Today I was driving home on a congested parkway. For about two miles, I was next to a car with a young mother and a two-three year old little boy in the passenger seat. The entire time, the boy was leaning out of the window, “shooting” with a toy gun at adjacent cars & yelling whatever two year olds yell. The entire time, Mom was oblivious to what junior was doing.
I got irritated about this. It seems to me that this behaviour was overly rude, agressive, and probably sending a wrong idea about manners (and firearms) to Junior. I was on the verge of saying something to Mom…I didn’t, though.
BTW, if I had kids, I would likely put them through gun safety/hunter safety programs were they at all inclined. So it’s not a “gun” issue. I have no more problem with guns than drain cleaner in a house.
but…isn’t this really crappy parenting? I’m not a parent, so I’m throwing this out to the masses here. It’s not about guns (an overly emotionally charged issue), but manners & behaviour, IMO. Am I vindicated in finding this really irresponsible behaviour by the mom?
I don’t know, I think kids used to do that kind of thing all the time. My Grandmother used “You’re brother did the same thing” as a defense to my mother for my little brother when she got onto him for doing.
Of course, that’s when kids still rode in a car laying up in the back window and making faces at the car behind us and there weren’t any seatbelts in the back.
Now days that young’un should have been buckled in if they were too big for a car seat.
Any activity that involves a kid “leaning out of the window” of a moving car would definitely involve bad parenting.
I played with toy guns all the time when I was a kid but for some reason the only people I ever pointed them at were other kids with toy guns…I guess maybe it’s because my dad made sure I knew the difference between real and toy weapons, and also made sure I knew that not everyone was smart enough to tell which was which…
Or maybe I was just a real bright kid.
I’m betting Dad can take credit for this one. I did some pretty dumb things as a kid…
I used to play with toy guns all the time when I was a kid, but I don’t remember my parents ever letting me do anything like this. I know that by the time I can remember having toy guns my dad and grandfather had already told me not to point them at anyone and generally treat them like real guns. I know parents can’t always have theirs eyes and ears right on their kids, but I think I would take an interest in my kid yelling out at window and pointing a gun. Depending on how realistic the gun looked, that behavior could cause him trouble when he gets older.
I’d guess that the mom was in a lose-lose situation. The kids were bored, and I have never been able to keep my small kids quiet for long if they had nothing better to do. You can entertain them with games or songs, but after the 100th verse of “Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar”, they get bored, and quite frankly, so do the adults.
The mom’s choices were either to let the kids act up or discipline them, but she probably couldn’t pull over in traffic, they might not listen if she put them in time out and she couldn’t drive and spank them at the same time if she even wanted to. She might have just decided not to worry about it.
I assume that traffic was moving very slowly and would like to think that her car didn’t have child safety switches for the doors and windows.
Personally, I would have stopped, even if it meant stopping in traffic, but knowing how my kids were at that age, they would probably have acted up again within five minutes.
I think you might have overreacted. If he was really leaning out the window, definitely, shame on the mother. I think you might would have been annoyed if he wasn’t hanging out the window. The kid was probably a brat.
It is a tough issue, kids and toy guns. But I don’t see the point of giving a child a toy gun, then teach him real gun safety. “Don’t point it at anything living. Don’t draw your toy gun unless you really mean to use it.” I can’t help shake the feeling that gun aspect really bothered you.
There was a serious problem in the situation described in the OP, but it has nothing to do with guns. That child should have been strapped into a safety seat. For that reason, yes, this is crappy parenting.
>>>>I’m not a parent, so I’m throwing this out to the masses here.<<<<
Posted by Carina 42
The above quote being the operative phrase here.
Anyone stuck in traffic with a three year old will attest to this. How many times can you say “Don’t do that,it’s not nice” or “Stop it!” to the backseat before you become a babbling idiot? Bad parenting to let him hang out the window? Yup. Bad parenting to let him “amuse himself”? IMHO no. As long as he’s not screaming obsenities or making rude gestures I’m a happy camper.Carina,he was probably playing with you.He was bored (most 3 year olds have an attention span measured in nano seconds).
Actually, it really isn’t about guns rather than manners; the kid was yelling at everybody in a fairly bratty manner with the window down all the way - Mom could have pulled off on any residential street easily on any block, or at least closed the window. Between pointing the gun, yelling at strangers, and leaning out the window, junior was getting all sorts of bad behaviour. BTW, this was a new Honda in a fairly upscale 'hood, not some harried mother in an un-airconditioned car with six impatient children. (Well, she may have been the nanny, for all I know, & not even the mom.)
My SO has a (can’t remember the type) federal gun collector’s license. He legally buys & owns very very exotic automatic weapons. I’ve gone out shooting with him; I’ve gone to Knob Creek, I have shot M16s in the Navy, & I think most proposed gun control legislation is missing the point. I have no problem with responsible gun ownership. I ran this by my SO, who does have two children, & he agrees with me…hell I was a tomboy; I played with guns, nothing wrong with it, though I had strict parents who would have confiscated it in an instant if I’d behaved the way this kid was.
I just have a problem with irresponsible parenting. No, I’m not a parent. However I was a child, many of my friends have children, I have worked (volunteered) with small children, I babysit my neighbors’ two boys on occasion…so I’m not a stranger to the notion of cranky, impatient, hyper kids!