I will ensure that the Beverly Hills Bank of Commerce gives us the money to MAKE that film!
For Whom the Bells Are Ringing
Ditzy phone operator tries to find love during a civil war in Spain
What’s Up, Spock? - Leonard Nimoy and Barbra Streisand as the most mismatched couple in history in this screwball comedy.
**Crouching Tiger, Enter the Dragon ** - Bruce Lee vs. Chow Yun Fat. 'Nuff said.
Anna and the King of I Am Sam
Proper English school teacher tries to help Sean Penn keep custody of his daughter
Thanks honey! I’m sure I can get Walker Inc to chip in a few pennies too 
The Good, The Bad News Bears, and the Ugly: Clint Eastwood teams up with fresh-out-of-rehab Tatum O’Neal to help win her kids back from John McEnroe, who has enlisted Lee Van Cleef and Eli Wallach.
Blue National Velvet: Evil Frank Booth (Mickey Rooney) keeps bizarre lounge singer (Liz Taylor) for his evil purposes, while young Roddy McDowall tries to make sense of it all. With Laura Dern.
Up in Smokey and the Bandit: Cheech and Chong help Burt Reynolds save his career by building a trans-am out of pot.
The High Plains Grifters: Annette Bening, John Cusack, and Angelica Huston as homesteaders with a knack for selling swampland to pioneers.
Holiday InnStinct: Sharon Stone flashes at Bing Crosby, with disastrous results.
**IliAlexander the Great(est story ever told): ** Soon to be released sandal epic with Brad Pitt and Colin Farrell as stubbled, sexy men with swords. With Angelina Jolie as Cleopatra, John Wayne as the Roman soldier, Telly Savalas as Pontius Pilate, and Jennifer Aniston as Rachel.
Road to SpiderMandalay: Tobey Maguire attempts to free himself of typecasting by resurrecting Bob Hope from the grave and dragging his carcass thru another unfunny, tuneless musical.
Great Thunderballs of Fire! Jerry Lee Lewis as the latest Bond villian in this wacky musical caper.
Brilliantly SICK! I have been printing these out at night and bringing them home to Milburn.
The Rocky Horror Picture Showgirls
Nomi and Crystal are transported to the planet Transsexual and given makeovers and sex tips by Dr Frankenfurter
For Whom the Bellboy Tolls
Florida hotel is overrun by a group of revolutionaries and an inept bellboy is forced to try and keep order.
I think someone did this already, Karen. But you’re excused.
**A Clockwork Orange County ** - Malcolm McDowell beats the living hell out of Jack Black.
**Children of a Lesser Godfather ** - A deaf girl gets involved in the family business. How do you sign “Leave the gun - take the cannoli”??
**The Trouble with Charlie’s Angels ** - Rosalind Russell teaches Drew Barrymore how to act. Literally.
**Working Jersey Girl ** - “There’s a hooker in Trenton that wants her boots back.”
Bolero for Columbine - Bo Derek and Michael Moore team up for this sexy romp!
My Left Behind- Kirk Cameron is a journalist who knows that the prophecies of the Bible are being fulfilled and those not saved are doomed; unfortunately he was paraylyzed by the anti-Christ (Bill Cosby) and can only communicate by flexing his left buttock.
It’s a Wonderful Life As a Dog- when Jimmy Stewart attempts suicide, he is shown by a heroin addicted angel what life would have been like if he had been a Russian space dog instead. (The greatest horror: his wife ended up a librarian*.)
Monster Go Home- when a serial killing lesbian who looks like a vampire(Yvonne DeCarlo) goes on holiday in UK, major hijinks occur.
The Year of Living Dangerous Minds- they’re really bright kids, not delinquents, but until Linda Hunt walked into their classroom in drage no teacher ever inspired them.
*It’s a Wonderful Life is still one of the least popular classic movies among reference librarians.
Ma and Pa Kettle Visit The Planet of the Apes
Starring Marjorie Main, Percy Kilbride, Roddy McDowell, and Kim Hunter.
Ma and Pa Kettle awaken on a bus to find that they’re on a planet ruled over by talking chimpanzees and gorillas.
“Aw, Pa, they blew it up! Dang, 'em! Dang, 'em all to heck!”
Peter Panic Room
Animated. Jodie Foster (Peter Pan) refuses to grow up and fights Dwight Yoakum (Capt. Hook) for control of Never Never Land. With Forrest Whitaker as Tinker Bell.
My Fair Lady and the Tramp
Professor Henry Higgens attempts to turn a cocker spaniel into a proper woman of English society. Songs include “I Could Have Humped Your Leg All Night,” “In the Pound Where You Live,” and “I’m Getting Neutered in the Morning”
I did this one a while ago. Look above
Corinna Corinna Author! Author! Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Tora! Tora! Tora! – Johnny “Two Times” second movie
My Big Fat Greek Tycoon – Anthony Quinn puts on more weight
** The Story of O M Z Q Pi $ ** – Sesame Street for adults
**Mr. Holland’s Omen ** - A Music Teacher’s most gifted student has a dark origin.
My Father the Hulk - Gerard Depardieu. “Monsieur, you would not like me when I am angry.”
My Fair Lady Sings the Blues Professor Higgins makes a bet that he can pass off a Cockney flower girl as a black jazz legend. The role of Eliza is played by Jane Leeves and Beyonce.
Pollyanna and the King A small town gets rid of its most annoying perky orphan by sending her to tutor the children of an Asian despot. Disney’s first entry into the snuff film genre.
Free Willy Hunting - Matt Damon must help a whale escape poachers.
Revenge of the Birds - Avian menace gets their feathers ruffled, go on a panty raid.
**The Unbreakable Lightness of Being ** - When the Soviet invasion disrupts the romance of a Czechoslovakian doctor, he discovers that he is impervious to harm.
Troy Story - The Trojans have kidnapped Bo Peep, and it’s up to Buzz and Woody to get her back.
Inconceivable Cruelty - A professional gold-digger makes one of the two classic blunders - going in against a Sicilian when money is on the line.
[QUOTE=CalMeacham]
I
Corinna Corinna Author! Author! Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Tora! Tora! Tora! – Johnny “Two Times” second movie
Genius! I’m gonna go get the papers, get the papers.