Kythereia is the Tooth Fairy.
Regallag_The_Axe is Santa Claus.
Swampbear is the Easter Bunny.
rayh once tried to market coffee grounds and peanut butter mixed together as a cure for acne.
When bored, **swampbear ** entertains himself by stuffing petrified wood into his nostrils.
CairoCarol uses Chick Tracts for toilet paper
Annie-Xmas uses sedated puppies as throw pillows.
NinjaChick thinks that cartoons are actually real live people that “just happen to live somewhere everything is really colorful, and animals can talk”, and keeps peering underneath her couch because she’s going to find the gateway one day and then won’t we all feel silly for making fun of her.
Mr Bus Guy has a bizarre and rare speech impediment that forces him to say any word with a double letter twice. If you ask him to “bookkeeper” he’ll just punch you in the face.
Aioua spent the first eleven years of his/her life looking for the missing “e” in his/her first name. Fortunately, the family name is " Elberfelder " and so there are plenty of “e”'s to go around.
Cartooniverse tried to convince rms to go murder puppies with James Gosling at Symbolics. rms successfully inserted a space cadet keyboard into Cartooniverse’s ass and used the subsequent key chords coming off the thing to program GNU Emacs.
Derleth as a child, used to scrape paper wads and spitballs off the blackboard and re-use them. This involved sticking them back in his mouth, a fact which meant he was 34 before anyone would kiss him.
(or her, I didn’t check first)
Mr Bus Guy was in fact the first person to kiss Derleth.
Him, in fact.
rayh has perfect pitch and can whistle anything he likes down a phone line by imitating a modem. He once reprogrammed a PDP-8 to make its disk drive walk across the room and crush his romantic rival with all its washing machine-sized bulk. Since he was in San Bernadino and the computer was in New Jersey, his alibi was perfect.
Derleth is the one and only member of the OFFICIAL LITTLE BIG HORN REENACTMENT SOCIETY. To date he has burned down three RVs and four teepees while dressed as Custer and scalped at least 5 tourists while dressed as Sitting Bull. Lucky for him he’s protected by an ordinance that protects scalping and wanton destruction as part of his religion (Southern Baptist-Reformed).
Sampiro is the only other person to have kissed Derleth.
Rayh has two penises, one on either side like a snake. Both are held on with Velcro.
Sampiro helps Rayh with the Velcro every morning, and takes his own sweet time in doing so.
When Elendi’s Heir learned the above song, he/she wrote the song “Detachable Penis.” And Elendi was the best friend of John Wayne Bobbitt.
Most men cross their legs when they see Elendi coming.
Annie wears a “very special necklace” with a bead for every ear and nose she has bitten off of a man who has done her wrong, and she has a dozen giant sons who carry her on their shoulders smiling through her moustache. She also is the only known wearer of Lee Press On Nostrils.
I get that damned song stuck in my head whenever I see your name and am glad I finally got to quote from it. 
Sampiro really DID walk barefoot three miles to school, and three miles back every day, uphill both ways, on broken glass and it usually always snowed.
Mr Bus Guy has a mint condition first edition of Tiger Beat which he counts as his most cherished possession.