As a matter of clarification, let me tell you now I am on the Depo shot and have been for three years.
So, on a Friday, I was whisked into a doc office because I’ve been having uterine pain pretty severely for about two months. I’ve also been bleeding pretty severely in a way that is not normal for me. Now, I understand that it was almost time for my next Depo, and there is always a little bit of hormonal imbalance when you’re due for your next shot. Generally, though, I like the Depo as an option because it stops my periods which were King Kong Ball sized pain filled episodes.
I see my GP for my pelvics - when I moved to CA, I didn’t have enough time to search out a Gyno before my next Depo was due and I had a female doc who was willing to perform my pelvic and issue my depo so I have been doing that. Unfortunately, when this pain issue became rather unbearable, my female doc was not available and suggested I see one of her colleagues.
When I arrived, I was surprised it was a man. (More on my reasoning for this later.) When I explained to him the pain, my history of endometrial polyps, endometriosis, and the rest, HE DIDN’T EVEN EXAMINE ME. Even when I was telling him of the severity of the pain. No, what he told me was that I was gaining weight because of the depo and was probably feeling the side effects from that and just feeling the fact that I was getting FATTER. Hi. I am 143 on a bad day. At 5’6". 22 BMI for my age level.
So instead of doing AN EXAM, he was pushing me, I mean literally pushing and pushing me to change my method of BC to an oral contraceptive. I have been on oral contraceptives before, and asked him if they caused weight gain as well, because I remember that being a side effect. He said yes, I would just have to get used to the fact that I would keep getting FATTER. His words.
I asked him if oral BC was not necessarily indicated for women over 35 because of possible complications, like the increased likelihood of blood clots and stroke. He said “Hey, it’s a crap shot whatever you do, but I think you should change to Oral.” And then proceeded to try very hard to convince me to change right then at that moment.
I told him I was not ready to make a change at that time as I needed to discuss it with my partner. I then went home and collapsed into a mini mental breakdown. For several reasons.
Firstly - why does everyone call me FAT? I am 140! At 36 (almost 37) at 5’6". I am tired of people calling me FAT. Is this a California thing? I didn’t think it would be so superficial in SF, but evidently I was wrong. Also, I was upset because he didn’t even do an exam. I cam in complaining of a level 8 of pain, and he said it was because I was fat. Oooookay. Also, my history with male doctors in this area is horrific, at best.
In my early 20s, I had my period every day for 11 months. With incredible pain. The kind of pain that makes you pass out. The kind of pain that makes your dad carry you through LaGuardia airport to your gate because you can’t even walk. My male doctor’s diagnosis - word for word - “Hey, every woman experiences pain with a period. Suck it up.” Okay. In the mean time, I will just ruin every piece of clothing I own.
I did my own research and learned that all my symptoms were indicative of endometriosis. Male doc - oh, no. You look fine. That’s with just a pelvic. Female doc - Let’s try some oral contraceptives because this should help to regulate you out and may stop some of the bleeding and irregular growths. Bingo.
Male doc - you can’t have children because you have so much scar tissue after being raped when you were 14.
3 years ago, guess what “I” found out. That’s when I went on the Depo. And - ahhh…Immediate bliss. No periods, no cyclical chronic pain that would put me to bed for days, so nice.
I’ve had only one male doc who I had any respect for (for those women in Milwaukee, I mention Dr. Yellick with St. Mary’s on Lake Drive). While doing an exam, a polyp just happened to “fall out”. He biopsied it, and it was benign, and just a polyp. I asked him what needed to be done. He said, “Well, we can do a D&C, but you’d hate me because of the pain. So, I would suggest just leaving them until they become problematic, and then we’ll deal with them. They may cause occasional spotting, but it shouldn’t be a problem.” This was two months before my guess what I found out.
When I had my abortion (and let’s not get into that here, there are other threads discussing it, and I won’t go into it here), I explained to the doc about my polyps. he said the procedure he was doing was a D&C and it should clear out all the polyps at the same time. They gave me the Depo the same day.
I’ve been in love with the Depo ever since. Except for this latest doc. You remember, the “fatter” one? After my major upset, my BF immediately had his assistant get me into a women’s clinic with all women staffers. The lady there was phenomenal, and she was just the nurse practitioner. She spent an hour and a half talking with me about my history and my problem and my concerns and gave me a lot of different advice about procedures and solutions.
THEN SHE DID AN EXAM. WHICH SHOWED I WAS IN SEVERE PAIN IN SEVERAL LOCATIONS. She ordered a pelvic ultrasound. I got the results yesterday - cysts on my ovaries and fibroids in my uterus. Hmmm…does oral BC help with that?? The docs I see are recommending a Laparoscopically Assisted Vaginal Hysterectomy, which will leave the Ovaries intact so I won’t have to deal with HRT, but - no more pain, no more periods, no more weird things growing…no more wondering just what the hell that was that I just found coming out of me.
I KNOW IT’S GROSS! It’s also extraordinarily painful! So if you’re a man, and you’re squicked, get the fuck out. Women might get this a little better.
I am TIRED of being told by male doctors that I just need to suck it up or I am just going to be FAT. FUCK YOU WITH YOUR SPECULUMS OPENED TO THE HIGHEST DEGREEE AND ICE COLD! AND NO FUICKING LUBE!
Now look - I am not saying all male gynos are horrible, and I am sure lots of women have had extraordinary docs who have been remarkable with them. So it just must be ME and my history. Maybe I am just DYING slowly, piece by piece, and shit docs just won’t tell me. But for me, I will NEVER EVER see a male gynecologist again. Ever in my life.
They SUCK and if this turns out to be something worse than what the pelvic ultrasound initially indicated, I will SUE that male doc who didn’t even examine me. Bottom line is I’m not paying for his bullshit office appointment anyway.
You may now carry on. My ire is not abated, but I have to go lie down because ** I am in pain**.
Hobbling,
Inky
