I was standing outside our offices in the UK, when the unmistakable sound of a person hawking and clearing their throat came from round the corner. This continued over the space of about 15 seconds before a man steps round the corner and proceeds to spit out large globs of phlegm. Three times as he strolled by our building.
I openly watched him as he walked away. He must have noticed because he started thumping his chest and clearing his throat again as if to say, “ah terrible chest” blah.
Nevertheless I don’t go around peppering the pavement with my spit and worse, even when I’m congested.
Am I the only one this pisses off? And does it happen round your neighbourhood?
No you’re not the only one. It’s disgusting and uneccessary. People who spit think its more sanitary then to swallow the phlegm. You know, the phlegm that forms right there in their own throats. Somehow its better to expose globs of bodily fluid to the general populace. They’re idiots and boors, and it’s our duty to punish them socially with scorn and ostricization.
I spit on the road. I don’t want to swallow it if I just went to all that work getting it out of my throat. I don’t spit on sidewalks, gardens, or most politicians. If you are going to be licking the middle of any roads any time soon, let me know and I won’t spit there.
Oh man. This pisses me off to no end. Picture if you will, a smoking area frequented by dozens of people at a time. They have benches for the folks to sit on.
One guys sits there for a half hour, spitting loogies about every two minutes. Right on the pavement between his feet. I go to sit down and there’s like a spitoon’s worth of loogiage. I turned him in to the security guard.
I mean, this guy could have hocked his loogiage into the grass or somewhere where people weren’t supposed to be sitting. The bench was rendered useless because there were so many loogies that you couldn’t sit down without stepping in them.
IT’S OK TO SWALLOW PHLEGM.
Hmmm. Sounds like an OP written by someone who’s never had a real bad chest cold. Once or twice a year I become a untapped national repository of mucus. It has to go somewhere and swallowing it is not an option. So it’s either spit or gag. I try to be inconspicous about it – I have no illusions that it’s pleasant for passersby to see or hear. But it’s that or gag.
(yeah, I try to use tissues, but we’re talking truly massive amounts of phlegm. Even after loading up on tissues, I usually exhaust my supply.)
I think you just have to get used to the idea that humans are just vile bags of nasty fluids.
I wonder if there’s one of those “fun facts” for loogies like they have for the numbers of spiders you’ll eat while sleeping over the course of your life, something along the lines of In any given instance, somewhere around the world there are 7 loogies flying through the air.
…because?
Screw it, that’s worth making up…
*Out of every 237 spat loogies, at least one will hit a pair of mating cats.
In 1974 on a cold day in Detroit, an exceptionally large loogie put a dent in an Opal GT.
The Incas were the first to use loogies to mark ownership of herd animals.
A loogie was found still attached to a jawbone in Olduvai Gorge, making it the oldest snossil on record.*
(snort!) You said “snossil”!
Let us not forget the Great Loogie Pyramid in Egypt. Smaller than the more famous pyramids, this one was created by slave labor while they were on break.
Maybe the guy was Phlegmish-American. You never know.
Never, ever, go to China.
It makes him gag?
Just my own, or anybodys?
**Pavements of Phlegm ** - Band name!
I was going to offer a similar sbit of unsolicited advice: If you’re ever in NYC, Philly Boston or DC, avoid the discount bus lines at all costs…or wear waders.
Pretty much. Not to mention the heartburn and nausea – I’m feeling sick enough, I don’t need to contribute to it. Really – your body is doing its best to get rid of the stuff. I don’t see how consuming it could be a good thing.
I was in the Army and I have to say that my favorite times were the cooling off stretching sessions after we did some particularly strenuous PT. All the smokers would be hacking up their respective lungs right on the ground where we would be sitting and putting our hands. Not like we could move because of the whole military formation thing. Tasty!!
I work in a factory, and am one of two females in a department of some forty-odd men. Not only is it considered acceptable to spit anyoldplace, there are some that do it constantly. You’re just having a conversation and they cough and hack and strangle and turn slightly and spit, picking the dialogue right back up.
I feel your pain.
Yes I’ve had a chest cold. I just don’t go round hacking up a greenie and letting rip in front of the general populace. And this fella isn’t the only example I have seen recently, so don’t dwell on the king kong impression he did as he walked away. That was a direct result of my glare. Others seem immune.
I agree pavements of phlegm is a potential band name. Perhaps with something a little more. We got glare. Waders… what else we got in here?..
Aside from the fact that women get chest colds and you rarely see them hockin’ up loogies and spitting them in public places. It’s a rude macho guy thing. Disgusting.