Not strictly a typo, since my fingers hit exactly the keys that my brain intended for them to hit. I just apparently don’t know how to spell “Dalai”.
What different approach do you think is required, and why do you think so? “a different approach is required” really doesn’t convey much information. I would handle either case the same way, I would be wary of the person and let management/HR know about the weird behavior, and make sure to keep an eye on my stuff afterwards. I’m certainly not going to give them a free pass because ‘it’s their culture’, or try to educate them on really basic social skills instead of doing the work I’m paid for.
When I was a young adult, was joking, and another person didn’t understand that I was, including when this person felt obviously offended, I would double down on the joke, making it even more outrageous (and potentially offending the other person even more), with the expectation that this person would eventually understand that I couldn’t possibly be serious. This was presumably made even worse by the fact that I have a “cold” humor, delivering jokes with an absolutely serious tone. For some reason that I really can’t explain now, I was feeling that it was below me to simply say that I was joking.
So, even though I don’t really get the joke in this case, I can see myself acting pretty much in the way this person did in, say, my early 20s.
In the husband’s place, what part of this exchange w/ a relative stranger would you have found funny enough to laugh out loud? 
Yes. She was one of the most fun patients I had, except when she was trying to steal my clothing/ purses/ headbands/ earrings. I actually got permission to give her a bunch of plastic beads I had and we made some bangles and necklaces with one night when she was a bit more on the same plane as my reality.
Way better than having her covet everything I owned. Plus I could give her the stuff I made too, without it being a “gift” and violating her care plan.
Not the same thing, apparently.
Also, filed under “best of both”, Dalai Llama.
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Same reason us female types bring a purse to work - to lug essential personal items.
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Same reason us IT types bring a backpack to work: to lug our laptops.
I wouldn’t be even remotely surprised to see a male colleague bringing a backpack to the office; in fact in my industry (IT consulting) it’s the norm.
Really not sure why you quoted my post to say that - I didn’t make the claim that only manipulative people act like that. And your younger self is definitely someone I would be wary of if they started doubling down on a ‘joke’ about why I should give them my stuff.
A backpack makes it easy for me to carry things (jacket, mail, bike lock, etc.) when I commute by bicycle; a one-strap laptop/shoulder bag ranks a distant second place by comparison, and an ordinary briefcase would require some kind of bicycle rack or saddlebag.
I work in a call center, and it’s not unusual to see a coworker with a backpack.
Hell, even in a big ad agency I see a lot of backpacks. Maybe not in the 80s, when I started (a lot of three-piece suits and briefcases then), but certainly now.
There’s a major difference between someone who doesn’t know the rules and someone who does but breaks them, or someone incapable of understanding the rules. I’m not here to educate you and your post doesn’t sound like you would want to approach the situation with anything but timidity, defensiveness and fear, so why would I bother?
It would be easier to remember the spelling if you pronounced it to rhyme with “a lie” rather than like “dolly.”
So you claim, but you have actually failed to say how you would respond differently in those situations. I say that while there is a theoretical difference, there is no practical difference - your priority is to make sure that the person who is breaking really basic social rules isn’t going to hurt you or cause you problems later on, and your actions should, like the OP’s husband, focus on making sure that other people are aware of the weird and aggressive actions.
So you can’t actually answer the question of what you’d do differently, you want to just assert that I’m wrong. Criticizing me for being willing to defend myself against against aggressive behavior (like someone demanding my property) and something that’s probably going to turn into a mess at work (like someone acting really weird and unprofessional) is pretty weak. And saying that someone is ‘timid’ for standing up for themselves is just bizarre.
I’d say that depends entirely on whether you as the counterparty have any interest in helping any of the three possible types of misbehaving people, or are simply interested in defending yourself, period. Which goal difference is a pretty fundamental facet of people’s differing personalities.
My personal take, based on my individual personality:[ul][li]Someone who doesn’t know the rules can be educated; I take it upon myself to provide that education gently but firmly. The “one free bite” rule is definitely in effect here.[/li][li]Somebody who can’t understand the rules *may *deserve to be tolerated and pitied, not hated and shunned. Start with the former and let them “earn” the latter over time. Meanwhile your defensive measures, if any, should be as mild and as covert as possible.[/li][li]Somebody who chooses to break the rules is a total loss from the git-go. Hate and shun them from the start. With these folks the best defense is a good offense.[/ul]You (any you) may have a different response repertoire. Including just using Door #3 for everyone you encounter.[/li]
Ideally businesses wouldn’t hire people with these sorts of issues. Or more generally people with any issues at all. But they do. OTOH, ideally they’d hire people who are better workers than 99% of us. Good thing they don’t; most of us would be unemployable.
When he brings his laptop home that goes in the backpack. He also uses it on days like today because our one car a/c doesn’t work and he has that car today. It’s very humid here so he took a pair of shorts and a t-shirt to change into for the ride home. His office is casual, he wears jeans a lot, but not so casual he can wear shorts. When he takes a lunch, which he usually does, he’ll also stick his lunch bag in the backpack with water bottles. It’s been a week since the conversation and there haven’t been anymore incidents. To be honest, I haven’t asked if the two of them have talked at all. I’ll have to ask him over the weekend.