Parks and Rec: Ron Johnson speech?

Cafe Society
1

I believe there’s an episode of Parks and Recreation where Ron Johnson gives an absolutely horrible speech, and he explains later that speeches should only relate facts and not emotion – or something to that effect – much to Leslie Knope’s disappointment.

Does anyone remember what I’m talking about, and can point me to an episode?

2

Ron Swanson, although there are about 18,000 episodes so there could well be a Ron Johnson lurking in there.

I’m pretty sure I remember the speech, and a it was a master-class in brevity.

3

His woodworking chair award acceptance maybe?

4

Yeah, he does it a few times. Makes me think of his art speech, but I don’t remember if Leslie commented on it:

5

Ah yes. Swanson.

I now recall the art one, which may suit my needs… but if anyone recalls a Ron talking about how speeches should only be facts, that would be very much appreciated.

And rewarded!

(This is not a promise of a reward.)

6

If you want a hilarious just-the-facts-Ma’am speech, take a look at the fourth episode of the second season of the HBO series Succession. Here is a link to the scene on YouTube. (The reason for the ridiculous speech was to make things difficult for a writer researching a book on the family of the guy delivering the eulogy.)

7

This one

8

I’m still embarrassed by the Johnson/Swanson thing, but I think the art gallery speech is what I vaguely remembered.

Thanks folks!

9

"I refuse to lather Marlene up, kiss her ring like everybody else. Instead, I’ll be delivering a speech of facts.

“Marlene is a woman. She has worked in the government for three decades. Thirty years. Properly applied, that’s how long a good varnish should last. So, Marlene, it is true that you have won this award.”
It’s the one where Marlene gets the Tellenson Award, Leslie’s sassy, powerful and dynastic haircut makes her stand out for the wrong reasons, and Ron gets his fill of bacon-wrapped shrimp, his number one favorite food wrapped around his number 3 favorite food.

I don’t think Leslie even notices Ron’s speech, she’s too busy being trying to cement the Knope family political dynasty by convincing Zoning Board member Jeanine Restrepo to rezone the pit into a park.

10

God, I miss that show.

FWIW Nick Offerman has a woodworking studio. My daughter bought us a set of monogrammed coasters. It’s pretty cool. https://offermanwoodshop.com/