Imagine you’re in a bar, or some other social place where there’s a group of you. You are all seated on a bench seat chatting away quite happily.
You are talking to the person next to you and getting on quite well with them. There is approximately a four inch gap between your bottom and their bottom.
As your conversation progresses you notice that the person is so engaged by the conversation that they begin to edge toward you inch by inch until your bottoms are flush.
(For clarity, I’m not talking about sitting next to someone you may wish to sleep with, in which case you might want them to get close. I’m talking about a friend/stranger).
Does this bother anyone else or is it just me?
Is there such a thing as personal space, and if so, what is it?
Having typed this, I now realise that it’s probably more of an IMHO than a great debate but since I’ve gone to the bother of typing it, I’m gonna post anyway. The mods can move it if they wish.
Although a) it could be considered a GD maybe, if you kind of turn sideways and squint your eyes a bit and b) it’s about time that Buckner did some work around here:)
It bothers me as well. I don’t know why but whenever anyone gets as close as you described I simply divert their attention with a cough or something and then retreat my bottom. Only with complete strangers or a family members though. Weird?, yes.
I do not have a problem with friends and family getting close, but if you are a stranger then backoff a little. I can not stand people who invade my personal space (within 2 feet).
*I also have this thing about perfect strangers talking to me, i feel like this, if i am in danger or on fire then fine, say something but if you want a cigg or change then backoff ( they do this alot where i live and work…) and i have no problem telling them so. *
This happens in the workplace, too. You’re sitting at your desk in your jail cell - I mean cubicle - and someone’s standing within a micrometer of your chin. Kinda awkard, yep - and you have nowhere to go!
In a bar, no. In most of the bars I frequent, if the chairs aren’t bolted to the floor, everyone winds up almost on top of the people they’re talking to. Even then, it’s not uncommon to end up with someone in your lap. I’m ok with this.
It’s weird. Under ordinary circumstances, most Japanese would rather bleed to death than tap a stranger on the shoulder to ask for help. But give 'em one drink and suddenly the bar looks like a game of Twister.
In a bar or at a party, it wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. On a social occasion like that I’m perfectly happy with rubbing my bottom with a stranger.
OTOH, on a bus, I’d move or say something rude. Maybe pinch 'em.
Friends can invade my personal space any time. Most of my friends are very affectionate; leaning on each other, sitting on each other’s laps, or whatever is all fine. Even my close male friends and I have no problems sitting on top of each other. There’s no reaon to be uncomfortable.
Nope. Doesn’t bother me a bit … well unless the person has bad breath or nasty body odor. Otherwise I take it all in stride …
However, I am one of these space invading people. I can’t imagine being up to 4 feet away from someone while having a conversation. That is like soooooo far away! What’s up with that statistic??? :rolleyes:
This reminds me of the Saturn car Tv Ad, where the guy is so close to the salesman that he could kiss him ( atleast that is what i was hoping the 1st time i say it ) anyway… i would have reached out and bit his nose off if he had gotten that close to me.
I think that everyone should assume that every person has a personal space around them and not be rude and just walk up to them so that you are only 2cm away from them.
This doesn’t bother me so much 0 like Bedhead says, i’ll move away if they’re too close, and in any case, I normally sit on a chair rather than a bench…
What really annoys me when I’m at work is people speaking over my personal space. One guy in particular does it frequently… he is talking with someone behind me, then turns round to talk to the person in front of me(open plan office here - no jail cells for us) - he’s standing, I’m sitting, so the conversation literally takes place over my head… it’s got nothing to do with me, I’m just trying to work (or read SDMB) but it’s like I’ve got a sign over my head saying ‘Please Ignore me’. Makes me wish I did have a cubicle - at least it’s private
