Pissed on and pissed off. (possible eew factor)

The BBQ Pit
1

Why the blazing blue fuck can people not wipe the toilet seat when they piss on it? I work in a hospital. We work in the fucking lab, and we’re all adults. IF YOU PISS ON SOMETHING, CLEAN IT UP!

Long intro explanation cut as short as possible: For one week every month, I take a medication that makes my unbearable abdominal pain bearable. The medication is a lifesaver. However, it has the unsavory side effect of making me vomit up anything I put in my stomach.

Three sips of broth? Two crackers? A spoonful of applesauce? Sorry, it’s all coming up, nine times out of ten. I’ve tried pepto and all it does is make it a pretty color when I get sick. I also have a terribly sensitive stomach that causes me pain when left empty for long periods of time, so even though I know I’m going to upchuck later, I have to have at least something in my stomach.

I have to deal with this, even at my job. I’ve become accustomed to running to the restroom several times a night, and keeping a trash can close by my desk at all times, just in case. Several times I haven’t been able to make it to the restroom, and it was terribly embarrassing, but my doctors refuse to prescribe an anti-emetic. So, I put up with it. It’s only for a few days each month. It might be hard to believe, but the throwing up for a week is preferable to the pain that I get if I don’t take the medication.

Last night was one of those fun nights. I had been doing okay all day, so I had a small dinner during my break. Bad idea, I misjudged. An hour later, I was racing for the restroom and enjoying my dinner for the second time.

Feeling much better afterward, I noticed that my hair and a spot on my jacket were damp. I assumed that I had, ew, accidentally splashed. Gross enough by itself. Unfortunately, this was not the case. A male (it could only be a male, the seat lid was up. If it was a female… then… :eek: ) had urinated, and splashed all over the toilet seat. There were remnants still on the rim of the bowl, and when I had hastily had to get close to be ill, it had gotten on my hair and clothing.

I am NOT fucking impressed. :mad:

I was a little worried this might be too icky, but not much seems too icky for the SDMB. Someone’s brilliant poem about a horrible poop incident comes to mind, perhaps a little too quickly…

Seriously, what the fuck. All the men working in the lab last night were at least 40ish years old, and we work in a damn HOSPITAL. Maybe you piss all over the seat at home and let your wife clean it up, but we have to share a coed bathroom at work, and you could at least wipe up your own damn fluids.

2

Oh believe me, women are not immune from being disgusting pigs. Many many times I have walked into a stall only to see that some hoverer has pissed all over the seat.

If you don’t want to clean up your own pee, then put your damn ass on the seat. That’s what it is there for. You sit on it. How the hell do hoverers take a shit?

3

I know women aren’t immune from being disgusting, but they generally don’t lift the seat to pee. :smiley: I actually meant the splashes were on the rim under the seat, but I didn’t phrase it very well.

For some reason, people go insane when they use public bathrooms. I don’t get it.

4

I work in a professional IT office, and half the time I go into the bathroom some fucking cockstrangler has pissed all over the seat, or not flushed, or left toilet paper piled around the seat, or any of a dozen other things I wouldn’t think a grown human being who wasn’t raised by especially unsanitary chimps would do.

I’ll bet if you hung around the doctors when you were on this medicine and barfed on them they’d see fit to give you something for it. Bonus points if you manage to get a bunch of food down first.

5

I would suggest that women are frequently worse about cleaning up their messes than men are. Mostly because lots of us attempt to use the “hover method” where you squat over the toilet instead of sitting on it, which can spray pee everywhere.

That said, the OP’s story really sucks. As someone who used to have a similar problem (I’d vomit or have severe abdominal cramps accompanied by diarrhea or both at the same time at least once or twice a week), I can totally sympathize. I’m sorry you had such a horrible experience. Yuck. When will there be a vomit smiley?

6

I’ve seen so many horribly disgusting women’s rooms, even in nice, clean places like decent restaurants or randomly around the hospital, where our restrooms are cleaned HOURLY. I can’t speak for men’s rooms since I don’t use those. :wink: I can’t believe how many women refuse to let their precious parts touch the fillllllllllthy restroom seats. :rolleyes: Even if I see someone has left a mess on the seat, I simply clean it off before I go about my own business. It’s not toxic waste.

If you really want to play acrobatics and you’re really that paranoid about public toilets, and you INSIST on hovering… just clean up after yourself. Really, that’s all I ask.

I remember when I was little, female relatives telling me to never sit on public toilets, coating the things with toilet paper or hovering like some crazy acrobat, but now that I’m grown and have a brain and know that I’m not going to get some horrifying disease from it?

I SIT ON THE SEAT AND I’M PROUD, DAMNIT!

Also, sympathy for the tummy condition.

7

This just reminded me of a time when I was very young (still young enough to go into a stall with my mom) and watch her frantically try to sit down in time to prevent the TP from sliding off into the bowl or off the seat on the sides of the toilet. Used to crack me up - it was stealth sitting at its best.

Maybe we should have a toilet-sitting pridefest?

8

I’d love to see the pride banners.

And the parade floats.

9

Why do you vomit into public toilets? Why not get a supply of barf bags, and keep a couple in your purse? Then you never have to depend on the fastidiousness of strangers.

10

Would you believe I don’t own a purse? I generally don’t carry anything in public with me beyond what is in my pockets, though if I have something to bring with me to work I use a plastic shopping bag (if I’m bringing my own lunch or the like).

Honestly, it never occurred to me to get something special to be ill in. If I’m ill at home I use the bathroom, so I do the same thing when I have to work and be ill. It’s not quite the same thing as a random public shopping mall or the like (if I was going to be ill, I wouldn’t be going out shopping or whatnot), it’s a staff bathroom at my job. It’s also not like it happens every single day. It’s a couple of days a month.

Not a bad idea though, so thanks for the link.

11

Sorry to hear about not only being deathly sick but having to deal with idiots who never knew the rule “If you sprinkle while you tinkle, be sweet and wipe the seat.”

12

I thought about using that as the thread title, but it seemed too cutesy for the pit. :slight_smile:

It’s not quite deathly sick, but it is pretty crummy even without the little extra surprises left in the bathroom for me. Thanks for the sympathy, though! And I’m feeling a little stronger of stomach, today.

I’d like to punch the next co-worker who makes an ‘OOOH ARE YOU PREGNANT?! wink wink wink’ joke and thinks it’s clever, though. They actually know I’m not, and for some reason think it’s cute to imply.

13

Wait, so the pee wasn’t on the seat, it was on the rim of the bowl? It would never have occured to me that anyone might come in contact with the bowl rim. If you’re in a position where that might be a problem, isn’t there also a worry about getting hair or clothing in the bowl itself?

14

Sorry to hear about your stomach condition. There’s no way to treat it?

15

Here’s one I copied from a post some time back. I don’t remember who created it. It is rather large and unwieldy, but here you go:

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16

Unfortunately the medication that makes me nauseated is the treatment for a worse condition. I generally put up with it in as much good humour as possible, since the alternative is lots of pain. I’ve had a couple of surgeries and they’ve done all they can do, really.

It’s inconvenient a couple of days every 4-5 weeks, but other than that, I manage.

It might be a little less convenient with the bags that Fear Itself was kind enough to link for me, though. No worrying about icky things in the bathroom!

17

Yeah, which guy working that night could have possible known that you’d be draped over the toilet with the seat up at some point?
Also, why not do your business in the sink? It ends up draining to the same place and you get to run the water and rinse your face, mouth and hands right away.

18

I generally have my hair pulled up and out of the way and nothing of my clothing generally ‘hangs’ to be able to get messy, though I’ll be the first to admit that when I feel like I’m going to be ill, I’m not exactly a master of logical thinking. This was the first time I ever really had an issue, and hopefully it will be the last. Normally, you’re right, most people won’t come into contact with the bowl itself, so they probably just put the seat down and didn’t think much of it.

19

It’s better to be pissed off than pissed in. Because then you know you’ve been fucked.

20

I’m sure they didn’t leave it there on purpose, thinking anyone would be close enough to be affected, but I still don’t see why anyone would need to leave urine splashed on the rim of the bowl after they’ve finished their business.

There’s no way that I could possibly be ill in the sink. The drain has a filter over it, and it would leave a really nasty mess that wouldn’t wash down the drain. With a toilet, I can simply flush it.

Not only that, but the sinks are VERY shallow, and well… to be blunt, everything would wind up splashing back in my face. When we wash our hands, water tends to splash right back up on us if we’re not careful.

I’ve relied on a garbage can when absolutely necessary, but I feel really bad calling up the housekeeping staff to come and change the bag. It’s a lot simpler to simply be ill in the toilet, flush it, rinse my mouth and go back to my station to work.