being on, nothing works at the speed it should.

DVD’s will not play.

Files cannot be converted.

Now we can download stuff, but we get disconnected a couple of kilobytes from it being completed.

We get disconnected and it refuses to accept the fact, meaning we must restart.

Diablo II, or any other RPG, will not play.

While playing a full-screen game, a secret operation to change the background goes on, resulting in an ugly cross-hatch design blinding you upon exiting the game.

MP3’s will not play properly.

At random times the arrows in shortcut icons turn to little red boxes, or little white X’s.

In fact, the only thing that works is the Update finder which tells me that, to fix all of these problems, I must download stuff, which I cannot do.

For everything to work would be convenient. For Cybermax not to have gone under so we might get some stuff fixed would be convenient. But guess what?

Surprise, surprise. It went out of business.

It dares freeze up, then complain about it when I have to press the Button of Doom (power button) to restart it. I’ve seen that ScanDisk screen so many times I’ve memorized it:

“Because Windows was not properly shut down, one or more of your disk drives may have errors in it. To avoid seeing this message again, always select Shut Down from the Start menu.”

How the bloody hell am I supposed to do that when the mouse won’t move? You may as well change the message to this:

“Because this computer is a piece of shit, one or more of your disk drives may have errors in it. To avoid seeing this message again, throw this useless lump of plastic in the trash can and demand your money back. If you cannot do this, go on a murderous rampage. You know you want to. Then buy a Gateway. You’ll be much happier.”

How I hate being able to truthfully say “My computer ate my homework” as an excuse for not having my essay done.

Dude, get a Dell.

16 MB of RAM?!? That seems like it would be adequate about six years ago, but not today. I don’t think many programs or OS’s will even operate on so little RAM anymore. I just got a new laptop with XP on it and I paid to have the RAM upgraded from 256MB to 512MB.

Exactly how old is this computer?
You say that it has 16 MB of RAM. I know of no present-day Mircrosoft OS that will run on that.

It sounds as though you have 2 issues:
I would guess that there is a cheap winmodem in there that wouldn’t even stay connected to your ISP if you JB Welded it to the information highway.

I would also guess that you have bad memory, or insufficient memory. That will cause more blue screens than anything else.

Did you buy this computer used?
If so, you may have the previous owner or the person that sold it to you to blame.
If not, maybe we should send a LARTSquad to the house of the former owners of this company…

As others have indicated, 16 MB is not nearly enough. You didn’t say what OS you were running, but anything over Windows 95 requires at least 64 MB to run effectively. Since it’s a newer machine, it’s probably running at least Win 2000 or XP. If that’s the case, 128 MB is the absolute minimum] I would go with, and I’d prefer to see you with 256 MB or more.

Two thousand bucks? For $700 bucks you can buy a 2 GHz machine with a lot more stuff than that. Even cheapo Emachines stuff is better.

Where the hell did you get this thing, and when? I can’t think of any machine that comes with a DVD drive and only 16 MB of memory.

And I thought my $500 Compaq was bad. But at least it was only $500. And came with 64 MB memory.

Must have meant 16 mb of video memory,

      • Light A Candle: find out what kind of motherboard it has: if it’s generic, replace it with a name-brand mobo. Figure around $100 USD. Try this first: generic mobos often cause mysterious unfixable problems, and if the mobo is crap, nothing else will work right.

$2000 for 16MB RAM & only 32GB hard drive?? Oh, honey! Did they ever see you coming!! That’s just plain sad.

As has been previously noted, too little RAM to run much of anything. Check the system requirements on your games & you’ll most likely see (if they’re newer versions) that they require at least 32MB RAM.

Lord! You could’ve gotten a brand name computer which is twice as good for half the price. I got an HP Pavilion some two years ago which was much better than the one you got, and it was only $1700.

Make sure not to get a non-name computer ever. Please. And return that one or sell it or something. Just stay away.

I think Joey G must be right. 16MB of video RAM makes sense. 16MB of system RAM just can’t be right. Still, that system looks like it has serious problems. Take it back and make them fix it or replace it.

Unfortunately, he can’t take it back or make them fix/replace it:

So, now he’s out the $2K, and has to pay more to upgrade/fix/replace this. That just sucks rocks.

I didn’t see that part. Damn, that does suck. I’d open the thing up, pull all the cards and RAM sticks out, gently clean the edge contacts with a pencil eraser if they don’t look shiny-bright, and reseat them. Also pull out all data and power cables one by one and reseat them. Look for bent or damaged pins while you’re doing this. If that didn’t work, the next step would be to reformat the hard drive, and reinstall the OS and software. Did it come with CDs with the OS and other software on them? If the problems persist after all this, it’s time to start replacing parts, unfortunately. I’d start with the RAM, since it’s relatively cheap and is often the source of problems similar to this.

I’d just format the Hard Drive and start over. Sometimes a clean install fixes everything.

can’t stop laughing I always crack up when I read that! GET A GATEWAY (or something else)!! if you need a reason to get a new computer, smash that one with a sledge hammer. that always removes my stress and anger at machines…uh oh, looks like the tv needs some persuasion, one moment…crashbangcrunch…ah, all better! :slight_smile:

And why?

However: Do not get a Gateway. You’ll regret it if you do.


Apparently, I was looking at the video RAM. We’ve got 32MB.

I had no say in the purchase of this thing. It was all Dad, who seemed to think that, judging from all the other catalogs he found (which were all full of non-name brands) that this was a great deal. Ha!

The only good thing is that we’re getting cable soon, so I won’t have to wait as long for downloads and the like. And, as my brother is going to college soon, he might get stuck with this thing and we could get a better one.

Just say no to Gateway. I own one of those pieces of crap that I decided that dismantling it and storing it in my closet was the best option.

Then again, I was suckered into buying a Gateway with a Celeron processor…

Piece of shit.

Next time, I’m going with Dell.

32 is still insanely little. Buy more ram, replace the modem. Have your local geek do a nice little format and reinstall. Do you know the processor speed of your machine?

With all your prior complaints what makes you think it will work with cable.:eek: