I went through a really bad time right after my second child. It all came from the realization that I lost everything about me that I used to define myself with.
My job. I worked in theatre, I loved my job, but because I was on mat leave I was denied the chance to even apply for the only opportunity of advancement within the company. They hired someone with zero experience and basically the whole department quit because of it. Everybody who quit assumed that I would have been promoted and left when they learned who was hired.
My husband works lots of evening and weekends, so my job would need to be 9 to 5. Those jobs don’t exist in theatre. I am not trained in anything else, so I feel pretty lost right now.
My side job. I did a few set designs a year. Not enough to make a living, but enough to fulfil my creative side. I was pretty good, and was even nominated for an award for a design. I tried to do two designs this past year and they were complete disasters. This was because I couldn’t dedicate the time I needed to, and we had major childcare issues.
Hobbies. I love photography, but I haven’t had a chance to take pictures of anything but children for about 3 years.
Crafting. I have a lovely craft area set up downstairs, but I never get to use it. I am one of those people that loves to create, but kids changed all that.
Movies, I don’t know the last time I saw one in the theatre. Maybe Christmas?
So now I am trying to figure out new ways to define myself. I don’t want my whole life to revolve around kids. I love them, but I need more than one thing going on in my life.
Wow, that sounds really depressing. My kids are fantastic, I love them to bits, but I am just at a crossroads in my life right now, and having kids was the catalyst.