Qu’est-ce l’enfer que c’est? (What is this the hell that this is?)
Mettez-le smaque dabbe sur la table. (Put it smack dab on the table.)
“Vouz Tried Le Rest, Now Try Le Best”
-Things said or seen in a French restaurant according to Dave Barry
Garkon! Tres more drinks avec here, chop chop!
LA puck! Voyons donc, detop! Tout le monde sait ça! 
This said, I wonder where some of the people posting to this thread have learned their French (or Franglais).
:eek:
J’ai des carcajous dans mon pantalon.
Six meses at le Institut de la Service Etranger in WDC. Je parle Francais real bon, non? Mes professeurs fueron de quelques partes de Africa. J’ai habite in Africa de la ouest pendant deux ans, plus o moins.
Oh merde, j’oblie’, maintenant j’etudie espanol et me francais est mauvais parceque that.
Silenus: Le Carcajou! C’est plus mauvais que les chats dans my prior post. Que pena!
Chefguy: Aucun badiner ! Je pense qu’ils rient de moi, aussi.
Can anyone else still recite the memorized conversations from French class? This is from junior high (about 1962). J’entre dans la salle de classe. Je regards au tour de moi. Paul et Louise, comment va t’ils? Paul va vorte bien, mais Louise est malade. J’en suis desolee. Est-ce c’est grave? Non, ce n’est pas grave…
That has been rattling around in my brain over 40 years. Shudder.
I suppose that’s comment vont not va, right?
Mais je sais comment dire <<merde!>> 
<- rire
Weirdo.
Je parle une petit peu, tres mal desole. Je attende Ecole en Francais IN ALBERTA so my French isn’t so much French as some mess of Albertan patois, which includes Cree and White Russian as much as French.
Sorry to correct your MP French but it’s (from memory):
“I don’t wanna talk to you no more you empty-headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father (smelled/smelt) of elderberry.”
i can still remember my entire gcse french oral exam. not that any french person would be able to understand a word of it, most french people seem to think i am talking italian when i try to speak french. stupid accent.
My god, y’zon yin qu’à parler comme du monde…
Avoir des chats en tes pantalons se semble pas une chose rationale… as-toi une bonne armure pour ta saucisse?
Un peu d’école d’immersion quand j’erait une petite fille, une année d’ecole de langues et une année de WoW en francaise ne sont pas suffisant pour parler bien le français, mais je le comprend decentment.
And I can mix it with Spanish too! And with Catalan: my biggest problem at the Official School of Languages was that often I was writing the answers to an exercise, and then I’d re-read them and think “no, that can’t be right - that’s Catalan! How is it in French?”
:smack:
It was the same way, in French. But because we got points taken off for writing the wrong answer, I’d left it blank.
Lesson 1 in my first English book:
Johnny is under the table.
Mary is on the table.
William is in the kitchen.
We got about 1/3 through the book in 4th grade. For 5th grade we got the same book and, because half the students were new (they came from another school that only reached 4th grade), we took it again from the start. The other two schools in town that had English that early used the same book.
“Johnny is under the table” is guaranteed to cause groans in about half the Spaniards my age.
I can read French filtered through my HS Latin (which is to say, not at all), but did you just say you had potatoes in your pants?
I’m so confused now.
Cheers,
G
Je suis acadien. ( 
à quebecois) Il est parfois difficile de se faire comprendre.
My spelling and verb conjugations are désastreux. I can translate the written stuff easily, understand it being spoken with very little trouble, and speak it well - but only well. I sometimes stammer or switch proper word position. My French spelling is atrocious, and, quite frankly, embarrassing. Which sucks, since my English spelling is quite good.
:eek: French *spelling * is my English math! Eureka! runs off into the sunset
des chats = cats in any French book I’ve ever seen.
Potatoes are pommes de terre (earth apples, literally). Like Cunctator said, Chefguy’s hot dog appears to be in the company of cats.