I was 15 when my doctor gave me like 10 bottles of Welbutrin just for saying I think I’m depressed. Maybe he talked to my mom privately… Side effects scared me away though.
I couldn’t not notice. If you want to talk about your issues personally, the MPSIMS section is the place, although I want to stress that posting and getting opinions here isn’t a substitute for treatment and conversations with a professional.
To tell you the little bit I do know, if you are depressed and aren’t a believer in antidepressant, you could consider a psychologist. They’re qualified for therapy, but unlike psychiatrists, they can’t prescribe drugs. I’ve known my share of depressed people, I’ve read posts by plenty, and I’ve had some low moments myself. One point I have noticed often is that people who are depressed often think they are weak and need to solve their problems on their own. But that’s not always possible. If it was that easy to fix all your problems by yourself, most people would do it. It’s cheaper, more private and probably less time consuming. In any case, you don’t need to make those kind of judgments on yourself or your family members.
Some people have lives that would seem to be great objectively, yet get depressed. Other people have terrible lives, and yet don’t get depressed. I’m speaking clinically depressed here.
I’ve never been depressed, but I know plenty of people who have, and what seems to happen is that they get pills after an initial discussion session, and then don’t need further discussions because the pills cure the symptoms. If one is genetically prone to depression, then pills will of course not treat the root cause (which is untreatable) but will make the problem basically go away.
I’ve noticed that people who are depressed are usually unaware of the reasons.
Haven’t you ever been irrationally happy one day and irrationally unhappy the next? Do you think this can be fully explained by the circumstances, or might it be chemical? Do you have a different outlook on life if you are tired? Hungry? Why do you think that is?
I’ve seen people who are depressed be very offended at the thought that their depression isn’t “real” but the result of a chemical imbalance. And they admit they were stupid after the imbalance gets fixed. You should think about whether you fall into this category.
I have problems with my self that rarely come to me. When I smoke weed, they hit me like a thunderstorm, I notice everything I do is pretty much illogical. Then my mind becomes overwhelmed from all this and the quest to success shuts down. I never enjoy smoking weed anymore because of this… When I’m high, I ALWAYS have these sentences/questions going on: Why didn’t I do that?, I should have said that., and then eventually, why don’t I think like this when I’m not high? I become very aware of myself for the better. I don’t like smoking weed no more… I’m gonna guess its a subconscious act to fight enlightenment.
I am just not happy with myself or I am fighting to not show myself. The depression pills may fix chemicals and make me feel happy. I know what happy is though, I’m still not who I want to be… I live on planet mars without weed, seriously. I think I am subconsciously scared to face the truth, maybe I’m very immature.?
You’re the one who described bipolar disorder as “mood swings”. :dubious:
As for a therapist as opposed to a family member, perhaps it’s better talking to someone who can be more objective, who isn’t as biased. And there may be things I can’t tell a friend or family member. I had a friend who did that to me, who tried to use ME as his source of therapy. It wasn’t something I could handle – it was more than I could cope with. (It didn’t help that he was obsessively in love with me, either).
And dude, maybe you should give the weed a rest for the time being. Not because I’m one of those “reefer madness” people, but it doesn’t seem to be helping at this time.
I actually registered so I could respond to this. In brief, yes.
For many, many years, possibly like the OP, I secretly believed (though I rationally understood the idea) that depression and chemical imbalances and things like that were utter rot. I have always been a very happy person (I’ve had a happy life, too – never had any major trauma, and had a lot of good things happen), and it was hard for me to believe that people who weren’t happy (if they had a mostly normal life, that is; not talking about traumatic events here) weren’t willing themselves to be unhappy.
Perhaps as penance for this, about three years ago I started feeling very tired and lethargic, and as time went on I also started feeling very depressed and unhappy. I remember distinctly at one point saying, “Whoa. I feel unhappy, even though my life is going great and there is absolutely no reason for me to feel this way.” (My life was actually going better than it ever had, as I’d recently gotten married to the greatest guy in the world, plus my job was going well, so the rational part of my brain was ecstatic.) “Something must be seriously wrong and I should go see a doctor.”
It turned out a simple blood test showed I had a thyroid imbalance which was causing the lethargy, the depression, and some other symptoms as well. Fixed that, and I went back to my normal happy self. As a result, I have realized how dependent one’s emotions are on one’s body chemistry. It’s a little scary.
Now, as regards therapy itself, I think there are people who respond to it in varying degrees. Obviously it wouldn’t’ve been any help in my case. I’ve been to therapy before (when I was having issues with an ex-boyfriend) and found it not at all useful (mostly because the problem, the ex-boyfriend, was external, and talking about it didn’t help because what really helped was when he stopped bugging me). My sister, on the other hand, got a lot out of therapy when she and her boyfriend were having issues. Neither of us were prescribed medication at all, though.
Sorry, just saw this after I posted. Mwelch, the first thing that you should do (assuming you haven’t done this already) is see a doctor and get a physical/blood test. That would at least make sure that you do not have a physical problem that is causing it (like I did), which is probably the first step before getting a psychiatric diagnosis.
I am sorry about your family. It is very hard I think for families to deal with these things because they do not know anything about them – and there is still some stigma attached to therapy; my mom hit the roof when she found out my sister was going, even though it was helping her. Also, they may have no idea what to do. My husband knew that I wasn’t acting quite right, but he never realized the extent of the problem (not his fault; I kept thinking I could work through it myself and didn’t want to complain to him) and didn’t know what to do about it in any case. My friend had some issues that sound similar to yours and her parents were incredibly unhelpful (even though normally they are wonderful intelligent people) because I think the whole thing kind of scared them.
Not that I agree with the OP’s assertions, but isn’t it true that regular exercise and sunlight can act as well as or better than antidepressants, without the side effects? Or was this study done for mild depression only? (This is not to say that a chemical balance is not the cause of depression, just that the imbalance can be addressed in ways other than medication.)
Also, for the OP, I’d like to share an anecdote. My sister started having panic attacks while driving. Given that she has a round-trip commute of 2 hours every day, this was a huge problem for her. She started seeing therapy, and I’ll be honest, I really didn’t think it would work. Her therapist would wait for my sister to start talking, then they’d talk for awhile about things like what was going on at work, and then my sister would go home. No pills prescribed, just these talk sessions which centered on work/boyfriend issues, with hardly any mention of driving. Now, a few months later, my sister is back to driving on the highway with no panic attacks. She still only does short stretches, and will often still take back roads, but the amount of anxiety has lessened a LOT. So I would say that talk therapy with a trained professional, who can get to issues that lie behind the anxiety, does help, and can help when no medication is prescribed.
My sister has mood swings. She was spoiled as a child and it won’t wear out. Sometimes things pop in her mind (ex-boyfriend) and ruin her perfectly good mood. Shes another victim of living on mars. When she doesn’t get her way(at 24) she is impossible to be around. Her issue is that simple, but try telling her that. She was diagnosed with bi-polar. I go off what I see before what I read. You made a good point about why I talking to friends and family is a bad idea.
I heard a funny story a year or two ago. A guy goes to a psychiatrist and says “Doc, I have this anxiety that just won’t go away. I’m anxious all the time. You see, my live-in girlfriend takes a lot of drugs, and I don’t believe in drugs. It causes all kinds of stress in our relationship, and I’m always in fear that the cops are going to bust in and arrest us. Can you give me something to calm my nerves?”
Said psychiatrist then explained that there are basically three levels of mental stress (and mental health as well): Organic, cognitive, and external. If you have a problem, the first thing you want to do is identify which level it’s on, then you want to deal with it on that level. The guy in the story was getting stress on the external level, from his girlfriend. He wanted a “cure” on the organic level. That’s like trying to put out a flood with a fire extinguisher. What the guy really needed to do was get away from his girlfriend (or get her to stop taking drugs). There’s no pill for that. On the other hand, talk therapy will do little for someone with an organic problem.
Seen in that light, I think it helps to clarify the difference between, say, bipolar disorder and mood swings. It’s not just a difference of degree, it’s operating on a whole different system.
Seconded, and I like the stuff in case you are wondering. You live at home, so you probably have to smoke on the sly and you have to come up with the money too. That isn’t helping the people who are supposed to be noticing your moods.
Ask for help, please.
No one is 100% happy with themselves, especially at your age. You can either avoid it, smoke pot to cover it up, or look inside yourself to see what things you can do to correct the things you are unhappy about. If you find you can’t correct them, or can’t face them, that’s the time to look outside. And there is nothing wrong with that. If for some genetic reason we hate the taste of yams we don’t get upset, but for some odd reason we take the same kinds of things that affect our brains and personalities personally. Sometimes it is good to take one step back and look at the physical underpinnings of what makes you. Taking a pill for depression is no more a sign of failure or weakness than taking Claritin for an allergy.
I appreciate the effort to develop clarifying models, but in this case there is just not support for these distinctions, nor for the conclusions (although I do agree that no pill can change the people around us).
I smoke weed once a month (if that) and I only do it to sorta bring me back to reality. My only problem is I can’t handle the stress and it ends up being an unpleasant experience. So for me, live on mars and pretend nothing is wrong being alone and doing nothing in my life, then get fed up and smoke some weed, have a few realizations and my mind overloads, then I go back my comfort zone and start over.
Really? I think that they are pretty self-evident. But you’re obviously more qualified to address this than I am, so I value your input. I’m always willing to have my ignorance fought.
We can agree that some causes of stress are external, right? While talk therapy or a pill may reduce the stress of having an asshole in your life, the best cure is to get away from the asshole.
And we can also agree that some stressors are organic, right? So what’s left over? Seems to me that cognitive is the big bucket to put everything else into. It may be lack of assertiveness, or extreme negativity, or low confidence, or whatever, but in those cases the answer is not to change either your environment or your brain chemistry, it’s to change your way of thinking.
I realize that this is a very simple model, and that there will always be some bleed-over – but where am I getting this wrong?
It sounds to me – and I could be very wrong – that you are exchanging one version of unreality for another.
What do you mean, “living on mars?” 
I depends on how severe these “mood swings” can be. Bipolar used to be called “manic-depressive”. Manic, as in “mania.”
Basically, that’s why a therapist is better – they don’t have their biases about your specific situation; they can maintain neutrality.
I’m OCD, and wasn’t diagnosed until I hit college, and it got really out of control. My obsessions were neatnesses so much – I tend to be somewhat disorganized – but I’m something of a hypochondriac, or I get some stupid idea in my head, that something’s going to happen, no matter how crazy or out there, and I panic.
Like when I was 15 and CONVINCED I was going to Hell, after watching some fundy preacher show. Or when I was 11 and whenever I got the slightest little stomache ache, I thought I was going to get the flu, and start puking. MY solution was to drink tons of water, with the moronic notion that it would make me belch, and I’d be fine. (All it did was keep me up all night running to the bathroom).
And so my anxiety lead to depression. And the shitty thing about OCD is the more you try to reason with it, the worse it gets. So you basically have to distract yourself, use relaxation techniques, etc.
So, obviously, if not for therapy (and yes, Paxil), I don’t think I COULD make it on my own.
Likewise, I have epilepsy, and I’m on an anti-convulsant cocktail. And yet, most people wouldn’t think anything of that – it’s a necessity. But I’m always having to justify taking my Paxil. Why is that? As someone said, the brain is an organ like anything else in our body. Obviously mental illness exists – and like any other illness, in varying degrees.
Look, if you’re feeling depressed, as others have said, don’t try to diagnose yourself – see your doctor. It doesn’t necessarily mean you HAVE to use medication. And as raspberry hunter said, it could also be related to a physical problem. And THAT would also have to be taken care of.
Good luck. (And again, lay off the pot, if it’s bothering you so much.)
I agree, it is an iffy business finding a good therapist. Also, what works for one may not work for another. Different people respond to different techniques.
You know, you might have mention this in the first place, instead of just launching an attack on others. At no point did you say you are suffering from depression and are looking for help. We are not mind-readers.
You are stubbornly sticking to the belief that people who are depressed should be able to cure themselves. Yet, after four years, you’ve obviously been unable to do so. You can see, first-hand, that self-analysis is getting nowhere. Isn’t it time to try something else?