ok, this might come across as insensitive, but every time my son’s friend’s mom talks to me, she has to invade my physical space!!! i’m not talking about 12 inches–it’s more like 5 fuck’n inches!!! Sometimes she’s so close i can look straight up her nostrils! Is this a known medical condition? what’s going on with her?
curious
She has a different idea of personal space to you.
These things vary.
I realize she has a different idea of personal space–it’s not a normal space idea, either! It’s so unusual I’m compelled to consider it an abnormal condition, what what type?
I realize she has a different idea of personal space–it’s not a normal space idea, either! It’s so unusual I’m compelled to consider it an abnormal condition, but was wondering what it might be called.
I believe the scientific name is “different idea of personal space.”
I work in an international office and run up against this (no pun intended) a lot. For example, for a while I thought my Basque colleague was interested in being more than just colleagues because he always stands really close to me, touches my arm when making a point etc. That’s just the southern European idea of personal space at work and I find that some Italian colleagues do the same, while, say, the Fins, Dutch and Irish stand well clear.
Tell her you need glasses and so cant see her if she stands too close to you! Im sure she’ll step back…!
I have a coworker who does this and it drives me freakin’ nuts.
She’s a close talker…like on sienfeld. I always wanted to meet a close talker. You lucky bastard!
Why is this being sensitive to call it? A whole bunch of people will come pouring out of the woodwork and say we should deal with it.
If I am talking to you, unless we need to stand close enough because we can’t be heard, I should not feel your breath on my face. Ever.
I have no problem just taking a huge step back when someone does that. If they don’t like it, it’s their problem for getting so close to me.
I reeeeeally value my personal space. 
So instead of stressing why not take a step back? Seems a pretty easy problem to deal with.
Ugh! I had a coworker once who was a close talker. He had a lethal breath which was a mix of black coffee and cigarettes.
I literally held my breath when he spoke to me.
Yeah, but then they step forward. Then you step back. Then they step forward again. Pretty soon you’ve crossed a state line and they are still fucking talking and standing too damn close.
Then you say “I’m sorry, would you mind not standing so close?”
Or maybe you should start to shake and cough.
Just like the old man in that book by Nabokov.
I watched once a footage in accelerated motion of two guys from two different countries doing exactly that. Except that they were in a room, so they would turn around the room in their “one step back, one step forwards” dance.
As fot the OP : personnal space is mostly a cultural concept, but still vary from one individual to another. There’s no “medical condition” issue, here. There’s no “normal space idea” either. Just tell her if it makes you uncomfortable. But this sort of thing is an automatism, so, I bet you’ll have a hard time “drilling” her into changing her habbits when talking with you.
I can understand this though. If I were your cow-orker I’d be so close to you I’d be practically in your lap. It’s that darned animal magnetism.
Not really… three words… electric cattle prod. :eek:
I’d have said tazer, but that’s just cruel.
Happened to me once at a party with colleagues and SOs. One of my colleagues’ husband was walking me backwards all around the room. My husband pointed took me aside and said my reaction of backing away might be considered rude. I couldn’t help it, that space was much too close for comfort. The man didn’t have bad breath or anything, but I could feel his breath. Disquieting. I forget how I managed to get away from him.