Pets: yes or no?

In My Humble Opinion
21

I don’t necessarily equate having pets with being “happy,” but like most of the women you’re probably meeting, I live alone and find coming home to a sweet dog who is soooo happy to see me to be a very nice thing. Also, while I love my friends and family, having something alive to love and take care of in my home is important to me. I don’t take my dog wherever I go, but I love him and so do most people when they meet him because he’s such a sweet, gentle dog, and adorable, too.

Sorry this is an issue for you. You’ll find someone who doesn’t have pets, though. Plenty of my single female friends don’t, so I’m not sure why you keep meeting women who do.

22

I didn’t answer your poll because I didn’t understand it. I don’t need pets to make me happy. If all the conditions in my life where the same, minus pets I’d be pretty happy and have a bit more money (pets are costly). Pets make my happiness like more complete. So, basically, I don’t feel I’d fall into a depression or my life would be meaningless without them. However, I do love my pets but I don’t bring them everyone. If someone doesn’t enjoy them, I’d have no problem confining them to a room or putting them in their cage for a few hours. I think this poll makes it seem like all pet lovers/owners are obnoxious and force people to be around their pets.

23

Actually, what you describe would not be an issue for me at all. Dogs are pretty good at understanding where they may and may not go, can easily be trained not be destructive, and some can even accept training to be reasonably quiet. I’ve had dogs myself, and lived in houses where (roommates’ or GFs’ or hosts’) dogs were no problem at all.

24

Really? Since I don’t think so, why don’t suggest a response you’d be comfortable with that isn’t included?

25

This may be longer term than you are thinking in terms of, but my husband and I were both pretty strongly no-pets when we met/married. Not so much out of hygiene concerns, but just out of a general feeling that they aren’t usually worth the bother/expense.

When we decided to reproduce, we discovered that we both feel pretty strongly that kids = pets and that there will be pets in the household when the baby I am carrying is old enough to appreciate (and not torment) them. It’s lucky we are of one mind on this.

26

Going by the results of this poll so far, close to 90% of people are pet owners who feel strongly about their pets. So…most women, probably.

27

Maybe something along the lines of pet owner, but you’re not verly likely to be around my pets. I dunno. Option three semi fits my philosphy on pets, but I feel it more or less means I can take them or leave them. In my situation having a pet wouldn’t make me happy or sad, but having pets kind of improves the quality of life.

28

If you date someone with pets, you have to expect that at some point you will encounter the pets and they will misbehave eventually.

If I have someone over who doesn’t like pets, I’ll put the pets away for their visit. The thing is, when I’m dating someone, he’s likely to be over a lot more than many other visitors and will spend more time here. So, yeah, eventually he’s going to encounter the pets and I can’t promise they will always behave perfectly.

They’re animals and not machines. I can’t turn them off for the evening. I can put the dog in the crate for a couple hours, but there’s a limit to how long I can leave him in there.

Similarly, I have very well behaved pets, but they’re animals and occasionally break the rules. Plus I’m human and make mistakes. It happens. Sometimes I do leave that sandwich on the very edge of the counter (even though I know better) and the dog decides this time he’s going to break the rules (even though he knows better).

As for the mess, I like to think I’m pretty clean. However, unless you come over right after I’ve cleaned there’s likely to be some stray fur. It’s spring. They’re shedding. I try to keep on top of it, and I clean before most guests come over. As mentioned, however, I’m probably not going to do the same type of thorough cleaning before a boyfriend comes over for the evening as for a dinner party.

So, while my pets are well behaved, my house is never going to be the same as a pet free house. A boyfriend would have to decide if he can deal with that.

I will say that if my current boyfriend developed horrible allergies, I may consider finding my pets a new home. However, I’ve spent years with him and love him dearly and allergies aren’t a choice. (And I’d probably cry for days, so he’d have to deal with that.) I wouldn’t get rid of them for someone I didn’t have so much history with and didn’t love the same way.

29

Eh, I disagree. You told her you wouldn’t visit her if there were cats months after you originally said cats were a deal breaker. That she still had cats months later should have tipped you off that she didn’t particularly want to get rid of them.

Now, I’m sure she said all sorts of things and was probably hoping that once you got there the steaming hot monkey sex (assuming there was some of that involved) would make up for the nine 9!! cats because she liked you, but you can’t really characterize what you said to her as anything other than coaxing her to get rid of the cats.

I mean, if she wanted them gone, they would be gone the next day. That you had to bring it up multiple times counts as coaxing to me.

30

You probably should have asked that only women answer this poll, to get more accurate results. Personally, I’d never date a man who didn’t like animals, we’d just be incompatible. My husband and I have three dogs and a cat, and people are always commenting on how well behaved and quiet the dogs are (they never see the shy cat).

31

Well, I’m petless right now, and given how often I move I don’t expect to get one any time soon. But that doesn’t mean I’m anti-pets.

None of the options quite matches “I’m fine with pets if they’re well-trained (if applicable, I don’t think galapagos or goldfish are very trainable) and cared for; I’m absolutely not fine with dogs that seem to be in a permanent mid-life crisis, cats that scratch or free-range pet bunnies (no problem with free-range farm bunnies).”

Does anybody know whether land turtles travel well?

32

If I was single, and a man said that he didn’t like animals or pets, that would send up a HUGE red flag for me. It’s one thing to have preferences, or just have no experience with birds or cats or rabbits or something, but if a guy didn’t like to have pets around, I wouldn’t consider him dating material.

I think that given the OP’s track record, he should try to only date women who don’t have pets and have no intention of getting any.

33

What makes you think we’re all women? And what makes you think we’d be interested in you anyway?

34

I was once going with a guy, and we were discussing the possibility of living together. He had never expressed an opinion about my two cats, but totally out of the blue, he told me that if we were going to live together I’d have to get rid of my cats.

That’s when he became my “ex.”

35

After I posted, I was thinking about this. I have this impression of people who don’t like animals as being less nice than people who do. I was trying to decide if this was a justified opinion, and I can’t really think of anyone I know well enough who doesn’t like pets to say. None the less, if you tell me you don’t like animals, I’m probably going to wonder if maybe you’re kind of a jerk. I won’t come to the opinion that you definitely are just based on that, but I will consider the possibility.

36

I’m kind of halfway between #2 & #3. I’ve gone years without having a pet ( no-pet rentals ) and been perfectly happy. But I do prefer owning pets and wouldn’t get rid of one just to please a potential mate. I might consider not getting another in the future if that ensured domestic bliss, but it would probably depend on the circumstances ( i.e. allergies no problem, animals = disgusting I probably wouldn’t be involved with them in the first place ).

'course I’m not a girl, so I will not be dating prr regardless :).

37

Well, I’m sorta categorizing women as part of the human race. I suppose I could ask it exclusively of straight, single attractive women who are radically atheistic, non-smokers, left-wing leaning, age 40-59 in the greater New York area, but I already asked both of them in private anyway. I figured I would poll “humans” and extrapolate from there.

38

I voted options 2 and 3 but I could have included the next option 2; my last GF didn’t like pets and I had none when we got together. Out of deference to her, I held off for a long time on getting any pets, and then only tried, after talking to her, small animals which were supposed to be less hassle - a pair of rats and a pair of budgies - all of which actually were a lot of hassle, though that might have been because they were rescue animals and not terribly tame (well, one of the rats was, but the other was a monster).

About two weeks after my ex moved out, I got a dog. :smiley: I then held off getting a cat because my ex was still round here a lot, and she really loathes cats, but got one by accident (was looking after it temporarily and it turned out to be permanent) and she’s actually OK with that. This is mostly because this particular cat is extremely easygoing.

It’s obviously a dealbreaker now and I can understand why some people wouldn’t want to date me because of them. OTOH, if it’s because having a pet makes it difficult to jet off for the weekend on a whim, then, well, I also have a daughter so that wasn’t on the cards anyway.

Seems reasonable to me. Not all pets are equal - like I said, my cat now is much less of a problem for my ex than other people’s cats at other houses she visits.

39

I have a gecko. I don’t want any dogs or cats and probably will never have one*. I generally like tank pets. I would love to have a parrot but they are high maintenance. I’ll probably stick with reptiles; they are not fuzzy but low maintenance, don’t make much mess, and are easy to take care of. I don’t think I’d be happy with NO pets, but a gecko fulfills all my needs just fine.

40

We also briefly had a toad (he turned up in a carrier bag just before hibernation; we were advised to keep him for the winter). Trying to feed that thing crickets turned me off anything insectivore ever; having to bury a pile of crickets in your potting compost and then sit there crushing them with a spoon as they emerge will do that to you. So you never know which pets will be a no-no and which won’t. :smiley: