The SDMB already provides one of the better senses of community, and the support tends to intensify for those who ask for it. It’s also one of the richest sources of amusement and fascination available. Finally, it’s one of those places where you can log in and explain exactly how shitty you feel, and for how long, and (as best you can tell) why, and people will listen and commiserate and occasionallly give good advice.
Sometimes they’ll even invite you to visit, or come visit you if you ask for it.
Yes, happyheathen, suicide leaves scars on the living that are excruciatingly hard to heal. I had someone I loved like no other kill herself, and it completely knocked me to the ground. I cry to this day over her when I uncover yet another untapped reservoir of memories associated with her. She was the center of my life for a year, not some name on a death warrant and a toe tag. There isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t wish her back alive.
Unless you’re a the Antichrist or otherwise loved by no one in this world, killing yourself is a Bad Thing.
Speaking as a Board owner and operator, let me assure you that this is a very real worry and concern that I have to deal with sometimes. Almost everyone on my Board is a friend to me, and for that reason alone it would be devastating. It also might associate the Board so much with the event that I would shut it down, rather than continue operating.
And then, of course, there is the whole “People see lawyer’s ad on TV and decide to sue because obviously the Board somehow in some way was ‘negligent’ and connected to the death…”, and you can literally see the dollar signs in the eyes.
I have no doubt that a nasty online suicide would make the SDMB simply cease to exist, without warning.
I’ve tried it - back when I was 17 years old. When I was sure nobody loved me, nobody cared and not a soul on this earth would miss me if I was gone.
I was WRONG. I was saved by a dear friend who drove me to the hospital himself, whereupon I had my stomach pumped and various medicines given to me to counteract the effects of a lot of alcohol and a lot of pills.
I ow my life to a guy named Keith who cared about me, who would definately miss me if I were gone and who loved me very much, it turns out.
During my years in High School, too many classmates decided to off themselves - it seemd to be a ‘fad’ back in the late 70’s.
My best friend tried it (before I knew him) - he was in the hospital longer than I was.
I know from hard experience - suicide is simply NEVER an answer - to ANYTHING.
If you’re even thinking about it, stop right now and call 1-800-SUICIDE. Or go to this link right away.
There’s always someone to help. Trust me on this one.
Usually, perhaps, but not always. It’s certainly logically possible for someone to be loathed by one and all. And if this were true, it could also logically follow that no one would mourn that person’s passing, whether self-inflicted or not.
Not saying it’s at all likely, but it’s possible. Might be best not to paint the issue with a broad, absolute brush.
I am a participant in the psychiatric inmates’ liberation movement, as some of you are probably sick to death of hearing and because suicide threats/attempts/insinuations are one of the things that gets involuntary psychiatric treatment forced upon a person, and we’re opposed to forced psychiatric treatment, we’ve had several discussions about suicide and where one’s rights end.
One activist had just asserted that he has the right to commit suicide and that no one has any ethical business intervening. Judi Chamberlin, author of On Our Own: Patient-Controlled Alternatives to the Mental Health System, replied “You have the right to commit suicide. You do not have the right to commit suicide in my living room. If you try it here I will intervene, even at the expense of your freedom.”
I’ve always thought that was the cleanest clearest ethical position on the subject that I’ve ever heard.
See, about a year, a year and a half ago–July of 2001–one of my best online friends tried to kill herself. She took a shitload of pills, and told one of our mutual online friends and my then-boyfriend, and then me when I signed online.
My ex called the police in her area. The mutual friend mostly talked to her. I called the hotel that she and her family were staying in (the front desk–we couldn’t call the room because she was online). The police and paramedics came, took her to the hospital, and induced her to vomit, then sent her home.
It’s not something the four of us ever really talk about. The friend who tried to kill herself still hates my ex, because he was the one who called the police.
This also happened involving one of my ex’s friends (the girl he cheated on me with, in fact). In that case, I talked to his friend, and one of my friends called the police.
In ANOTHER case involving my friends, I talked down an acquaintance of mine over the phone while she was incredibly drunk.
So, basically, my take on the story was “tell me something I didn’t know about.”
But, yeah, it could happen here. In all odds, it’s statistically likely.
Not that I’ve ever heard. Are you perhaps thinking of Timothy Leary’s death by suicide, which he at one point was going to broadcast on the internet (but then did not)?
It actually has happened here already. A couple of years ago, a regular member with a high post count posted a link to her webcam - with an image to her bloody wrists. The mods were able to track down her husband, he rushed home, and she was okay. It turned out that her medication had recently been changed, and had an (obviously) negative effect.
And I believe that in the past year, a post gave the admins reason to believe that the poster was in danger of harming his/herself. One of them contacted the poster’s ISP in the hopes that they would contact the proper authorities. The poster took issue with those actions and there was a flap about whether the admins were overstepping their bounds.
Juniper, I’m not 100% sure we’re talking about the same person here. I seem to recall a flap about the moderators contacting an ISP, but that was a different poster from the one I was thinking of.
Just to be clear, I am not condemning or insulting the person I mentioned. I like her very much, and I consider her to be a friend. She also happens to have a very serious illness.
as happyheathen points out, there are some cases on which suicide is justified. A friend killed himself after suggering severe, chronic pain for many years. Although he is missed by many friends and family members, I think it would be wrong to expect him to continue to suffer so that we could enjoy his companionship. The difference is that there was no way to alleviate his pain, but depression is treatable.