A couple inches longer than shoulder length - but it looks damn good.
I haven’t seen anyone post about cosmetic surgery. I would love to do that but I feel if I got started I might not stop, like Michael Jackson (that is, assuming I could scape together millions of dollars!)
Well, I’m glad to see there are at least a few other females out there who don’t use makeup or do much for vanity’s sake. When I was a teenager, I did the makeup (and I was one of those girls who dress all in tattered black lace, so when I say makeup, I mean MAKEUP), I did the hair, I did the waxing-various-body-parts, I did it all. And then I grew up.
Okay, actually, I went to college, got mono, and learned the True Value of Sleep as compared to all other activities. During most of my freshman year, if given a choice between doing Nobel Prize-winning research and a nap, I’d’ve taken the nap. Clearly, beauty routines weren’t going to get much of a look in. Also, I realized - and accepted - that I will never be pretty, no matter how much makeup and junk I use. So I just do enough stuff to keep from being hideously unsightly and call it good.
Makeup? Hah. I had an interview last week and didn’t put on any makeup; if they want someone who can write and edit, I’m their woman, but if they want someone who knows how to use makeup (beyond thick black eyeliner, dead pale skin, and blood red lips, all of which I assume I could still do if I wanted), best to hire someone else and spare us all a lot of unhappiness. (They hired me, though, so I guess they wanted a writer.)
My major concessions to vanity: [ol][li]Getting my hair cut every two years. And don’t laugh. It is traumatic, and once every two years is all I can stand. Why? I have curly hair. Naturally curly hair. Professional scissor-people take one look at my hair and think “Layer - must layer.” No matter how often I repeat that I do NOT want a layer cut because they ALWAYS turn my head into Frizz Central, the same thing happens. They say, “Okay, then, I’ll just shape it a little,” and an hour later I have another violent layer cut that’ll take the better part of a year to grow out and will have me looking like a burned-out '80s heavy metal chick in the meantime. This has happened when I’ve paid $200 for haircuts and when I’ve paid $10 for haircuts and everywhere in between. It’s gotten to where crying “no layers!” is my kneejerk reaction to the sight of scissors or the smell of perm solution.[/li]
[li]Tweezing unwanted hairs. I did so much of this as a teenager that it doesn’t hurt anymore. I actually - yes, it’s true - enjoy it. There’s something so satisfying about ripping the little buggers out by the roots. When I’m bored and I don’t have any misplaced hairs to tweeze, I’ll tweeze my legs.[/li]
[li]Shaving my legs. I like wearing skirts and dresses, and I don’t like scaring small children, and in any case hairy legs make me itch.[/li]
Shaving my armpits. I just do. I mean, it takes four seconds - why not?[/ol]There ya go. Deepbluesea’s beautification routine. Reading what most of the rest of y’all do makes me feel like a total Scunge Monster, I tell you. (And, actually, that might be true.)
I’ve been waxed, had electrolysis, been tattooed, and have had my breasts augmented.
For vanity? Nothing… about the only thing I do regularily is shave my armpits after that it’s my legs… I get my eyebrows waxed every so often when I think of it and it has never hurt me (so far)… as to make-up the only time I wear it is when I have to dress up for something… like holiday parties or clubbing and then it’s only a little powder and eyeshadow with bronzer for blush. I have naturally thick black eyelashes though I am still jealous of my brother for his are even better than mine. Mine are clear at the tips so when I add mascara they look like his but I’m generally too lazy.
I plan on getting a tattoo…
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by deepbluesea *
[list=1][li]Getting my hair cut every two years. And don’t laugh. It is traumatic, and once every two years is all I can stand. Why? I have curly hair. Naturally curly hair. Professional scissor-people take one look at my hair and think “Layer - must layer.” No matter how often I repeat that I do NOT want a layer cut because they ALWAYS turn my head into Frizz Central, the same thing happens. They say, “Okay, then, I’ll just shape it a little,” and an hour later I have another violent layer cut that’ll take the better part of a year to grow out and will have me looking like a burned-out '80s heavy metal chick in the meantime. This has happened when I’ve paid $200 for haircuts and when I’ve paid $10 for haircuts and everywhere in between. It’s gotten to where crying “no layers!” is my kneejerk reaction to the sight of scissors or the smell of perm solution. [/li][/QUOTE]
Yes! YES YES YES!!! [gets down on her knees and grovels at deepbluesea’s feet] Oh woman, I know exacty where you are coming from!
*
Every single hairdresser I have ever been to* has always wanted to layer my hair, saying “It will make the curls easier to take care of” except all of them have naturally straight hair, they don’t know what it’s like! “NO layers, I repeat, NO LAYERS!” “Okay, just let me snip off the ends a bit here, and, oh! I know what I can do! I’ll use a little gel, and spritz this up a bit, oh this is so much fun!”. Nobody has curly hair like in the movies, curly hair=frizzy hair, frizzy hair=pain in the ass. I feel your pain, we are sisters. Nobody understands like we do…
Two hints for next time:
There is an over-the-counter product that blocks needle pain, EMLA, that you apply to the appropriate area (used commonly for children - or adults - before injections) and by people undergoing electrolysis. EMLA is effective for one to two hours. With it you could probably tweeze your own brows and not have to pay to have it done.
The other - sorry I don’t have a brand name for you - is temporary eyebrow dye that is not harmful. If you have to repeat the application more often, so what? I used it some years ago on both brows and lashes and had no problems whatsoever. It was as gentle as applying mascara. Do a google.com search on ‘eyebrow dye’ and see what you come up with. The temporary dye lasted about ten days.
Good luck!
Dear God.
I’m going to do it all over again, tomorrow.
Someone, please help me! Help me! I don’t want to dye!
[sub][sup]ok, that was just bad[/sup][/sub]
Lessee:
Shave every day: face, head, parts of shoulders/chest if I want to feel really fresh-groomed.
Occasionally iron and wear a fancy camp shirt instead of my usual black t-shirt.
Tatoos: 4 of 'em. I’m due to get the worst 3 covered with better art.
Pierced ear: two holes in left ear.
Make sure those heavy hairs growing around my ears (guys, you know what I’m talking about) are kept in check with tweezers.
And you know, the funny thing is that this isn’t so much to make me look good as it is to avoid looking bad. Does that make sense?
Laser Hair Removal.
Two weeks ago, I had my eyebrows permanently “done.” It cost a bit, ($125) and may require another trip to complete the process. However, it’s almost painless, left no noticeable marks afterward, and is permanent. I was so sick of tweezing my mono-brow that it was worth every penny to me.
Of course, some people may have worse reactions to it than I did and have some red skin from the procedure. But apparently even in the worst cases it doesn’t last long and can be instantly covered up with make up if you choose.
I was actually so excited about finally being rid of this daily torture process that I had a little party.
I may have my armpits lasered next.
Gee, all I do to be beautiful is breathe. 
Not for beauty’s sake alone, Zebra. Although I know plenty of people that would stop breathing if it would make them more beautiful - and I also know plenty that it would make more interesting to talk to.
I can’t believe this. I was reading this thread as I was tugging at a stray hair on my right earlobe. I thought I was the only one nutty enough to do that. And for exactly the same reason. I know that it’s nonsense, but I doubt I could stop now if I wanted to.
Speaking of anecdotal evidence:
http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a4_124.html
Heh… I had the pretty pink parts waxed once last April before my senior prom. I figured it’d be an easy way to get it done and not deal with shaving down there for a little while. I got the whole damned thing waxed by a really nice Brazillian woman with a small English vocabulary. For some odd reason, the further away from the center you get, the more it hurts. I’ve now learned that I’m going to stick to shaving from now on 'cause it feels better and I don’t have to deal with looking like a freshly plucked chicken for 2 days after I shave.
How on earth do you ladies convince your stylists to give you layers? I have medium to thick hair that tapers off right below my breasts, and I’ve been coveting a slightly longer than shoulder-length, layered cut similar to Britney Spears’s. And no matter which stylist I go to, even when I beg for layers, the most I get is a slightly jagged cut. One stylist explained to me, “the best I can do is verrrry long layers. Sorry.” Well, gee, that helps. :rolleyes: I’ve always been baffled as to why my hair seems to emit “DO NOT LAYER” waves. My friend, who’s studying to be a hair stylist, says my hair is in excellent condition and that layers would not only be possible, but look wonderful. deepbluesea, ladyfoxfyre - I may have to try what seems to work for you (albeit not in your favor) and beg for a layerless cut next time I want the job done. 
As for my beauty routine, I pluck and lighten my eyebrows, as well as lighten my hair from dark brown up to tawny golden blond/brown. I diet, whiten my teeth, visit the tanning salon, and dance/jog/work out up to a total of about 2 hours a day. But quite possibly the most painful thing I have ever had to do for the sake of vanity is limit my chocolate intake. 
Waitaminute.
Senior Prom.
High School girls get this done?
Maybe I should quit the technical sector entirely and become a stylist…
When I’m not deeply, horribly stressed, I have my eyebrows waxed regularly. Every now and then, I pluck a little to keep them from looking too rangy.
This is because my eyebrows look like twin woolybears in their natural state. My face informs the world that it’s going to be a cold winter all year long. One day, my eyebrows will spin cocoons, hang off of my face as white cottony things for a little while, and then burst forth as lovely arctiid moths. Then they’ll fly away, and I’ll have to shave the remainders of the cocoons and paint on new, hyper-thin brows with eyeliner pencil.
Oddly enough, my most recent ex-boyfriend loved my thick eyebrows, even though I think they make me look like Karl Marx with a sex change. Go figure.
It’s actually quite a bit of work to slim down my woolybears. I have a very strong glasses prescription, and I don’t have contacts. This means I have to stand very, very, VERY close to the mirror to see what I’m doing at all, and then the tweezer hits the mirror surface almost every time I pluck. Ouch. Having the job done by a beautician is so much nicer.