Pizza for Everyone!

Okay, time for another installment of Things my Four Year Old Daughter Did. I still maintain this isn’t cute. If anything, it’s scary.
We have a hard time getting MilliCal to a.) Go to Bed; and b.) Stay in Bed. I’m sure she thinks that, after she goes to bed, we break out the Secret Stash of Oreos and other cookies and stay up late watching cartoons. She doesn’t want to miss any of this, so she’ll come stumbling, bleary-eyed, out of bed long after we’re sure she’s asleep, stagger over to the TV, squint at it, and ask “What’s this?”

It’s a Grown-Up Movie, we’ll explain, impelling her back to her bedroom, “Good Night.” I have no idea what she makes of Lawrence of Arabia, or The Seven Samurai, or Law and Order, or Sex in the City.

Sex in the City. We’ve just started getting HBO, and this is an interesting series. It deals with things you can’t do on the networks. Sometimes I think that they throw in a few gratuitous "Fuck"s , just to remind you this is Cable. MilliCal as stumbled out to see what is going on, and sometimes it’s SITC. I quickly hit the MUTE button, and we usher her back to bed, explaining that it’s about women living in the city. MilliCal already understands the appeal of NYC.

Today it was too hot to cook. We piled into the van to go to the air-conditioned Mall and grab a bite.

“Pizza for Everyone!” shouts MilliCal.

Pepper Mill stops in her tracks.
“Miranda said that in Sex in the City last night,” she says. My God, so she did. This is one night MilliCal did not stumble out to see what was on. So either she lay abed listening, or else it filtered in through her dreams.

Good thing it was “Pizza for Everyone!” and not the F-word.

But maybe she’s just waiting for a more embarrassing time to use that one.

(Your daughter sounds like such a cutie!:))
I just hope it’s not the first day of kindergarden…

Teacher: Okay, children, let’s get out our napmats.
MilliCal: F*** no! It’s time for Tellitubbies!

My kids will probably use the f-word on a daily basis from birth. Future Mr. Shanny cusses like a sailor with Tourette’s.

It’s not too shocking that she heard the line - maybe the walls/door to her room are thin - but that she actually knows the name of the series. Are cable advertisers using tobacco company tactics now? “Sex in the City” ads in the back of Sesame Street magazine? Free “Sex in the City” action figures with Happy Meals? The mind reels.

woodstock, I don’t think she knows the name of the series. Cal, do you know for sure that she didn’t sneak out? I was very good at being invisible at that age.

Oh hell yes! In my house, the couch faced the TV set, but a little off-center. I would sneak out and tuck myself into the corner, directly facing the big blue tube, and hours later, my parents would find me, sound asleep.

Fortunately, back then, we only had three stations. And the Vietnam War. And race riots. And assassinations. :eek:

I can sympathize with your littlun getting out of bed. None of mine do; they all konk out and lay there like sandbags. Their schtick, however, is to get up repeatedly throughout the night, whimper from dreams, bug bites, a need for glasses of water.

Since you didn’t ask our advice about her, I won’t give you any, but my daughter’s 4 as well, and she’s a sweetie, so your story made my night.

Ok, I have no idea why this just popped into my head. I have no children of my own so I have no clue if this would work or not, but it came to me, so I thought I’d share.

Hammer a nail into her bedroom door high enough were she can’t reach it. Get a bell that’d be loud enough to hear over the television if the door were to be opened and tie it to the nail. Even if you don’t shut her door tightly, any movement of the door will cause the bell to jingle and you’ll know if she’s snuck out of bed!
[sup]I’m just not happy about the fact that I have to leave this thread pizzaless. I was looking forward to a big slice of pepperoni & mushroom, only to discover that there really wasn’t pizza for everyone in here. :([/sup]


Jeg elsker dig, Thomas

Well, I’m sure every child is different, but that would have worked on me about as well as trying to keep me out of the cupboards. I would have dragged a chair to the door, clambered on the chair, and removed the bell at the first (and subsequent) opportunities. Not quite as hopeless a cause as mice belling the cat, but still.

I also would have pestered my folks about why my door suddenly had a bell, and not theirs or my sister’s.

It’s strange that she knows both the name of the series and the name of the character. She had to have been hearing it a lot to recognize the voice of the character.

No, no, that’s not how it works. You don’t put the bell up on the nail until you’ve tucked her safely in and shut the door (even if left slightly ajar). She can’t possibly get out of the room to remove it without setting it off, which is the whole point - they’ll know she’s out of bed! Then just hide it away during the day where she can’t find it and repeat as necessary until she learns that she can’t sneak out of bed uncaught and gives up trying.

Ceck out the apropos article on the front page of http://www.theonion.com/

At a mate’s place watching From Dusk Till Dawn (those who have seen it will know Cheech’s pussy monologue - worth seeing the movie just for that IMHO :slight_smile: )…

Just as Cheech starts up, “PUSSY! PUSSY PUSSY! We’ve got blaaack pussy, white pussy, yellow pussy, fat, skinny, and steeeeenky pussy…”, my friend’s six year old boy wanders in from the backyard, latches onto the word pussy, thinks it’s the most hyperventilatingly funny thing he’s ever heard, and starts spinning about the room yelling “pussy pussy!”, and generally doing what was admittedly a pretty good Cheeech. And his mother pulling into the driveway…

JOSHUA: Pussy pussy PUUUUSSSSSSSSSY!!! hehhehe
BRAD (my friend): Shhhhhhh Joshua! Don’t say that.
JOSHUA: But *pussy pussy dad, it’s just pussy pussy a word
BRAD: But it’s a naughty word.
JOSHUA (innocently): No it’s not dad. It means cat. Pussy pussy pussy!
[sound of key in the door]
BRAD (increasingly nervously): But Josh, Mummy won’t like you saying it!
JOSHUA: It’s a cat. Pussy pussy, etc…
ME (in a rare example of quick thinking): Hey, Josh, c’mere… whispers It’s a baby word for cat.
JOSHUA: oh.

Dunno what the moral of that is, it was just funny at the time. Anyway, I try to avoid swearing in front of my stepson, but occasionally a dodgy word or phrase slips out. I don’t think it’ll kill 'em.

[sub]Just to add a disclaimer to my last post. You might be wondering why we were worried about the word “pussy”, but not worried about having a six year old boy watch an incredibly violent and ugly adults only movie. Well, that’s why the kid was outside playing. We turned it off when he came back in.

As you were, gentlemen.[/sub]

starfish wondered:

I think that the baby, Millical, shouted “Pizza for everyone!” and the wife/mother, Peppermill, identified the speaker and the source of the quote.

At least, that’s how I read it.

CalMeacham, is there any possibility your daughter got that line from overhearing commercials for the show? I heard/saw Miranda’s “Pizza for everyone!” about a dozen times before it actually aired.

I only came into this thread for the pizza, dammit.

Fortunately, that’s what we’re having for dinner tonight.

Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

Funny story, Cal. Kids are definitely master sneaks. Looks like you’ll have to get one of those ankle bracelets the Feds use when they place someone under house arrest. If she steps out of her bedroom, you’ll get a beep.