Wipe Warmer at the changing station. I thought it was “over the top” for baby coddling and after not having one and then having one I realized that the warm wipe doesn’t wake the baby up the way a cold wipe wakes 'em up. So at that midnight diaper change, the warm wipe will keep them in the near-sleep mode verse the wide-awake-what-is-that-cold-thing-on-my-butt mode.
Also, baby’s and toddler’s don’t have access to their privates when they’re wearing a diaper, so the bath is really the only time they can check out that part of their body. So don’t be surprised by that.
Also some of the kids I dealt with would pee in the bath soon after being put in the bath, I use that to help potty train them. Dip their foot in the bath, wait for the pee, put 'em on the toilet. Then every bath after that I’d put them on the toilet and say “pee now.” If they pee’d fine, and if not then dip in the bath, wait for the pee, then back on the toilet. Eventually every kid got it and would pee prior to the bath. I wouldn’t try to do this until 18 months though.
Wipes are totally awesome. I always have wipes in the car and around the house, even after my kids mastered the toilet. They’re great for sticky hands, faces, any kind of mess.
They grow up really fast…which means that although you can’t spoil a baby, you can sure set up bad habits for yourself and baby you don’t want to continue.
If you don’t want them to discover McDonald’s Happy Meals, don’t introduce them. If you only want them to drink water down apple juice, never - out of laziness or availability, give them the full leaded version. If you want them to play by themselves, let them play by themselves as babies, don’t let them become dependent on you for entertainment.
Its easy to turn around and realize that the little baby that wasn’t paying any attention at all to Jersey Shore now is a toddler who sees WAY too much, the baby who you didn’t mind at all cuddling to sleep is now a toddler who can’t self sooth and you have a second on the way to worry about.
There is nothing wrong with Happy Meals or endless TV (or rather, that is a different debate) - and certainly nothing wrong with cuddling a baby to sleep, but don’t give yourself or baby a pass because its easy right now. It isn’t going to get easier.
I keep a plastic grocery bag in each car, containing one diaper and a ziploc bag with half a dozen wet wipes in it. This makes it possible to spontaneously decide to go somewhere without going home to pick up the diaper bag first.
And, a pat on the back and “Well done, sir!”, to you and you’re wife for (a) adopting a child(ren), and (b) doing, what looks to be, an exemplary job of raising him/them! IMHO
I actually have a video of my baby doing that. I also have this video of him falling over the edge of his playpen. In both cases, my husband decided to let the baby experience for his own, and he was right there to grab the baby immediately before he got hurt. Now we have an cautious but adventurous toddler.
Here is our own: the books told us to bathe our baby “regurlarly” (as a parent, you start to hate such vague instructions) but our son hated baths, so we just wiped. But I had no idea how deep some of those skin folds are. One day our baby had a bad smell about him, and we were worried. What was going on? Did a bad body-odor indicate some digestion problem? It turned out some milk had leaked to the deepest crevices under his chin, congealed and started to mould there. :o We sure pestered our son about cleaning those folds afterwards. When my husband told his sister, she laughed and fessed up that her daughter had had her moulding milk in the crevice behind her ear.
Dangling earrings and hoops are bad. Flailing baby hands and targets of opportunity are often a not fun combination.
My grandmother had one of her grandchildren stick a finger in a tiny hoop earring she was wearing and before they could free her she had a slit in her ear instead of a hole.
Long hair is also subject to this risk but the downside is less permanent.
You already know this - I already knew this, but it took going through it with my first for me to really <i>get</I> this: You only have a baby for a matter of weeks. Look at a one year old child - they aren’t a baby anymore, they’re past that baby stage. This means actual babyhood lasts something less than 52 weeks. Try to suck all the good moments you can out of those brief weeks because they’ll be over for good so, so quickly.
Breastfeeding hurts a lot for at least a month. If you can grit your teeth and wait it out, it gets a lot easier after that and (imo) is worth the effort. Of course, if you don’t the world will end, the sky will fall, etc etc., but I’m sure you’ll encounter at least one breast nazi who can fill you in on the exact details. My only point is that, for one month, breastfeeding hurts a lot but then it gets better. Maybe knowing that will help when you’re making the best choice for you and your baby.
Newborns need about 12 nappy changes a day. No hyperbole. 12. This number will taper off.
Something to brace yourself for when you’re having the baby: needles. I know you’re phobic, so this bit is going to suck for you. I had to have a lot this time because things didn’t go so well and I ended up having a c-section, so I’m probably nearly a worst case scenario, but I remember at least 7 needles during the four days I was at the hospital. Sorry. Forewarned is forearmed, right?
Be forewarned… Along with learning to crawl/walk, comes learning to climb! And some (read, a lot of) babies have absolutely **no fear **of heights! :eek: (Yours truly, included.)
There is a picture somewhere (I’ll try and find it, later.) of me in early toddler phase, hanging upside down, having gotten hung by my diaper on the ornamental top of a 4’ chain link fence gate.
According to the oft repeated story, I had only been “out of sight” for less than a minute. In that time, I had managed to climb to the top of the gate in an attempt to get into the backyard in what could only be surmised as an attempt to “play with the doggie”. (Mom’s trying to get me unhung… Dad said, “NO, wait! Make sure he doesn’t fall, while I get the camera!”
OMG…she’s finally asleep. Now I get to go to sleep. Sweet, sweet, WONDERFUL sleep. I’ve never wanted to sleep so much in my entire…WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Floods of breastmilk. I liked breastfeeding, did it for years, but god this part is gross. For the first month or two while your body is still figuring out supply and demand it is possible to find yourself awash in sticky milk. When nursing on one side the other would gush. Breast pads, pfft. I had to stuff a whole wadded up cloth diaper in the other side of my bra while I was nursing to even hope to soak up all the milk the “waiting” breast would let down.
Pretty much the whole time I was nursing I had to sleep with my chest swathed in an absorbent towel with another by the bed to swap out in the night. Blech. Get a waterproof mattress pad. I was much more likely to soak the bed than any of the babies.
2. Extremely exploratory babies. I have read some parents say “don’t child proof, teach your child what not to touch.” FUCK THAT. My oldest started crawling off on his belly at five months old. He was full on crawling and climbing stairs by seven months. All three of mine were like that and we were constantly pulling our hair out trying to keep them out of and off of things while madly trying to figure out how to child-proof them (the things.)
3. Post-partum euphoria. I guess I’m lucky this way, but having a baby makes me higher than a kite. There’s really no feeling for me that can compare to the first few hours after having a baby (before the exhaustion sets in). It’s so good it’s almost worth summoning a whole other human being into existence to get it again. Almost.
Feeling murderous rage toward the baby. My lizard brain didn’t care that I loved my baby. Aaaah, something just poked me in the eye and I’m in pain, kill it! Something is making the most insanely irritating noise ever, kill it! It’s fine to put a squalling baby down in a safe place and leave it there while your cortex puts a lock down on more primitive emotions.
Actually, you are right. Babies have an impressive skill set. I remember being so impressed at how my baby coped with being put alone on an alien planet, with different physics, where he was helpless and didn’t speak the language.
Here’s one that seems to slip through the cracks: Toddler tummy.
It’s a mark of how rarely this condition is discussed that I couldn’t even find a nice clear link for it. The link above is pretty good, but it (a) disambiguates to “toddler diarrhea” and (b) implies that a reduction in juice drinking is likely to help (perhaps it does in some cases, but not in my son’s).
Anyway, don’t listen to the medical experts, listen to me - a mom whose kid had toddler tummy until … ??? (Who knows, he’s 13 and he may still have it, but thankfully once the kid is toilet trained - and knows to wipe himself fastidiously - it is no longer a problem for parents.) “Toddler tummy” is basically “loose bowels all the time, seen in an otherwise healthy kid.” Our son had exactly one beautiful, well-formed solid stool as a baby, and then had loose stools about 1-2 times/day in his diaper forever. If he EVER had another solid poop, I was not witness to it.
It’s wearisome for sure, as nearly every diaper change is filled with loose, messy poop. Another boy in my son’s playgroup had it too, and his mom found absolutely no information or help from doctors at all. It was like a light went on in her head when I told her I had learned there was a condition called “todder tummy.”
I have no idea how common it is, but it can’t be that rare if it showed up twice in one playgroup.
Our son went to one of the top pediatricians in the Boston area, and he was completely unconcerned by it. (He agreed with me that the advice on the internet to “limit liquids” is appalling.) So it’s gross, but harmless.
While waiting for the stork to drop off our first blessing, a friend informed me that you aren’t really a parent until you want to pick your kid up and toss him out the window.
If your child is in day care, he or she will get something like 10 colds a year for the first two years, plus at least a couple of the more serious childhood illnesses (mine got croup and Hand, Foot and Mouth disease before she was 18 months old). Not to mention ear infections and random bouts of vomiting. You’ll get most of those.
Swim diapers don’t work like regular diapers. I mean, I guess this is obvious, but they’re only intended to hold in solids, not liquids. So if your husband can’t find the baby’s summer clothes on the first hot day and has the kid out in the yard in nothing but a swim diaper, and you pick up the kid and carry him on your hip over to visit with the next-door neighbor and chat for a while, don’t be surprised when you’re suddenly soaking wet.
I like the logic, but this may not work on all babies. My parents being sensible, cautious types, we had a stairgate at the top of our stairs. My brother aged ~18 months, out of sight for a minute or two, climbed up the bannisters beside it and threw himself all the way down the stairs. Apparently he sat up and laughed at the bottom. He was none the worse for that episode, but concussed himself 5 times before the age of 18 through activities ranging from standing on things he shouldn’t have as a todler to downhill mountain-biking as a teenager. He now works as a tree surgeon, and wakeboards, surfs, mountain bikes, snowboards and does mixed martial art fighting as hobbies. If there’s a physical thing he’s afraid of, we haven’t found it yet. Some kids just don’t really learn!
And if your child isn’t in day care, you will go through this entire process when they start preschool, or kindergarten. Just prepare for it.
Which reminds me, here’s something I wish someone had told me: If you’re in doubt about whether or not to call the doctor, call. That’s what they’re there for. They’re not going to laugh at you or bitch because you disturbed them, and if they do, find a new doctor. You’re a new parent. You’re not going to know the difference between “minor cough, no big deal” and “holy shit, go to the ER”. It’s sort of a fine line between those two, to be honest. So if you have doubts, call it in.
A friend advised me that my baby would roll off the bed. That it was ok. And she did. And it was (although there was a call to the pediatrician to be absolutely sure). I was glad she warned me.
