That whole rant was funny as hell. Kensington Krafts…HAAAA!
neutron star, you are an annoying little shit aren’t you?
fatgail, I still 
you.
Agreed. Yes, they are mini ones; yes, they are expensive ($3.99 a box), but they’re delicious. More important, they satisfy my sweet tooth.
Unfortunately, Kroger doesn’t carry them all the time so I have to snatch up several boxes at a time when I see them, which I’m sure makes me the laughing stock of the cashier.
Man, this is what kills me about the 100 calorie sensation that’s sweeping the nation. Everything’s got a 100 calorie version. And sometimes that ain’t so smart, because you get jack shit for 100 calories.
Rant on, fatgail, we volume eaters feel your pain! 
Coming up next: 100 calorie packs of butter! Oh wait, I think that product already exists. It’s called a “pat”.
I’m glad that a few of you understand the true pain of a dissatisfying snack. It’s really unlike most of our nation’s terrors.
100 calorie packs are nice for people who have no self control. That’s me. Put a pack of Oreos in front of me and I’ll eat them until they’re gone. Once I open up a sleeve of Thin Mints, that sleeve becomes a portion. I’m like a crack addict with sugar.
100 calorie packs are great. I know I’m being ridiculous but there it is.
That’s not a lack of self control…that’s a desire to be neat! Who needs crumpled up bags of cookies laying around
I think the inclusion of these lines puts it well into rant territory - fatgail works in accounting, for god’s sake, people. She must use humour as a defense mechanism to not be driven insane.
I don’t get what the bitching about your OP is all about, either. If it had been posted by one of the Golden Boys of the SDMB, people would have been tying themselves in knots trying to fawn over it the loudest.
On a somewhat-related note, have you checked out the tiny little chocolate bars? Being in accounting myself, I did the math on them - I can get a tiny little chocolate bar that is (if I recall correctly) half the size of a full-sized one for 3/4 of the price. I’m not a Chartered Accountant or anything, but that doesn’t sound like a good deal to me.
ETA: I mean that the price of a regular chocolate bar is $1.00 and the half-sized one is $0.75 (for example).
Lotta cunts in the Pit today…
Wow, some of you are some self-righteous, arrogant, humor-impaired assholes. Fuck you.
Great rant, fatgail. I laughed out loud. Don’t let the jerks upthread get you down.
Not only do I work in accounting, but I work in accounting with a man who likes to whistle little tunes all day.
I find myself saying this everytime I try and get through the lines at Ikea.
My husband, who absolutely lacks any self control in the sweets area, buys the 100 packs of Chessmen.
The others don’t affect me. But the Chessmen? My god. The little packet is just like a warm up. It makes me want more Chessmen, not fewer.
Then a few months ago I was really sick and decided the only thing that would help was Chessmen. The store was out. It became a mission, but all stores were out.
It was a goddamned conspiracy against me.
Never did find any. The urge finally went away and now I just avoid the little packets.
OMG! I’m still laughing!
Blasphemy!!!
Most excellent and humorous post. Accurately describes the worst unthinkable horrors faced by today’s cookie fiend. Warm and inviting at the start, and genuinely human and snarky throughout. Would read again. A+++++++++++
I say this, as I work my way through a fresh bag of Albertson’s chewy and decadant chocolate chip cookies. There must be something like 3000 calories in there.
i aggree! that shit was funny and belongs in the pit. you can have both.
i find it strange that it’s not just the some new poster that doesn’t know whats what, but some heavy hitters that have been around the block and should know what this is when they see it.
cricetus,neutron star i know shitting on good rants all the time can really bring you down. here’s a little pick-me-up for what’s left of your soul. Have a bag of cookies, there only 100 calories each.
7.5 on the rant, it had a good beat and I could dance to it. 
Fatgail, welcome to the SDMB. You are my new favorite poster, and I hope you stick around.
“Toenail-sized cookies”, yep.
I am intrigued by the Big Drawer O’ Goodies at your workplace. Is it perhaps karmic compensation for having to work with a man who whistles little tunes all day?
nuetron star, is the nerve the OP struck in your teeny pink peen perchance?
I wonder, if you stuffed enough 100-calorie packs into the man who whistles little tunes all day, if you could convince the rest of the office to join you in an early afternoon celebration. It seems like just the sort of thing to really build team spirit and encourage people to think inside the box.